Madison sighed and looked out of the plane window. It was a blissfully cloudless day and the world was blanketed in a sheet of snow. Winter in the midwest was going to grant anyone who celebrated a white Christmas. The view was as breathtaking as it was nostalgic to the traveler. Urban landscapes and pockets of quaint towns connected by endless highways gave way to acres of farmland and frozen lakes. 

 

She was on her way home.

 

Home is a funny word, Madison reckoned, the word indicated a singular location and yet could imply a number of places. The word contained multitudes. A concept Madison was starting to become increasingly fond of. 

 

Home was out East with her spouse, Saph. The place of her mortgage, job and life. But no matter how many years passed, the town where she had spent the majority of her formative years would always be called Home.

 

Going back wasn’t always easy. Family wasn’t always easy. But they too were home. For better or for worse.

 

Normally she would make the drive for these festive gatherings but work schedules were tight, even with the extra days off, and it was necessary to take a flight instead. Saph, himself, was making the trip to see his own family. Madison missed him already. Visiting home was easier when she could curl up against him at the end of the day or squeeze his hand discreetly when her mother was being vexing. 

 

She pulled out her phone and drafted a quick text message to him, putting her affection to words and wishing him a fun trip. There was no Wi-Fi on the flight so it would not be delivered until touchdown. She enjoyed getting to put her message in a bottle and prepare it to be cast out into the cyber sea when signal returned.

 

It wouldn’t be too long. The plane was already starting its initial descent.

 

-

 

Madison’s father greeted her at the luggage carousel. The man was a living midwestern stereotype bundled in thick layers, though the warmest thing he wore was a smile to see his daughter return safely.

 

“Welcome home, Miss Gwen.”

 

His words were delivered, perhaps, a little too performatively. The public setting was ripe for theatrics of playing the part of a picturesque family. 

 

Madison knew this role and played her expected part well, embracing her papa. She did miss her family when she was away and they were lovely in small quantities. She did, however, feel an amount of melancholy that the roles they each played consumed much of their relationship, even in privacy and behind closed doors.

 

She could never mention the specifics of her stress and worries in visiting. Nor could she mention her polyamorous lifestyle. It did not stop her from glowing about her dear friend Belladonna but it was a surface level transaction. She could not open up about the romantic relationship she had with that friend, nor about the unique circumstances that made their connection so special and unique.

 

It hurt to not be able to share these important details of her life with family. It kept them at a distance.

 

Once the pair reached the car, making small talk about the wedding from the previous month and the ongoing struggles of the local sports teams, Madison was greeted by a bottle of a local brand of soft drink that she struggled to get back home with Saph. Reminders that her parents were thoughtful, even if there were emotional walls preventing them from being actively involved in her life.

 

The drive was long and slowed by the snow. She took the time to steel herself for the days to come. At that moment there was only one overly animated conversationalist. By the end of the day it would be an entire clan of people fighting for control of the hot microphone that was conversation. Madison was good at keeping up but the effort did cost a significant amount of spoons.

 

Existing at home in general cost her emotionally.

 

 

The door opened and Madison rushed in with a big smile. Excitement to see everyone propelled as she crossed the threshold and the scent hit. A certain pine fragrance emanating from scented candles strategically placed around the house to give an artificial holiday themed veneer to the atmosphere. Madison had come to associate it with winter.

 

Like a hypnotic trigger that had been well anchored over her lifetime, that scent summoned forth links to victorious nights after academic competitions, to gatherings around the TV to cheer on the local sports team, to raised voices, to–

 

 

She shut down the memories before they could emerge. She loved her family. She loved her home. There were more than enough good memories to dwell upon.

 

She had barely enough time to center herself and enjoy the end of her long journey when Madison’s mother, alerted to their arrival, rushed towards the door with heavy-footed with urgency.

 

“Well that snow ruined my plans for the night.” she complained, “I was going to take everyone out to Rocky’s but it seems the storm had other plans.”

