I stepped foot outside my habitation unit. A construct of marvelous proportions. A gift freely given by the affini to each and every sophont, terran or otherwise, among the stars. It was nice. It was how things should have always been but weren't. Now I got to enjoy being spoiled by the affini while doing whatever I wanted… but what I wanted was out of reach.
My life's passion, art, sat far out of reach. It was gone. A mental block more insidious than any before it stood in the way. Something silenced my emotions. Muted them. Held them underwater until they drowned in cold misery.
In an effort to fix it I tried reaching out to others. They helped so much so often, but I felt like a burden. The lack of emotions and fulfillment of my sole desire left me feeling worthless. Bothering others with my troubles again, seemed like it might finally be the feather that broke the camel's back and would leave them all finally frustrated and upset with me enough to ghost me. They should ghost me.
I felt like a lifeless ghost numb to the world drifting along the wide lively streets of New Petersburg, a city founded on Mars before the dawn of the Terran Accord. The affini of course tore the city up by the roots as almost none of the structures held up to Compact building codes, let alone accessibility standards. A rotten specter of a city turned into paradise. Maybe the affini could do the same to me? Turn the ugly hollow ghost that was Winter Lockett into something beautiful and lively.
I gave a hollow light chuckle as my downcast eyes led the way to somewhere I hadn't decided on. The amusement coming from the fact I wasn't even all that ugly. Rather I might be considered attractive—though not by corporate beauty standards—simply due to class-G xenodrugs. The only xenodrugs I'd been willing to take. It was a personal preference. I just… didn't like the idea of having my mental state altered.
Ironic as of late. That rule that guiding rule that my autistic brain fixated on—like many others—lost its original axiomatic reason for existing. The rule was because well… I had felt like a concrete me before. A solid definable consistent Winter. Then I started on hormones and became someone else entirely. A new Winter born from the frozen hell that was her prior existence. The new Winter being far more unstable as she now experienced emotion vibrantly and fully.
I'd kick a rock but affini didn't leave tripping hazards around. The streets were clean and clear. Busy elsewhere. Due to my anxiety, I managed to get my new habitation unit placed in an area with a low population density. It was nice to not have to worry about being seen by others.
Anyway, my ponderance of where everything went wrong was still happening as I aimlessly wandered. I previously didn't want to change my mind because it felt like me and anything else wouldn't be me… but now. Now I made friends and learned a very important thing about myself… Singlets didn't argue with themselves, they didn't have multiple threads of emotion that often conflicted, they didn't switch mental states that were easily able to remember their own memories, and struggled to remember those belonging to other states.
Using the term plural felt wrong… to me. Other facets of me preferred it or ignored it. That's what we were… Or I was. A facet of a whole. A reflective transparent surface at an angle similar to but off from the rest. The subconscious sea of Winter acted and thought very differently depending on which facet reflected its surface. Each facet revealed different things buried in its depths. Different thoughts, different feelings, and different memories. You could spot those things from other facets but never with the same ease, never with the same clarity.
All of that circled right back around to my problem. Whatever off angled facet was showing the sea's surface right now showed very little. Nothing could be gleaned through it. The feelings were distant and hazy, same with memories, but the thoughts simply… came out inauthentic feeling. I wasn't Winter but I was. I was the ghost of Winter. An empty transparent reflection of a living feeling, thinking caring creature.
The Winter that befriended my friends… our friends was not me. I wanted to be her, the Winter everyone knew and liked and helped. The one who felt things other than a stinging empty sorrow. I wished to be the Winter that cared. That loved. That was brimming with overwhelming gay passion that had carried on and on and on over so long. The same gay passion that filled her art. My art. The art I couldn't even properly create anymore.
The existential pain of feeling like a ghost of one's self… well it was like depression… or maybe that's what all this was, just one big depression. Except this current problem of feeling hollow was days old at most. Less than that. Though the problems of art had begun before this. My other facets had been struggling too, or should I say facet. There was one nice large big one that had spent the most time being reflected. The good one. The one I wished I could be. The one I tried switching back to and faltered.
