Lady Astriel Eyefell, third of her name, sixty-fifth knight of the King’s Order, sworn protector of the village of Tamshire… was having trouble getting people to buy in.

Okay, maybe they’ve got a “perfectly functional local guard” and “don’t need no hoity-toity city slicker to keep them out of trouble.” But I’m on assignment for the next five months, so they could at least stop giving me the death glare.

She’d tried the textbook methods – helping out in the fields, buying people drinks, saving cats from trees, and all that – but after a whole month, she was no closer to being a part of the community.

She supposed there was one more thing to try: actually protecting them from something. Not the everyday wolves and other wildlife that the local guard managed without her help. A real, honest-to-Goddess monster. The kind that kept the kids up at night.

At dawn, she set forth. “Fear not, gatekeeper! When I return, a monster’s head shall adorn this blade!”

“Take your time,” the gatekeeper said. She smiled sweetly, pretending not to understand the malice underneath.

When old adventurers tell their stories, Astriel determined, they always leave out the hours of aimless wandering before they find something interesting. The way they talked about it, you couldn’t walk five feet without discovering the ruins of a lost civilization, or getting attacked by an owlbear, or reforging the Lost Axe of S’batok.

All she found was a good clearing in which to rest. She sat down at the foot of a large emilsoog tree, closed her eyes, and quickly fell asleep.

And then her eyes shot open. Some part of her realized that her vision was blue, but she had more pressing concerns.

Air. Air. Air! She tried to gasp, to bring in air through her mouth or nose or something, but no air came.

I need air! Instead, all she felt was something thick, something sickly cold, some slimy substance crawl down her throat and tickle her nostrils. Her body convulsed, attempting to sneeze out this invading force, but to no avail.

Air! I… I need… She dimly noticed a pressure in her ears as her head got light.

I… Air. Her blue vision went black.

“Well, look who it is,” the gatekeeper spat. “Not even a full day and you’re calling it quits, eh?”

The body looked upon him. He looked blue and slightly blurry. He will be a fine addition.

“Unless you already succeeded on your hunt?”

The body shifted its azure gaze to the townsfolk in the square. Many fine additions here.

“Well, it sure don’t seem like it. I don’t see no monster.”