 

As soon as Madison had dropped her bag she was pulled into a hug which Madison warmly returned.

 

“We still have time to order in and go out another day.” Madison suggested, pulling out from the hug, “I’ve been traveling all day. I’d like to sit down for a little anyway.”

 

“Well of course we can order in. But I had wanted to take everyone else and have a nice outing as a family.”

 

Madison had barely been in the door five seconds and the tension was already escalating. Her mother had not communicated these expectations of meal plans to anyone. If she had done so then perhaps they could have met her at the venue. This was how she was though. Intense. Expectant and far more invested in imagined views of family joy than adapting to what existed outside of her unspoken desires.

 

“We never get to see you now that you’re living out east and we don’t get to have you very long. I can’t believe they are making you work so much and during the holidays, too. We wouldn’t have to spread ourselves this thin if you just lived a little closer, you know.”

 

Madison started to smile and tune it all out as her mother continued on with her familiar song and dance. This was the standard welcome home to any of the returning Smith children, Madison was used to it.

 

It was good to be home, Madison sighed inwards. It was going to be a long and dreadful week.

 

-

 

The day was long and exhaustion caught up with her. Politely excusing herself, Madison pulled herself away and went upstairs. Her feet had made the journey so many times over the decades that she fell back into the rhythm. The house had changed wallpaper and furniture and the feng shui was different but the rooms were always the same and no matter how many years it had been since Madison moved away for college, her room was always going to be her room.

 

It did seem bare without some of the familiar fixtures that had traveled across the country with her, though. Something about that lack of life made the haunting feeling of yesteryear a little more intrusive.

 

The door with the white door knob. Every other door had a black one.

 

She turned it and automatically her muscle memory piloted her to close it behind her and thumb the latch that would lock it. The reason for the alternate color scheme.

 

Something in acknowledging the action made all of the emotions that had been held back stir. A physical reminder that the past was real allowed it to intrude upon the present.

 

She slumped down on her bed, the same bed she had slept in as a teenager. Saph, a timezone in the future, was already asleep and had been wished pleasant dreams. She instead tabbed over to Belladonna.

 

 

BellC is typing… instantly pinged the bottom of her text window.

 

BellC: Notice me hug you!

 

Madison’s face blossomed into a smile, despite the dip in her mood. Bella had that effect on her and she would recognize a reply from her sweetling any day. It was the exclamation point and the use of the term hug. Bell favored cuddle and Donna favored more flowery terms such as embrace and hold you firmly.

 

 

Madison hadn’t expected that reaction, particularly from Bella. 

 

 

Madison had said that, hadn’t she.

 

 

Madison’s throat clamped and tears stung the corner of her eyes, she was barely able to stop herself from allowing emotion to overwhelm her. She hadn’t realized how much she wanted that until it was offered.

 

 

The chat was replaced with Belladonna’s icon and the interface asking to pick up or reject the call. Madison picked up on video mode right away.

 

Bella illuminated her screen with her typical beaming grin. In her arms was Elphie, who had become a gradual fixture of their video dates, especially when Bella was fronting.

 

“Hiiiii!” the redhead sang. Madison’s expression gave way to a gentle smile, fond to see her sweetling. Bella saw the emotion shift and simmered instantly, “...hey… I’m here, love. Do you need to talk?”

 

Madison shook her head fiercely. 

 

“Notice Me squeeze your hand, Miss.” Bella said, softly, “Whatever so need, okay? I could play a game for you to watch if you want?”

 

Madison laughed, “Isn’t that normally something I offer, sweetling?”

 

“Mhmm!” Bella chimed, mimicking the pitch of Madison’s happy chirp, “I think people offer the kindnesses that mean something to them and try to do for others as they do for you. Games helped in the past. They might help now?”

 

Madison thought back to that day. The day Bell first said that she loved her. It helped ward off intrusive bad memories to have such good ones brought forth to the moment.