I figured out how to switch, well they did, the others. I knew the trick and tried and it failed. It didn't stick. I slipped right back into place. Worse, when I brought them out they felt the same hollowness I did and that was a burden I didn't want to impose on anything. Least of all my better self.
My eyes looked up and took stock of where I had drifted to. A park. It was always a park. The Compact loved its carefully maintained public spaces. The ones that replaced the offices, warehouses, and businesses. They turned a decaying jungle of concrete into space for all to share and enjoy.
With sore legs I spotted an unused park bench. It was sized for an affini, yet there were side steps for someone of my size to walk up and sit down. The seat was designed to accommodate relaxing for as long as one liked. No hostile architecture to scare away homeless folks. Not that there were any homeless folk left… well none that weren't putting tremendous effort into not having a home. The affini really didn't like the idea of adorable little cuties not having a safe place to stay.
Still, there were definitely those who refrained from a static dwelling. For them shelters and temporary dwellings were all over. Those insidiously sweet and kind yet overly controlling plants would do anything in their power to accommodate even the strangest sophont. Even me. The problem was I'd have to ask for help. I'd have to know what I wanted help with. It's not like some benevolent plant overlord would just show up and fix an issue so deeply internal I couldn't even properly convey what the issue even was.
"Hello flower." Said the universe intent on contradicting my mopey self-indulgent pity party. Actually it was a 12 foot tall plant woman standing before me. "Mind if I join you? I wouldn’t want to impose as you seem so keenly wrapped up in whatever is spilling those tears."
I touched my cheek… not a single tear or dampness. Though I supposed my eyes were watering a bit. My feelings weren't strong enough to generate a deep sorrow. I was a ghost, not a banshee.
I didn't look up at her. My mopey mood didn't allow for acknowledging others by sight. Vision was the most finicky of my senses and yet the most vital. Sometimes I wished I could just go a day or two without my eyes just to not deal with the headache that was vision.
Instead I gave her a shrug. If she wanted to sit, I didn't want to inconvenience her, but I strongly suspected that she was here to do her affini mind games with me. By mind games, I of course meant unconditional kindness, attentiveness, and care that the big plants were infamous for. Or famous. A lot of citizens of the new Terran Protectorate were definitely coming around to liking them. Still a sizable minority were pissed at the changes. They wanted their corrupt social dynamics to be reflected in legal and economic forms… again.
The giantess sat down next to me. "I see you're having an off day too. Care to share your troubles?" Yup just as I thought. She was playing therapy-plant… I mean, deep down isn’t that why I went out on a walk? To signal to everyone who'd glance my way that I'm not doing well in an effort to get them to reach out to me and help me? My selfishness once again made me the burden of others.
Rather than be the burden I was, I turned it around. She did after all leave me the opening to deflect. I always took openings to deflect away from difficult subjects. Even ones I wanted to tackle head on. "Well… uhm… you could share yours instead?" My voice had a somber tinge above monotone.
An affini having an off day seemed weird. They always projected themselves as these unassailable larger than life entities. Ones devoid of personal or cultural failings. It couldn't be true but with the way they presented themselves it was hard to think otherwise.
I could feel her smile even if I was still looking down and away to some point I failed to acknowledge. Her words were delightful sounding regardless of her supposed troubles. "I lost another friend today. A poor little one in her twilight years. She lashed out from a lifetime of pain. Too set in her ways to change. Still every one that passes gets to me."
Deciphering that took time. Why would she be watching people die? Didn't the affini have amazing medical technology? How could they not save someone… Except it sounded like someone elderly. Oh. OH. "Do you work in a nursing home?"
"I do indeed work in a facility for caring for terrans who are too old to care for themselves. I put on a delightful and cheery exterior for the poor little things and whisper to them everything will be alright, even as they drift off." Fuck. That's… that's an actual problem. She has a real tangible emotional problem and I'm sitting here moping that I can't draw a dumb picture.
