Chapter 2: Intrusive Thoughts
The first thought Siobhan had when she woke wasn’t even her own.
Everything about that was terrifying, but there was nothing she could do to stop it. The thought entered into her mind, her mind thought it, and even if she knew it wasn’t a thought she would have and it felt external that didn’t matter. It was real, it was loud, and it felt good to feel the thought seduce its way through Siobhan’s brain.
It feels so good being Rey…!
Siobhan shuddered, shaking her head as she tried to hide her face in the pillow under her head. She didn’t know where she was, but she knew it wasn’t somewhere she wanted to be. She knew it couldn’t possibly be good.
She knew it was dangerous but she felt too weak to do anything about it, not yet.
Thoughts weren’t the only foreign thing inside of her mind. She could feel… sensations. Lips. They were pressing against her neck, against her shoulder, and then back up until they found her lips. Her own moved, trying to kiss back before she realized she should stop herself.
Of course, there was no one else there—just her pillow.
It was all too happy to remain in place, allowing Siobhan to kiss at her pillow in a daze before she realized what she’d done and pulled her face back with a blush. The sensation had been so real. She could barely believe there wasn’t someone there, a woman with full, pouty, plush lips rubbing against her own. I could feel her… She was… kissing me… why—gosh it feels so good when she kisses me! I love when she touches me! I love being Rey!
Siobhan whimpered, quivering as she felt fingers digging into her ass and start to knead.
Her hips arched back, but there were no hands there when she turned her head to look. Her neck felt sore, and moving ached, but it was impossible to stay still. The back of her neck especially felt sore, and so did her right ear.
Siobhan’s scalp felt strange too, but not in a way she could understand. Her mind was too overwhelmed by sensory input—things she’d felt before but not in the scale she was feeling them in that moment.
Emotions—emotions that weren’t her own.
Siobhan found herself laughing—no, giggling—as she writhed on the comfortable white bed in the unknown small room where she found herself. The laughter was genuine, and it was hard to make herself stop. The feelings were like the thoughts—external. They weren’t her own, but her mind was the one processing them to make the chemicals that flooded her body with warm, happy feelings.
Those feelings ran very contrary to what she knew she should be feeling.
Her own terror and confusion were there too—buried under the onslaught of external sensations.
Memories… I’ve… I’ve been in this room before… I… I’ve been here before, so many times, but I… I’ve never… nnnhaaa—I love being Rey, and I love when Rey squeezes my ass… Ooohhh it feels even better when Rey sucks on my tits…! Siobhan shuddered, rolling onto her back as she arched out her chest, desperate to press her nipple into the warm, wet mouth that she knew should be there even if it wasn’t. What’s… what’s happening to me…?! I… I’ve never… I’ve never made love with another woman, but these… ooohhh… these lips around my nipple…
I’ve felt this before… and I want more… Oh fuck do I want more…!
Siobhan was shuddering, her eyes rolling back into her head as her lips trembled and shook. She could still remember, and know, that she’d never had sex with another woman—not that she remembered, anyway. She could remember the times she had sex, and the ways it had felt. It wasn’t as though her memories were gone, but when she tried to remember why the feeling at her chest was something she recognized so intimately there were so many memories there to greet her that she knew weren’t her own.
All of what should have been there was there, but the number of things that shouldn’t have been in Siobhan’s mind was staggering.
She could remember so many pairs of lips wrapped around her nipples, all belonging to the same face. Black roots buried in blonde hair, brown eyes gazing up into her own eyes as they sucked, nibbled, bit, tugged… it made Siobhan dizzy to remember things that she knew had never happened to her, knew in a way that she wanted to feel confident but instead felt bizarre and strange.
Why… why do I… remem—oohhh is there anything better than having sex with another Rey…? Nope…!—fuuuck…! Siobhan whimpered, her thighs straining to stay together as she felt fingers coaxing their way along her slit. She was still naked so nothing was in the way of that sensation.
Nothing besides the fact that she was all alone in the room.
Fingers curled inside of her, and a tongue flicked at the tip of her nipple in a way that had always felt just right. Like so many times before, times that Siobhan desperately clung to knowing had happened to someone else, her hips jerked, and she let out a whine before falling into a flurry of giggles.
