Tabby!

Darn, it’s been months. The better part of a year, even! Did you miss this one? this one, the one writing this! (“this one” is how a doll refers to itself, and this one’s a doll now. It’ll be clearer shortly.) it’s your pal from next door, the one who slaved away in a smithy for a decade or so of its wretched existence before realizing it was meant for something — or rather, Someone — greater. this one’s got a brand new life now, and boy, is it excited to tell you all about it!

First, a little “what happened”. this one clearly wasn’t at its best and brightest in the month or so leading up to it leaving Amberfield. In fact, it felt depressed, hopeless, and incomplete. it didn’t yet feel ready to swear life and loyalty to Mistress Thornbriar (yep, this one’s secret childhood Crush and now Soulmate!) but also couldn’t find anything vaguely near fulfillment standing at that boring old anvil, making nail after goshdarned nail. Eventually, it made up its mind: Mistress Thornbriar was its Destiny, and it was going to risk it all to reach Her! And so, shortly after the new year, this one plum skipped town in the middle of the day — just dropped the hammer it was holding, strolled over to the stables at the edge of town, hopped onto a departing carriage, and never looked back. Dependable, capable Miss Winters from across the road accompanied this one, seeking her own good fortune with Mistress Thornbriar and Her doll-to-be. Last chance to guess where we are now! Ready for this? The three of us live in a school for apprentice sorceresses! Mistress Thornbriar’s in Her second year of Her studies there, and Miss Winters is just now starting her first. this one serves them both (Mistress Thornbriar primarily, of course, but Miss Winters too!) as a doll: an automaton that happens to have a human mind in its driver’s seat. Isn’t that so cool?!

Becoming a true doll was a lot of work, and sure might have scared this one witless if it wasn’t so powerfully certain that deep down, a life of ultimate service to Mistress Thornbriar is what it’s always wanted. it has its Mistress and Miss to thank for that: the two of them took very good care of it, leading up to the big moment of transformation. Now, this one doesn’t want to get too scary or graphic telling this story to you without warning, so it’ll try to be vague — you can let this one know if you want more details. But the gist of it is, the Coven Thornbriar (that is, the three of us) worked around the clock for a few weeks making a vessel for this one to inhabit, kinda like a spooky ghost taking over someone’s body (except this one’s the ghost, and the body was both empty and waiting for said ghost). That took plenty of effort, sure, but then the really challenging part was pulling off the ritual that would actually move this one’s spirit into the doll body. this one experienced sheer agony the likes of which defy description, Tabby. its flesh body needed to be permanently inscribed with the appropriate runes and sigils, and tattoos weren’t gonna get the job done, no way, no how. We used a ritual knife and a branding iron; you can connect the dots if you like. So sure, pretty terrifying. But did this one falter in the heat of the moment? Beg to call things off? Even ask to take a break? Of course not! Mistress Thornbriar needed Her doll, and Her doll knuckled down and pulled the heck through for Her!

And look at this one now. Oh, Goddesses below, this one has been made so beautiful! Its mind occupies a crystal ball, which was fit into a casing shaped to look like a human head. Magically treated leather tubes weave around that ball and route down to its core, an eternal engine that runs hot enough to melt bronze at its center (seriously, it’s that hot, this one’s not even kidding). That core’s responsible for heating and circulating this one’s molten wax blood. Molten wax blood, Tabby, are you still with this one? Because we’re not done! Four more loops of tubing connected to the core act as wiring for this one’s limbs, winding around some wrought iron bones here and there for stability — those bones were the last things this one ever smithed, by the way, and Mistress Thornbriar engraved them with Her most powerful warding runes Herself. They’re like a pure expression of our love for each other… gosh, this one’ll get distracted. So: we’ve got a “brain”, a “heart”, “blood”, “ligaments”, and “bones”. What about the rest? Fabric, Tabby. Layer after layer of expertly enchanted fabric, carefully wrapped around those noodly appendages and meticulously stitched together. All of this material gradually assumes the sculpted form of a tall, voluptuous woman’s body. Cloth serves as this one’s flesh, muscles, skin, and nervous system all at once, in fact! Stick some articulating gloves and shoes at the ends of those limbs, fit in a leather bladder for breath and some literal vocal cords near the throat, slap on a mask with moving parts to serve as the face, and ta-da! Doll! From a distance, you can’t even tell this one’s a walking, talking mannequin. There is one homegrown feature on this one’s newer body: its flesh body’s head-hair, which we transplanted onto a detachable scalp that slots right into the head casing. This one still brushes, braids, and rubs those fancy oils into its hair three times a day, Tabby, just like you taught it. And there you have it — this one’s perfect! it has the body of its Lover’s dreams! What more could you ask for?