What do you even say to that kind of thing? I-I didn't know. I hadn't the slightest clue how to respond to the tangible intense grief of watching someone die. Another facet would surely know what to do, maybe they'd offer some comforting words or something… I couldn't. This Winter just sat silently after getting an affini to confess their intense troubles. This Winter felt even more pathetic and worthless than before.
The affini continued, the one I had yet to even glance at. "I came out here to clear my head. A lovely walk through a nice space. It doesn’t always help, does it? Attempting to walk so far away that you might escape your feelings and troubles. There's not a corner of the stars to hide from issues that live within you. That you carry with you."
"I'm sorry." The words coming out like a whisper. The whisper of a somber ghost, feeling second hand emotions more intensely than her own. No, I was feeling a resonance. Our issues couldn't be further from each other, and yet… her words applied to both. Affini never stopped with the mind games.
"Sorry for what, flower?" She curiously asked. "To my knowledge you were not responsible for her passing. In fact I should be thanking you for lending an ear to my troubles. It's a very kind and thoughtful gesture."
But it wasn't a kind and thoughtful gesture. I-I did it to ignore my own problems. I was being selfish with my small troubles and that's why I chose to listen. It was a manipulation. I was manipulating her the same as she did to me with those words of false comfort.
Instead of correcting her, or staying silent, I just repeated myself. "I'm sorry."
The affini hummed as I felt her weight shift on the bench that held us both. "I am familiar with that phrase being one of condolences, but something tells me your words hold another meaning. Perhaps one tied to your own issues. Having you lend an ear to mine helped. So let me lend a listening vine in turn."
"I—" The words died in my throat. I didn't know how to explain. I didn't deserve to lay my problems at the leafy feet of this alien. Her troubles dwarfed my by orders of magnitude. My own troubles would come off as petty whining in comparison.
"Please go on. I welcome the distraction from my own thoughts." She kept trying to convince me to whine and bemoan my own troubles that I just spent the last few hours going over in my head. Yet the words weren't in that same order as before. My thoughts jumbled and lost.
I sighed. She needed a distraction and well… "I've felt off recently and it's gotten worse. It scares me because I'm worried I won't go back to normal. That I-I won't go back to being me. I don't want to have my thoughts feel like this, or be stuck like this. I can't even talk to my friends because those feelings aren't there. I'm-I'm someone else right now and I want to be the me that cares." I felt tears once again threaten to spill. My silence became a shield from further sorrow. I focused on breathing. That's what everyone always said: just manage your breathing.
Her hand landed on my back and I yelped. "Apologies, I only meant to reassure you." The fact that she kept her hand on my back rather than remove it was more than telling. Just another manipulation. One I happen to not call out.
A hand rubbed my back and gently attempted to coax more words out of me. I didn't know what else to say. To supply the context for those feelings would take more social energy than I could muster. My emotional supply and social capacity were already spent and I hadn't even used them today. I barely used them yesterday… okay I used them a lot the morning before but it had been long enough that I shouldn't feel like this.
The affini decided to speak instead. "If I may ask, have you hydrated and taken your medicine?"
"And have you eaten anything?"
I paused… my memories of prior eating flickering through. I ate the day before, and a small snack this morning which was… Oh, seven hours ago. "Not much…" Except now I knew she was going to insist it was from not eating. "But! But I did eat the other day and still had the same problem."
"Of course. Though if you feel up to it, I'd love to take you somewhere so you can eat. Oftentimes when one is feeling down they'll forget the basics of self-care. Having your feelings spiral further from malnourishment would be bad, would it not?" She had a point. And her hand of woven vines had yet to cease rubbing my back.
"It would be, but it doesn't fix anything." The words were a touch more aggressive than I'd like… Fuck. That was the problem. I wasn't an aggressive individual. Not the me that I was normally. She didn't have a shred of anger or malice in her soul. That Winter literally could not feel hate or anger. The feelings did not exist within her. They existed in another Winter. One that wasn't allowed near the front.