 

“I can think of something which could help…” Madison teased, a little life returning to her tone.

 

“Ooooh?” Bella cooed, eyes wide with anticipation.

 

“Did you receive the care package that I sent you for the holidays?”

 

Bella nodded the affirmative, reaching off camera and producing a brown cardboard box, “I was saving it until I could open it with you.”

 

“I’m glad.” Madison said, relieved, “It would make me happy if you opened it now so I can see you smile, sweetling.”

 

Bella dipped her head shyly and looked at the package and then back to Madison, “Are you sure? Your package is still being sent out.”

 

“I’m sure, sweetling. It’d make me smile.”

 

Bella made a quick production of opening the package, her eagerness to get to the contents overwhelming any pretense of patience. Her face erupted into a twisted expression of joy that bordered on tears.

 

“Whatcha find, sweetie?” Madison asked, coyly.

 

“Chocolate!” Bella exclaimed, holding up a ziplock bag full of hand crafted heart shaped chocolates and then to accompany several packages of British candy, “It’s so hard to find these out here!”

 

Madison just smiled and drunk in the reaction, “I know, sweetling. You mentioned you missed some of the treats from your childhood so I wanted to make sure you had them. The heartshaped ones, though. Those are special and have a special ingredient.”

 

“Is it love?!” Bella sang out, excited.

 

“Maybe…” Madison mused, mood much improved for seeing Bella’s enthusiasm, “You’ll have to find out later. What else do you have in there?”

 

Bella dove back into the box and pulled out a long crocheted scarf long enough to double wrap around her neck.

 

“This one’s more for Bell, but you all can enjoy it and keep warm during these long winters. I wanted it to match your eyes.” Madison said, watching Bella’s eyes radiate joy.

 

“...you made this?!”

 

“Mhmm! Surprise!” she paused as she noticed Bella making a big production of squeezing her eyes shut and straining in concentration, “Sweetling, what are you doing?”

 

“Trying to put it in the library!” Bella responded giddily, “I want Bell to see it if it’s for her. Then she can tell you what she thinks.”

Madison’s heart caught a moment to see Bella being so earnest and adorable. She was not yet sure how this new visualization exercise was supposed to work but she was honored to be included in it. “Oh… well. I’m sure she’ll tell me herself when she is ready. I don’t know how much I enjoy having you all need to talk through one another.”

 

Bella nodded firmly, throwing the new adornment around her neck and making a merry show of modeling it for Madison’s approval.

 

“There should be one more thing, sweetling. I’m sorry I didn’t get anything more. Maybe next gift exchange I’ll have something ready for Ben and Sis.”

 

“Noooes! You’re doing too much! We only got you one thing!” she dug back into the box as she protested, a delightful display of her convictions versus her desires.

 

“And that’s okay. If this diagnosis means you all decide to show me affection in different ways then that may be in our future. For now this is where our rapport is and I’m happy to spoil you, sweetling. Didn’t Dove say something about me being allowed to spoil you whenever I wanted?”

 

Bella pouted, “I guess… but it still feels unbalanced. But if you say it’s okay then I believe you.”

 

“Good girl.” Madison said with a wink, “Did you find Donna’s gift?”

 

Bella pulled it onto the camera. A handmade sprig of lavender made with the same yarn as the scarf but in green and purple. It was held together by wire frame.

 

“Oh wow…!” Bella breathed, “Donna will absolutely love this. It’d be so good as an adornment on one of her suits, like a pocket square only way more personalized.”

 

“I can see it.” Madison agreed, happily as Bella performed her showy gesture of trying to visualize the gift into her mind where the other parts were supposedly residing when not in front. Madison was still struggling to understand the framework of this new understanding.

 

“Oh she is not gonna shut up about this!” Bella squeed, vibrating back and forth.

 

“I’m glad.” Madison said, satisfied. Much of her bad mood from the day having melted away, “Thank you for cheering me up, sweetling.”