Not a rhetorical question, Tabby, and the answer is: upgrades! Don’t get this one wrong, it thinks the Coven Thornbriar knocked it out of the park with their first go at constructing an artificial human frame, but we learned so much throughout the process that it would have been a waste to just sit on our success without striving for better! We’re currently on doll body version number three, and this time around we’ve made the limbs removable (if we’re careful!) so we can swap pieces out individually. It’s a lifesaver for repairs, and also spares this one a ton of existential headache. We have to do the ritual again every time the core goes out, because whenever that happens this one’s soul zips on back to the flesh body for an instant and debilitating panic attack. Honestly, there’s not a lot to like about those days (other than having another chance to prove this one’s boundless dedication to its brilliant and ambitious Mistress, of course). Now all that said, we might be implementing a certain currently absent body part into the version number four design. One that was at first considered unimportant for a doll, or at least too much of a hassle to work into the early prototypes, but which might prove… enjoyable, as a feature available to this doll’s users. If all it has to do is take one more trip through heck to get itself one of those, hoo boy, count it in! Mistress Thornbriar’s still got a few more years here even if She graduates early, meaning the Coven has ample time to theorize, research, experiment, and diligently document it all. Eventually, we’ll settle on a truly permanent model and do the ritual again, but this time in a way that makes this one’s doll body the “actual” one. That’ll be a glorious day, Tabatha: one for the history tomes. Can’t wait to see it, but this one’ll be enjoying the journey there, too!

So, now that you know how it became a doll in both function and form, indulge this one by listening to it gush for a paragraph or so about its wonderful, lovable, irresistible owners. Mistress Thornbriar first: always Mistress Thornbriar first, as you’ve most certainly noticed. Goodness… the instant this one realized it loved Mistress Thornbriar with every fiber of its then flesh-and-blood being was the second-happiest moment of its life. The happiest? Kneeling at Her feet, kissing Her hand, and hearing Her tell this one “welcome home, My doll” for the very first time. Tabatha, it is ridiculous how much this one adores this Woman, this Witch, this living ideal of an Owner it’s somehow fortunate enough to have found itself serving ‘til the end of time. this one is nothing without Mistress Thornbriar; its sole purpose is to be Mistress Thornbriar’s doll, forever and ever and ever. It’s as simple as that! And golly, Miss Winters… she’s really grown on this one! The lady’s got facets. One of them is Mistress Thornbriar’s faithful lieutenant: professional, poised, pragmatic, clinical. Doesn’t feel the need to be Mistress’s equal, but always insists on her due respect (which disqualifies her from dollhood, for better or for worse). There’s some understated mutual attraction going on between Mistress and Miss, and this one enjoys watching it slowly unfold day by day. When Miss Winters and this one are alone, though, Miss opens up a whole lot more. this one’s seen sides of her that it doubts Mistress Thornbriar ever will, and they’re just as lovely as all the rest. Yep, this one’s got two cool-as-heck Witches for life partners, Tabby. Two! You ever heard of that kind of thing happening in boring old Amberfield? Aside from cheating, this one means. And each owner is great in Her or her own way: Mistress is like this one’s Wife/Mother/Goddess, and Miss is like its girlfriend/older sister/high priestess to said Goddess (this sort of thinking isn’t as creepy as it might sound, now — trust this one, it’s normal for dolls).