The affini cut off my thoughts with a short laugh. She just watched someone die, how was she cheery? Why was she helping me? I needed to stop making her time harder but I couldn't. Her words followed. "I never said it would, but if you're interested in solutions I have a variety of xenodrugs that could provide relief to your troubles."
My head shook forcefully, exacerbating my neck pain… Oh crap I was in actual physical pain from a headache plus neck and spine issues. Of course I was irritable when in physical pain. Stupid awful flesh.
"Are you sure? It'd be no trouble at all." She offered again. An affini trying to get a sophont to take xenodrugs. I could almost laugh at how predictable that was. Except not really. I really didn't have the emotions for a laugh.
"I-I'm sure." The words hung in the air for a moment before I added context. I always needed to explain and elaborate… or did I? It felt like something I would normally do, but I lacked the ability to accurately recall much from before I became the lens of thought known as Winter. A time dating back less than an entire day. With the exception of my rules and random flickers of memories that aligned with how I was… none of them were recent. This state was not how I'd been in a long time.
Her hand moved up to rest upon my shoulder. "Well, dearest petal, we should still get some food in you. Then you can tell me all about your missing feelings, and fears."
She kept pressing me for more and… "Why are you doing this? You're suffering too. Shouldn't you go see a therapist? Do affini have therapists for each other?" The words came out and I couldn't even begin to unravel what feelings lurked underneath them. Only that she shouldn't waste her time with me.
"We do. Though most find their pets enough of a mental aid that it’s uncommon. Besides, petal, you could take your own advice. Go see a therapist for your troubles." Her turning that around on me was entirely unfair. She shouldn't be using my words against me.
"Well… I uhm." I made a lot of excuses for not seeing one. Before in the accord I couldn't afford it but now? I merely kept my eyes down.
"You should be eating." And with that the affini scooped me up into her vines and placed me to be seated on her shoulder.
I flailed, my breath hitched. Affini weren't supposed to do this to independents! "I-I'm an independent sophont!" More of my heart came out in those four words than in any I'd even though in the past day.
"I'm well aware of that little one. You might not have many feelings left but you still have the look of a terran in need of an owner." She-she was trying to domesticate me?! Every affini was this nice but none had made a move. Nobody made a move on me, especially not all the sophonts I kept constantly flirting with… Stars. That an affini especially one that was moping w-would just do that?!
My face felt warm. My expression was shifting in a confused manner. This manipulative plant somehow got me feeling things again and uhm fuck. I-I was about to be domesticated. I-I'd tell her off but she did finally breathe some life back into me and that was worth more than I could ever hope to express.
A single whispered, "Why?" Escaped my lips.
"Because we both need our days brightened and I can't imagine anything more fulfilling than helping you out of your little stupor." Why were affini all like this? Every last one was too unconditionally caring and sweet and also massive flirts. Wait, shit, was this her flirting with me? "Besides, I think I've gone long enough without a little one to call my own." Yup, She was flirting.
My mind ran in like twelve different directions. I was feeling better. Being rude to her was off the table because again she just watched someone die, and I didn't have the heart to be cruel. I liked being flirted with. I was scared to be domesticated. The fact that I was a gay subby mess only added to the pile of what the actual stars was going on. The only thought that wasn't on my mind was my prior troubles.
With burning cheeks I finally stole a glance at the unnamed affini. She was big. Like I knew that. They were all big but well um… It just always gets me. Size differences are uhm, hot actually? The lavender stalks wove around her giant form. Including two acting as large bushy antennae.
Her scent was crisp, and strong, and powerfully herbaceous but I was unfamiliar with scents enough to pin it down. Worse the more it filled the air the more I breathed and a tingling warmth was spreading. "A-Are you drugging me?"
"Not yet, little one." Her smug grin was barely visible from my position on her shoulder. "You'll have to ask first."