 

“Of course! Happy to! And soon you’ll be home and get to see the gift we got for you!”

 

“I look forward to it.”

 

“I feel bad that I can’t share now. It doesn’t feel right me getting my gifts when you don’t have yours.”

 

“I am the one who asked for you to open them now, sweetling.” she finally said, “I’m happy to get to see you open them right now and I can wait a few more days for mine. Really.”

 

“I believe you.” Bella said firmly, using one of the phrases Bell had made clear was never used lightly, “Either way. It’s good to see you. I didn’t think we’d have time until after the holiday season was over.”

 

“It’s been overwhelming so far…” Madison sighed, “Not bad. Just overwhelming. Dad picked me up from the airport and mum was kind enough to get pizza from my favorite local place… though she did get upset a little that I was too tired from my journey to want to go out and make a big thing of it. I would have gone tomorrow, mother, but it’s been a long day and…” she trailed off, catching herself getting frustrated and not wanting to let it show.

 

“She really does push back on any request for accommodation, doesn’t she?”

 

“I know she’s trying but… she can just be a lot at times… and I always forget how tense being home can be.” Madison responded wearily, “So of course we have a big animated meal and everyone’s excited and talking over one another and no one can get a word in edgewise… and I’ve been going since 6am and I’m just tired.”

 

Bella held Elphie as Madison spoke and nodded along, there were moments where her expression flickered slightly in a way Madison had come to understand meant internal communication was happening. Even while exhausted she could still catch the subtle cues of the facets, no parts, of her girlfriend shifting.

 

“I’ll be nice and not drain you any further…” Bella said carefully, “And you can get rest whenever you need, okay? Please don’t push yourself!”

 

Madison smiled fondly, “You don’t cost spoons to talk with, sweetling. You actually recharge them. I promise I’ll let you know if I need to rest but I reached out to you, didn’t I?”

 

“I guess…” Bella said shyly, “Bell was just worried I’d be too much.”

 

“Oh sweetling…” Madison sighed, “Notice me cuddle you close. You make me happy. I promise. I never want you to feel you need to change out for my sake. I am always happy to speak with you, with any of you, when you’re here.”

 

Bella’s face scrunched into a tight blushing expression as she blurted out a response, “Notice me hug you so so so tightly!”

 

“But really, I’m fine. I pushed myself hard and it’s going to be a week, but it’ll be over soon and I’ll see Saph and then in a few weeks I’ll get to see you again.”

 

Bella tilted her head and blinked intentionally, “Saph didn’t travel with you?”

 

“He’s out with his own family. It’s not ideal but it’s what schedules would allow. It’s not fair to expect him to put his family aside every year to be part of our family festivities and you know how mother can be.”

 

“Unaccommodating?” Bella offered with a grin.

 

“Unaccommodating.” Madison ruefully replied, “It’d be easier if she didn’t pressure me to be here on the day. But… it is what it is.”

 

“I’m sorry it’s put you in that situation… if Saph isn’t there then I feel bad you’re doing it all on your own. Like I know your family and mine aren't super comparable, but I still get how family can be, y’know?”

 

“Mum tries…” Madison sighed, “It’s just both she and dad had jobs that required a lot of travel and they did the whole eldest daughter thing with me, even if I’m the youngest child.” her expression hardened to a frown.

 

“Forced to mature early… fucked if I don’t know that song and dance.” the voice on the call grumbled in agreement. Madison didn’t even need to look at the screen to notice the difference between her soft sweetling and Bell.

 

“You would, yes.” Madison agreed, “Hey, you. Did sweetling bow out from the heavy talks?”

 

“The topic kind of draws me out. Heaven knows I had my share of forced maturity and parent troubles. Though mine are pretty focused on our dad.” Bell paused for a moment and sharpened her stare at the webcam, “But we’re talking about you right now.”