Around her, auburn hair spilled over her pillow. It was much longer than she remembered it, long enough that if she was sitting up it could have easily spilled down over her breasts. She would have been more concerned about that if it was easy for her to focus on anything.
Gosh I love the way Rey moves when I touch her like this!
Siobhan tried to close her mouth tighter, to grasp at the sheets to stop the sensation, but she couldn’t. She could feel her own fingers moving inside of another woman’s pussy, and at the same time feel her pussy squeezing around those fingers. She could feel another woman’s nipple stiffening between her lips, throbbing with the other woman’s quickened heartbeat, but at the same time that heartbeat and that nipple was her own.
This shouldn’t be possible… I shouldn’t… What’s… nnhaa…! Siobhan screamed as she felt teeth tugging her nipple taut, and felt her own teeth pulling that nipple. She felt the rush of excitement as she heard a woman moan, not certain if that woman was her, or another woman.
It was so hard to tell where one sensation ended, and another began.
When nails started to slide through her hair, clawing at her scalp as she sucked, as she was sucked, as fingers moved inside of her and she moved her fingers inside of someone else, all that Siobhan could do was desperately gasp and pant for breath. Her eyes couldn’t focus, but somehow, she felt so aware of the woman looking up at her, and the woman looking down at her.
Identical brown eyes.
She didn’t need to search her memory, or the impossibly deep memory that reached out to fill the small space of her own limited mind. She knew those were Rey’s eyes. She knew the way those eyes could flutter, or roll, or look so intense or mischievous or needy. She knew how glassy they could get, or how full of intent and purpose they could look. She knew it like she’d seen those eyes in a mirror, and that mirror hadn’t always been made of glass.
Not… me… not… Rey—of course I’m Rey! Of course we’re Rey! It feels so good to be Rey and make love to Rey and be with Rey! Siobhan found herself giggling as she thought another woman’s thoughts. Her eyes rolled back, and her hands loosened their grasp on the bedsheets. Can’t deny who we are! Can’t resist who we are! We are Rey!
“We are Rey…” Siobhan spoke softly, quietly, and the sound was soon drowned out by her own loud, shuddering moan. “No… No, I’m not… I’ve never been… I won’t become Rey…!”
Can’t stop it, silly…! Siobhan felt the amusement, the mischievous delight. It had the feeling of looking at a younger woman saying she’d never be like that when she was older in some general way that was so blatantly false on the face of it. It wasn’t her feeling, but she could feel the confidence, the conviction in that belief stronger than she could feel the certainty that those beliefs were wrong. You’re Rey! I’m Rey! We’re Rey! Being Rey feels so good!
“No… No! It doesn’t… No, it feels wrong…!” Siobhan whined as she felt a finger rub right against her clit. Her eyes crossed, and her legs fell apart. Her hips rolled in the air, finding a rhythm that someone else had so many times before as her finger found that same rhythm. “I won’t… I need… need to resist… need to get out of here…!”
Naked, it was so tempting to reach down between her legs and make their pleasure, and her own, that much greater, that much more intense. It wasn’t just her own desire for more sensation, either.
Not trusting herself to think without feeling it interrupted, without experiencing that horrific loss of individuality at having another’s thoughts override her own, Siobhan spoke aloud. “They… They know… Ohhh that I’m feeling this…! They know I’m naked… They can feel how wet I am, and they want to feel this, to feel me, to feel me more… C-can’t… Gotta… resist…!”
Can’t resist, Rey…!
“I’m not… Rey…!” Siobhan desperately grasped at her own thigh as her needy pussy quivered slick and hungry between her shaking thighs. Her hips continued to move, desperate for more of that finger against her clit even if the sensation could have been across the world for all it mattered. “I’m Siobhan… I’m… I’m my own person… These thoughts… shouldn’t be here…! You shouldn’t be able to hear me without being in this room…!”
Of course she knew there could be a camera, or a microphone, but she knew that wasn’t how they could hear her. She knew that wasn’t how they could see what she saw.