Stars i-if it wasn't the xenodrugs then why was I feeling all hot and tingly and gay? Aaah! Manipulative overgrown houseplants. She was doing something, but affini never lie outright. They’re like devils or fae. They trick you with carefully worded stuff and then ensnare you. Most of my friends were already florets, having been drawn in by the promise of a giant plant who'd dom the shit out of them. They made it sound so good and uhm gosh I was gay.
We sat down at a small dining place someone had set up. They weren't even a floret affini pair, just someone who set up this place. I think I remembered someone mentioning that like, he always wanted to open a restaurant but could never afford it. The new Terran protectorate was full of stories like that. Well those stories and ones of rebels trying to blow stuff up.
I scarfed down some dinner rolls and then placed an order for food I might not even have room for. Not after all the bread. I didn't do moderation. Either I threw all of myself at something or basically nothing. Also she was absolutely right about me needing to eat.
Sitting across from me the alien beauty had her elbows on the table and her chin perched atop her interwoven hands. "So might I know the name of the lovely terran I saved from hunger?"
I choked on a roll and she used a vine to help me dislodge the rogue bread. I coughed a bit more. "Well uhm… can you not call me a terran. I, uhm, prefer sophont."
"I'd be delighted to, flower. So may I know the name of this adorable little sophont before me?" Of course she never dropped the flirting.
My finger scratched my overly warm checks as I looked at something very interesting that was somewhere not in her direction. "Oh, I'm uh Winter Lockett, she/it."
She reached out and with a finger under my chin guided my face to look back at her. "Pleasure to meet you Winter, I'm Salvia Divinus, Second Bloom, she/her but I don't mind other pronouns." Her inhuman green eyes had golden flecks in them. All eight of them arrayed like those of a spider in various sizes. "And I must say it's been the highlight of my day to meet you."
My hands curled up in front of my chest using each other to fidget and stim with. Oh gosh how did me moping for a day turn into something like a date?! The only problem was I-I knew that I didn't have the energy to socialize, but my gay heart had been set ablaze.
WAIT ONE SECOND… Oh stars, I uhm I felt like me again. The cute little gay Winter. The one who knew how to art. Oh stars, my art! I should be at home drawing?! Why didn't I bring my sketchbook?! Dumb mopey Winter forgot the sketchbook! What if I switched again? Then I might forget all the things I want to draw. Aaaaa!
While I drifted off into my own internal joy of feeling like myself again, I failed to notice that I had a big ole smile plastered on my face and that the affini had started petting me while I wiggled excitedly.
"Darling Winter, I must ask after your delightful change in demeanor, but are you still feeling off? If not for your appearance I could mistake you for another sophont." Oh Stars she noticed my change in mood/facet/whatever.
"Oh uhm… I feel a lot better now! Thanks for your help and sorry I was being mopey earlier. I have uhm… different moods or stuff. A friend told me I'm plural and I'm not sure on that but it did sound similar so uh yeah…" Stars, I hoped she didn't ask me to explain. Wait, I needed to explain about the whole social exhaustion stuff. "So uhm, I've been having trouble being like, social or rather I've been doing it too much and well I should probably stop talking for a while and just relax or something. Trying to conversation takes a lot of energy and—"
A giant plant finger on my lips silenced me. Well not by keeping my mouth shut but by like, distracting me. My attention got snapped out of whatever rambling I was on and uhm… She spoke. "Well then, I suppose I'll have to enjoy your company in silence then." Her hand then went back to petting me on the top of my head.
Right silence. Not socializing… but I wanted to talk but I might burn myself out again, but also I was so happy to be feeling right again it all conflicted and well… I sat there silently being petted by a large plant that wanted to turn me into property. It was admittedly a very hot idea and the dinner rolls were a welcome distraction for my hands and mouth. Otherwise, I might start biting my hands to stim.