“We are…” Madison conceded, hugging her pillow close to her and leaning back on the headrest of her childhood bed, “I still remember her coming down driving 3 hours to be at one of my academic contests straight from a work trip… and it’s like. She tries. That’s the part that hurts, she tries.”

 

“That’s the rub, isn’t it?” Bell sighed, “Parents are humans and they are doing what they think is best and cause all this harm for what they did and what they didn’t do. You could go crazy thinking about the motivations and reasons and sometimes the hard thing to remember is that the good was done with intent and the bad was seldom intentional.”

 

“I just wish she could learn to listen. That she’d stick up for me and believe me and not worry so much about upholding her idea of what family should be.”

 

“Unaccommodating, right?”

 

“Right.”

 

“Can’t chalk it to communication skills.” Bell noted with a fond smile, “You have those aplenty. The issue is clearly in her ability to listen and we can’t control what other people think, feel or do.” her eyes flickered and broke into a stifled laugh, “Well, most of the time.”

 

“Oh, does Donna have opinions about that concept?” Madison asked, flirtatiously.

 

“You know she does. She may want to say hi if the call goes on longer.”

 

“As I said to Bella, I am always willing to talk to any of you when you are here. I never ask.”

 

“It’s offered, though. You sound like you could use her company.”

 

“If it is offered then it would be appreciated, but no rush, my love. I love the flirtation and teasing we get up to with Bella and Donna but right now you, Bell, are a comfort.”

 

Bell flinched just the slightest amount and her smile waivered. She opened her mouth and closed it again.

 

“I mean it. Coming home is tough and you get it. I have never heard you give a platitude about how families can be or that it will be over before I know it. I don’t have to justify myself because some of our trauma runs parallel.”

 

“Good damage, huh?” Bell sighed, bitterly with a brief smile, “I’m glad our baggage goes together well, love. I don’t think either one of us should have ever have to have gone through anything. But it helps to know what our experiences help us communicate easier.”

 

“It’s lucky, isn’t it?” Madison chimed, though her voice lacked a bright punch to it. “I hate that we do have so much parallel trauma but I’m glad we both get to choose what we do with what was done to us and use it to better show care to one another.”

 

“I’ll always be here to hear you and care.” Bell insisted firmly, “In whatever capacity I can and for as long as I’m able.”

 

“I know, love. I know.”

 

“Good, because I’ll keep reminding you as many times as it takes. I’m glad I was online and able to take the call. If this helps you even the slightest bit have the energy for tomorrow then I’m happy to be of help.”

 

“It is helping.” Madison said, squeezing the pillow tighter.

 

“By the way…” Bell mused, tugging the scarf Bella had put around their neck, “This? This is… it’s just lovely. You really didn’t have to do something so big and time consuming and thoughtful.”

 

“I didn’t have to. I wanted to.”

 

Bell’s head sank and she buried her face into the yarn so Madison couldn’t see her expression, “It means a lot. It really does. I never quite know how to react to gifts but this is just… it’s lovely. Thank you, love.”

 

“I’m glad you like it. I really hoped you would.” Madison said, relieved that she had made a good call on the accessory. Bell was more reserved than the other parts that made up her girlfriend, she wasn’t as confident she’d hit the mark with her when compared to the safer bets Bella and Donna represented.

 

“I do.”

 

“I believe you.”

 

“So this is your old room, is it?” Bell said, eager to change the topic and escape a spotlight, “Can you do a little turn with your phone so I can see?”

 

“I mean, there’s not much to see…” Madison said, complying with the request and allowing Bell to see the room, “Mum and dad use it for storage and office space if needed. It doesn’t feel like my room without the bookshelves. They live back home in the dining room now.”

 

“Better there than here. I take it all your Tammy books went with you?”

 

Madison laughed unguardedly then hushed her tone to avoid attracting external attention from outside the thin walls, “As if I would not take those with me. I do so love them.”