Life these days is pretty good. Let this one take you through twenty-four hours as Mistress’s and Miss’s living property, and you’ll soon see what it means. In the morning, as soon as Mistress Thornbriar wakes up, this one will feel a few sharp pokes somewhere on its body — that’d be Mistress taking a needle to this one’s inert flesh (which it can still sense through, sort of) to let it know: “I’m up, get your padded behind to My room and come dote on Me.” this one drops whatever the heck it was doing and comes running for Mistress, like the good doll it endlessly strives to be. it provides its Mistress breakfast, along with anything else She wants before moving on with Her day (mmm-hmm!) and then gracefully escorts its Mistress to Her classes soon after. this one is allowed to kneel next to its Mistress and silently work on craft projects or read during class, but A doll must never seek to understand the nature of magic. A doll’s mind cannot handle arcane knowledge and will be harmed by it. A doll must know its place and remain in ignorance. which is actually kind of a relief, because formal education was never this one’s strong suit (this one’s mostly reading technical manuals on craftwork and the occasional woman-with-another-woman romance novel, which the campus library is chock full of). If Mistress needs this one to fetch anything or run an errand, it’ll get right on it at the snap of Her fingers. it’ll also enjoy lunch with Mistress and Her elite associates (only the company, not the food, of course) and serve afternoon tea and homemade treats to anyone who wants to pay Mistress a visit after class is over. Evening is when Mistress and this one will either go out on a date, work on our individual initiatives side-by-side, or get a headstart on doll research and design, depending on how She’s feeling. Lately we’ve been enjoying some autumn strolls in the campus herb garden, Adder Meadows (Mistress Thornbriar got it named after the creek out east of town, where we first confessed our love to each other — isn’t that just the sweetest thing?)

Later, when night falls, Miss Winters will join us for the Coven Thornbriar’s regular meetings. Miss Winters reports to Mistress Thornbriar about her studies, and Mistress in turn provides Her wisdom and advice to Miss. A Witch couldn’t ask for a better Mentor than Mistress Thornbriar, Tabby, this one swears: She may be a second-year Apprentice Sorceress but She’s already dang-near running this place. She’s got contacts everywhere — students, professors, grounds staff, the school administration, even local politics, now — and made sure that Her dutiful protégée wasn’t just admitted to sorceress school, but given a ‘full-ride’ scholarship and top-of-the-line housing in the room next door to Her own. Serving Mistress Thornbriar sure is all kinds of rewarding… right, anyway! When Coven work is wrapped up for the night, the three of us usually go cool off by heading to the campus “practice room” for a non-literal spell. On paper it’s a space for sorcery exercises and spur-of-the-moment study sessions, but in practice it’s a paradise of perversity open to all who seek it. This is another thing this one’ll only hint at for now unless you ask to hear more, but Tabatha, goodness gracious, ask to hear more. The delights you can find in those parties are profound, life-changing even, and Mistress Thornbriar is consistently the Star of the show. this one’s usually got its hands full keeping the line for Her attention orderly, and occasionally needs to lay down the law when folks get too unruly. We’ve had some truly unforgettable nights, down there in that wonderland…

Eventually, of course, Mistress’ll get tired. She and this one’ll dip out of the practice room and head back upstairs for the night. We’ll get Mistress ready for bed; sometimes read to each other a little bit, sometimes just cuddle and talk. Before lights-out, Mistress Thornbriar gives this one any assignments She wants taken care of before She wakes up the next morning. Then this one kisses its Mistress good night, puts its flesh body in bed with Her, snuffs out the candles, and makes its way over to Miss Winters’s room. Oh that’s right, this one forgot to mention: throughout the day, this one’s responsible for ongoing maintenance of its backup vessel, including feeding it, washing it, keeping it in fresh, clean clothes, and working its muscles to make sure nothing gets damaged out of disuse. Most of the time that hunk of meat just remains motionless in whatever pose this one puts it in — ironically enough, behaving exactly like a non-automated doll. Isn’t that funny? It’s those little doll things.