Gosh, that other facet really didn't have the autistic vibes like I did… then again not many did. Most were boring and didn't flap their hands or nibble on fidget toys or whatever else I happened to have compiled to tinker with. I did because gosh I was such an autistic trans girl. Like how did other sophonts just not nibble and flap and stuff? Impossible. Hands and teeth needed to do things. Like eat more dinner rolls!
The fact that Salvia, the big plant lady, was still here staring at me like I was the most adorable thing she'd ever seen did not escape my notice and only made my warm cheeks grow hotter. Her scent was still all around and the aroma was still sending those waves of tingly bliss through me. Okay she had to be putting something into the air. Getting that gay off of smelling a flower woman definitely wasn't what was happening.
Then again if she was drugging me without asking well uhm I'd be a little mad. I had my rules even if right now I was just imagining her injecting me with a bunch of the feel good xenodrugs and whisking me off to be a pet. Those were fantasies! Well uhm, actually I knew a few friends who that happened to and they still told me about how much they loved that… when their owners allowed them to be lucid.
Stars, I was glad we both decided to be silent. I definitely wouldn't survive a conversation while she was intent on domesticating me. Something that I was like 99% sure was going on based on her wording and flirting. Like how did this even happen? Wait… fuck I couldn't remember how this all started because that sad mopey Winter was the one in charge and I didn't keep her memories. I mean I could force myself to recall but that'd give me a headache, be very unclear and would run the risk of like, me slipping back into that facet and I really really really extremely did not want to go back to being miserable.
Like why would I want to go back to that? I was on a date with a hot affini eyeing me with way to many eyes who made me feel so fuzzy and gay. All the while giving me head pats and shoulder rides… Was I already domesticated? This felt like I was already a pet. Should I just ask? "Uhm,,, am I your pet now?"
I stole a glance at the affini petting me. Her smile was entirely too predatory. Her eight eyes all fixated on me. "That depe— you know what flower? I'm not going to dance around the horse. Yes, you're my floret now. I'll have you sign the paperwork later."
My eyes went a little wide… Oh stars, Oh gosh. I was a floret now! Wait what about the drug stuff and everything else? "Uhm… you're not going to make me take xenodrugs are you? Like ones other than the class-G ones. Also I'm gonna still get to like, do art and hangout with my friends too right? How is moving going to work? Also I don't really know anyth—"
She shushed me with a look plus a head pat and I shrank in my seat. "Winter, no more talking. Now, yes I'm going to be giving you xenodrugs. Yes, you'll be living with me. Yes, you'll see your adorable little friends. I'll work out the details. So just relax."
"Okay!" I chirped. Except I didn't relax because I didn't know the meaning of the word! Relaxing was for when I was asleep or passed out. Instead I worried a bunch about all the details even though she already said she'd handle it all.
The food arrived and as predicted I ate too much bread. I still nibbled on the sandwich but like I was full of dinner rolls and butter.
By the time I gave up on the sandwich I was wiggling in my seat. Leaving would be rude. I mean she was like my owner or something now, except I was definitely rushing into this. Really I needed to go home and consult my friends. Most would be congratulating me—with their owner's permission of course— the rest were uhm… let's just say my other friends were not fans of domestication. Sure the Affini dismantled capitalism and the fascist Accord government, but domestication bothered them and we had to disagree on the validity of it.
Still I sat there silently worrying about every possible thing that could and would happen. Also I wanted to art! I hadn't drawn more than a doodle in like a week and I needed to get the squiggles and lines onto paper. Yet I was trapped! Trapped by social convention that leaving would be rude and also I was maybe property now and didn't get to decide that. Gah!!! What do?!
Wait! That's what having an owner was for! "Uhm Ma'am, I want to like go home and do art because I feel really arty right now and I haven’t been able—"
She picked me up along with the leftover container that I hadn't noticed her box up. "Now where does my new little floret live?" She had me tucked under her arm like an object just dangling there… It was kinda painful.
"M-My back hurts." Before I even finished the words I was shifted to be cradled in her arms. Only now I was looking up at her hungry eyes. What was she waiting on… "Oh right, directions! Uhm… I think I got lost but uh…" I typed in my address into my comm unit. "I live here."