 

“I’ve noticed. Speaking of which we’re getting near the end of Lady Knight. It’s been lovely to read about the character you took your screen name from. Big, protective, strong and asexual. Reminds me of a certain someone.”

 

“Tammy writes good role models. I’m lucky to have had her growing up. I should warn that the next set of books are a little different. They’re written like a journal entry set in the past of that universe and have more of a police procedural approach. I want to warn you in advance that there are some times where the book has bad spelling and words crossed out to simulate the writer being too exhausted to concentrate and I don’t know if that will set off your unreality filter.”

 

Bell stared at the camera a moment and collected her thoughts, imagining how she would react to an audiobook pulling this kind of a trick. Hopefully the actor would just perform the exhaustion without the need to mess with how the phrases were presented. She couldn’t be sure, though, “I appreciate the heads up. As always I’ll update you on my progress.”

 

“I’d pull it out and read that exert to better prepare y’all but no bookshelves.” Madison pouted.

 

“They found a good home. Imagine it’s setting off your own filters with what you’re expecting versus what you’re seeing though. Luckily you’re only putting up with the shell of your old room for— how long are you hanging around?”

 

“Three days. Three days for mother to pressure me to move back nearer to the family and have kids or guilting me with grandma’s health…” Madison grumbled, “But I do get to spend time with grandma and see the cousins. That makes it worthwhile. Then when it’s over I’ll be flying back on the Sunday. My return flight actually has a changeover by your way.”

 

Bell listened patiently and was about to offer sympathy on the stress of the days but that last tidbit perked her up, eyes alight with hope, “Can I visit the airport to see you? It’s not too far.” Belladonna in any flavor was no fan of the end of year holiday period but this was the nearest thing to a season miracle that she’d encountered.

 

Madison stopped short and almost dropped the phone in how unprepared she was for that reply. The comment about the layover was not intended as anything more than a romantic bit of sentiment. She did not allow herself to even dream that the proximity would be more than that.

 

“I. Buh. Wha. I…” she spluttered, completely taken aback.

 

Part of her wanted to refuse, to claim it was too much effort or that it was unnecessary or even that such a short meeting was somehow lesser. These instinctive refusals of the thing she truly desired and wanted were all petty and did not hold to scrutiny. The fact is she had not allowed herself to openly desire it because it felt selfish to want it.

 

The enthusiasm and joy on her girlfriend’s face, including a vibration that indicated her adorable sweetling was barely able to hold back excitement, told her that it was not selfish. Not even slightly selfish. They both wanted every single millisecond they could steal from the universe.

 

“I would love to do that. Even if it’s only a few minutes. I know we will see one another at the convention next month but have you considered that I’m greedy and want every second that I can steal.”

 

“That sounds like a Donna line.” Madison joked, still fighting the dawning acceptance of this agreement and what it meant.

 

“I mean it, though. It would be cruel of fate to put you within driving distance and not let us see one another. I can even take Elphie. She misses you.” she held the plush cat up to the camera to punctuate her point.

 

Madison broke into an unguarded grin and shook her head, “Oh you…” she sighed affectionately, “Then if you can do it. If. I would be very happy to see you. It’ll be 4 hours so we can sneak in a little bit of time… but if you can, please can you make it happen?”

 

“Careful… you know what happens when you ask for what you want.” Bell said slowly, her voice starting to slide into a space Madison recognized easily as Donna’s, “You may just get it.”

 

“I see you’re listening when I tell you that.” Madison shot back playfully, “For certain values of you, anyway.”

 

“Brat.” Donna teased, grinning widely, “I suppose I had best dress to impress and ensure you get a significant amount of destressing from your travels. I cannot even imagine how difficult it must be to endure that environment for as long as you must.”

 

“This helps.” Madison responded confidently, “I was already using the con as something to look forward to. This, though? This is better. Thank you.”

 

Donna simply shrugged, “You are granting me permission to sneak some extra time with you? I see only a gift you are offering me. Not a single thing you should thank me for… in fact I should be the one thanking you.”