Because she could see the woman at her breast grinning in amusement as she sucked, and see herself grinning as she resisted the urge to throw back her head at the sensation of her nipple being tugged again by such an insistent, greedy mouth.
Closing her eyes only made it worse.
They could see the darkness Siobhan saw, but without her own sight aiding her the illusion of being those other women, of those women being her, was so much stronger. Her fingers twitched on her thighs, trying to reach higher. Siobhan concentrated on keeping them still, but she could do nothing about the sudden feeling that her thoughts weren’t just being watched by those two women.
Countless other eyes, ears, and minds were there, too. She was only able to clearly see through those two women’s eyes, but those other memories didn’t merely belong to the two identical blondes fucking Siobhan while being fucked by Siobhan.
Others were enjoying the show, and now Siobhan could feel all of their pussies so warm and hot. She could feel all of their nipples so hard, so firm.
She could feel all of them so eager for Rey to orgasm, for them to make Rey cum, for the euphoria that only came from melting into the pure bliss of satisfied lust. It was something they’d experienced before, been a part of before, shared with everyone else.
Siobhan was the new one to the experience, and feeling her they all wanted to feel her orgasm, too.
Before, Siobhan had been casually feeling the greater mind, the shared consciousness, the many distributed identities and bodies of “Rey” merely sharing themselves with her. Now, Rey felt all of that consciousness turn towards her.
Wanna cum! Want to feel ourselves masturbate! Love being Rey! Want to be Rey! Don’t want to resist being Rey!
Siobhan shuddered, her eyes opening so much wider. While it was impossible to ignore the phantom sensations, the other minds, or gestalt hive mind, hadn’t been actively forcing ideas, needs, or actions into her mind.
Her own desires were still buried somewhere inside of her, but she couldn’t stop her hands from holding herself open, and stroking at her clit as the larger presence in her mind eagerly soaked up every small sensation of her fingers tracing familiar paths over her own body. She could still feel Rey fucking Rey, and Rey being fucked by Rey, but those experiences felt so much more distant.
Instead, she could feel herself experiencing the pleasure of her own masturbation from so many vantagepoints at once.
She was putting on a show in an empty room, and her audience was loving it.
Siobhan could feel their pussies drenched as her voice came out in a quivery whine. She could feel a Rey stumbling down a hallway, bracing herself against a wall as the hand parting Siobhan’s lower lips reached up to squeeze at her breast.
It wasn’t as large as Rey’s breasts, but the sensation was still intense when she could feel so much of Rey quivering in delight.
It was so intense when every part of her mind was forcing her to focus on the sensation. Her own thoughts were so easily abandoned.
“Oooh… P-pleeease…!” Siobhan whimpered, her mouth twisting as she writhed on the bed. Her fingers grew more insistent, pinching, twisting, stroking with such a focus towards her orgasm. She knew the way her fingers were moving were the same desperate strokes she only performed when she needed to cum more than she needed anything else in the whole world. “D-don’t do this to me… I came here to help you… I don’t… I don’t want to do this… I don’t want to be Rey…!”
Giggles filled her mind, and some of them even came out of Siobhan’s mouth as another rush of amusement made the pressure between Siobhan’s legs feel that much more intense.
The gestalt didn’t care that Siobhan was desperate to hold on to her own thoughts. It didn’t care that she didn’t want to be a performance, a slave to the greater will of the countless women who hungered for nothing more than her own surrender. None of them cared about Siobhan’s motivations, or why she might possibly want something else.
It knew—they knew—that her struggles were meaningless.
It knew that as much as Siobhan knew she needed to struggle.
When the two Rey’s came, Siobhan came with them. Her fingers buried themselves deep inside of her, and her pussy squeezed around them as her whole body quivered and shook.
Pleasure burned through Siobhan’s body, and she whined as she felt tingles spread through her own body. She always loved being called a good girl. Every time it made her feel good, and she wanted more of that. She wanted to feel good. She wanted to feel more from her own body and from the bodies that she could feel connected from a distance.
You’re going to be such a good part of the family, part of us!
Siobhan almost wasn’t sure if her feelings were the laughter or the tears as she lost consciousness.