With that she carried me off while I got high off of her scent and maybe started nuzzling her because uhm… I get overwhelmed by gay feelings and I was the only Winter that liked to nuzzle and mewl and nibble and be an adorable little pet… Stars, I hoped the rest of my facets were cool with being a floret because I really wanted this… Okay I knew for a fact at least one was gonna hate it, but well I'd been thinking about it for a while so maybe it wouldn't be a surprise to the rest.
I happily wiggled at my desk doodling characters like I normally did… except my brain was gay and I was just drawing my eight eyed Mistress over and over. Well parts of her… and gosh she had so many parts. Her flowers, and vines, and eyes, and face, and just her whole body shape… except that changed when we got inside and now she was a mass of vines that looked like a creature with too many long spindly legs sorting, cleaning, and packing stuff.
Oh fuck I forgot to tell my friends I was a floret now… did I need permission to do that? Technically I hadn't signed any papers so I was allowed to do whatever. Still, I wanted to be a good floret and making decisions was admittedly really hard especially when I felt like it was something to get permission for.
"Um…" Gosh should I call her Mistress or Ma'am or just Salvia… "Should I use a title? And also uh can I tell my friends that I'm a floret now?" Well I'd start off by only telling my floret friends because they'd be happy for me and not get bothered and tell me I'd ruined my life. I hadn't ruined my life. If anything this affini saved me from being really really unhappy. Also I was gay and she was hot.
The eight eyed plant monster looked my way with most of her eyes. "You may call me Ma'am, Mistress, and Miss Divinus. Additionally, feel free to tell your friends."
"Yes Miss Divinus!" I chirped and switched from doodling to my computer and messaged the server I was on that was just my floret friends. Like I expected they were all super happy and uhm… they did tease me into explaining how I got domesticated and well… Okay so they were all going to hold this over my head, but like in a friendly way. They were all super nice. Turns out florets are some of the nicest sophonts you'll meet… other than affini who are also super nice.
I just uh, didn't message anyone else. Really didn't want the back lash and now was a time for happy cute Winter and well happy cute Winter didn't like to argue at all. Actually terrified of arguments and shouting and yelling and uhm…
A few vines patted me on the head. "Something wrong, petal?"
"B-Bad memories." My voice sounded far more distraught than I thought I was.
Her vines wrapped around me and pulled me into the center of her mass. "Don't worry, little one. I'll have them pruned out of your head soon enough."
I smiled and hugged the enthralling mass of vines. Maybe chemically induced amnesia wasn't a perfect solution and some of my friends would be horrified… but it made me happy. There were absolutely things I wanted to forget. In fact there were a lot of things I've learned that uhm… I wish I didn't know. Maybe I was weak, but if Miss Divinus could take those memories away I would be thrilled.
A moment later, I felt two needles slip into my thigh. Warmth and radiance blossomed outwards threatening to overwhelm my body and mind. It took her aroma from tingle inducing to mind shattering bliss. I could barely think while feeling her every gentle vine, and leaf, and flower petal.
A cool trickle of drool slowly made its way down to my chin while I nuzzled the many vines wrapped firmly around my body. She held me. She owned me. I was a little object, a pet. Eager to happily nuzzle and cuddle and touch and hug my new Mistress. A deep resonating sound engulfed my ears like that of a wordless chant, an awe inspiring hum.
My eyes shut so I could focus on the senses of touch and sound and scent. Sight was a bother, only to be used for art and my comm unit. Maybe occasionally stealing glances at Miss Divinus. My squirming and fidgeting grew more and more sloppy, slow even, as if my limbs were late to every movement. They'd brush up against the vines holding me aloft and sear bliss into my flesh. The scent filled my mind replacing my thoughts with a cloud of pleasure. The sound struck cords so deep into me until my writhing and breathing fell into concert with their rhythm.
I never saw my old hab unit again… I didn't care to.