 

“What for?” Madison asked with genuine surprise.

 

Donna raised the sprig of lavender theatrically to her nose and pantomimed drewing a long inhalation, “This other wonderful gift you have left for me. I am certain I shall be able to utilize it to better leave an impression and mark my brand.”

 

“You do seem fair fond of lavender, Miss Donna.”

 

“That I am. It’s such a lovely and intoxicating scent that carries my presence. I like the idea of having a visual focus attached to the scent. I guarantee I shall have new things added to the list that makes full use of this delightful new tool.”

 

“Promises, promises…” Madison laughed.

 

“You know quite well I am good for them.”

 

“I never doubt you. I always appreciate how well you take care of my mind and think of so many wonderful ideas.”

 

“You offer adequate inspiration and incentive, my dear.” Donna boasted, a light of mischief entering her eyes, “Though those are promises that can and shall wait. I can be of more immediate assistance, should you request it?”

 

Madison took stock again. She did not want to trouble her love or be a bother, but she did feel like a little bit of trance time would be helpful, “...please, Miss Donna?”

 

“Please, what?!” Donna growled, suddenly.

 

Madison whimpered, shrinking in posture and allowing her eyes to pout in desire, “Please can you hypnotize me?” she pleaded gently.

 

“As. You. Wish.” Donna chuckled with an air of triumph, her hands launching into a flurry of distracting motion.

 

Madison’s eyes were caught by Donna’s motions as they had been so many times before, she couldn’t even tell if it was conditioning or association that focused her attention and pulled her gaze. She did not fight it. The day had been long and stressful enough. She wanted to watch. She wanted to listen.

 

It didn’t matter that Donna was gently urging her to do these very things. That was incidental. No, it was natural and normal for her to just let her attention drift in and out of focus or to feel a gentle tug towards deep trance with every flourish of her partner’s hand. Donna just made her notice. Notice how comfortable and calm she was becoming. She was grateful for that. It had been a long day. She was finally allowed to rest.

 

Donna didn’t make these facts true. She just made sure Madison allowed herself to acknowledge those truths and by acknowledging them they became all the more impossible to ignore. A delightful and gentle loop that brought her further and further into the relaxing peace that she had so desired.

 

She did, however, need Donna’s permission to finally drop into deep hypnosis. That permission was coming but her Fae love was being coy, letting her savor the delicate balance between wakefulness and sleep, between alertness and oblivion. She always did enjoy the tease. Madison murmured a gentle protest but found the only protest that she could voice was the word “please” and each time she tried to find a new way of phrasing it the same word poured from her lips. Over and over again.

 

“Please. Please. Please. Please.”

 

Then, with an unfair grin on her face, Donna finally let her sink and she let go completely, a dreamy smile spread over her lips. Melted comfort and joy radiating from her in every way.

 

“That’s my good girl…” she heard Donna praise, “Notice me petting you gently.” and Madison could feel that gentle petting, the way Donna’s fingers laced through her hair and pacified her more completely. 

 

“Nothing overly showy today, my love. I just want you to relax. To rest. To recover. To let all your cares and worries truly melt away. You can do that for me, can’t you, my dear?” despite her claim to want this trance to only be a source of calm, Donna’s voice was firm and growled with seductive intensity. It was deeply unfair.

 

“Yes, Miss Donna.” Madison automatically husked out, her voice barely carrying.

 

“And do you remember that little mantra I taught you all those months ago, my dear? The one that makes you feel so very fuzzy and hazy to repeat it?”

 

Madison’s brow gently furrowed, she couldn’t find the words.

 

“I can go deeper. So I must go deeper.” Donna reminded firmly. “Say it.”

 

“I can go deeper. I must go deeper.” Madison repeated.

 

“Again.” Donna commanded, “Noticing just how much hazier you feel for doing it. Again. Noticing how much fuzzier your mind becomes. Keep going. And with every word spoken you let go more. You can go deeper. You will go deeper. No thoughts. No stresses. No worries at all. Just allowing yourself to let go completely and totally. Easily and effortlessly. More and more with every passing repetition.”

 

Madison let herself continue repeating. Settled herself down and ensured the phone still showed her face. She melted into her pillow not questioning why the idea entered her mind with such particular language. She let her eyes drift closed knowing instinctively that it was what Miss Donna desired. She continued repeating the phrase knowing she would know when to stop and that even if her lips could no longer move she would still let the words echo in her mind.

 

 

Felt so drifty and floaty. So soft and tranquil. Donna continued to assure her that each and every thought and instinct she had were exactly as they should be and that she didn’t even need to worry about such things. It was easier to let such worries and concerns melt away with the rest of her mind.

 

Miss Donna was so clever.

 

It felt right and normal to allow herself to be taken care of. Miss Donna was eager and happy to give Madison this comfort and it was so lovely to receive it.

 

 

That made it so much easier to just rest and relax and receive it. Every thought just melted away from her mind as if she acknowledged that a thought had appeared, noted it and allowed it to drift away. Anything important would stick. Nothing was important right now. Other than relaxing and allowing Miss Donna’s words to guide her down.

 

 

There was nothing left to do for the night and she knew that as the weekend continued she could find moments to just close her eyes, center, think of Saph and Donna and know that she would see them both in 3 short days. Knowing that she would get to see her loves on the same day was a comforting thought. Accepting a comforting thought allowed her to relax further because there was a comforting thought to help her get through the next few days. That was a happy concept.

 

Can go deeper.

 

And Donna had plans. Plans she could utilize when they saw one another, which Madison was reminded would be in three short days, plans which Donna was more than happy to share with Madison if she agreed to let her waking self just ignore the ideas until they happened because it would be so much more fun to accept these lovely suggestions and allow herself to be surprised by them. Madison did like that idea, the idea of being surprised as long as the suggestion was accepted and acceptable. It didn’t matter what the idea was right now and she could let herself forget it but she knew she would remember when Donna told her to recall.

 

Must go deeper.

 

Madison smiled lazily. She was so loved and she knew that she was loved. By Saph, by Donna. That any time she was stressed during the weekend she could remember that love and let it give her strength.

 

 

And for now she could let that love spread all over her like a warm blanket. That did sound like a nice idea. It felt so very good to just linger in warmth and enjoy the connection and enjoy the sensation of surrendering more and more to deep hypnosis with each and every passing moment. Miss Donna took such good care of her and was sweet enough to thank her for allowing her to take good care of her.

 

Must go deeper.

 

Madison loved her too. With all her heart.

 

 

The words stopped. There was no need to repeat the mantra anymore. She was impossibly relaxed and so well loved. There was nothing else but that sensation. Just pure and rejuvenating affection.

 

Miss Donna’s voice was far away but still present. The relaxation was heavy like a blanket and her eyes were just as heavy. She knew that she was going to sleep peacefully and have gentle dreams. That if any nightmares dared intrude she could just notice Miss Donna wrap her arms around her and soothe her back to sleep.

 

Madison was ready for sleep now. She knew there was nothing else she needed to do. She knew she could reach out to her partners should she need them at any time during the weekend. It may not change the stress of being home but it would be a lifeline and one happily offered. That was a nice thought.

 

No matter how the week went. It would end with seeing Donna and it would end with seeing Saph.

If those events were going to happen this week then it was going to be a good week. Nothing could stop that truth from being felt and understood.

 

It made everything so much easier.

 

Knowing that. Knowing that.

 

She noticed Miss Donna kiss her on the forehead. She felt her own lips whisper out love and affection and her own kiss in return.

 

Then, guided by the warmth and power of her love’s commands, she surrendered to sleep and drifted into dream.

 

It was going to be a good week.