Now at this point, Miss Winters is either back in her room or still in the defile-pile downstairs. If it’s the latter, this one pops back in to watch over Miss and escorts her to her quarters when she’s all finished (carrying her if needed; Miss Winters has been known to party hard). While Mistress Thornbriar sleeps, this one is at the sole command of Miss Winters and assists her with anything she wishes: preparing her meals, doing her chores, firmly (shall we say) encouraging her to study, or even going on our own little dates if she’s in the mood. Granted, there’s not a ton for us to do that late at night, but we’re slowly getting to know the campus’s other night owls, and Miss Winters is becoming more outgoing as time goes on. this one’s pleased as punch to be helping its Miss socially thrive; Miss’s home life in Amberfield wasn’t the healthiest situation, to put it mildly. this one’s cherished time with Miss Winters continues on until (you guessed it!) it suddenly feels that rise-and-shine needle a-calling, bids Miss Winters a fond “see you soon, darling”, and races back to its Mistress to start another great day of craftwork, science, magic, intrigue, romance, debauchery, and so much more. Dolls don’t need to sleep, Tabby: every hour of the day is this one’s to enjoy!

Becoming a doll was certainly the greatest decision this one’s benevolent Mistress made on its behalf, but there are still a few things from its past life it’s inclined to remember fondly, even if it doesn’t outright long for them much. Amberfield’s got its problems — conservative sensibilities abound, and the village chief in particular is a total jerk — but it’s still where this one was born, and there are plenty of fine folks living there who are proud to call it home. this one certainly misses you, Tabatha, and your modest fellow of a husband as well. Look at this one, getting all wistful! Guess it makes sense; Mistress Thornbriar let this one borrow its old memories and personality for the purposes of writing this letter, and they’re going back into storage after the work is done. Now, that might sound off-putting, but to be quite honest this one doesn’t much care. A doll’s mind has what its Witch says it has: nothing more, nothing less. There isn't anything so dear to it that this one would even consider asking to keep against its Mistress’s wishes. That’s absolutely pure devotion, Tabby: even the most determined human beings alive can’t get there, but this one sure did (and couldn’t be any prouder about it)!

And besides, compared to the other dolls and non-doll assistants around here, this one's living in the lap of luxury! Mistress Thornbriar turns this one’s notably popular “country charm” back on for those nightly dens of sin all the time, plus She keeps letting this one learn all kinds of new arts and crafts: on top of the incredibly handy leatherworking skills this one's picked up, it's dabbling in knitting, crochet, ceramics, a little bit of woodworking, and even some jewelrymaking (which'll sure come in handy if this one wants to one day surprise its Mistress with a pair of matching platinum rings featuring vine motifs on their surfaces and vows of eternal love inscribed on the insides. Mistress may think rings are unimpressive now, but this one’s hopeful it can change Her mind). Any proper metalworking it wants done, Mistress Thornbriar just has one of the miscellaneous low-level witches who enjoy being bossed around do under this one’s supervision — as amazing as this doll body is, brute strength is simply not its strong suit. Truly this one has it made as Mistress’s right hand! Every other person and person-shaped thing working for a Witch at this school happens to be mighty jealous of yours truly. It can even get nasty, sometimes. There’ve been harsh words, pranks, even a few instances of vandalizing this one’s doll body (no one’s stupid enough to lay a finger on the flesh one). The incidents are getting less frequent, though; Mistress Thornbriar doesn’t let insults like those go unanswered, and Mistress’s answers are brutal.

Miss Winters, meanwhile, is also getting by under Mistress Thornbriar’s protection, but is very much looking forward to the day she can truly spread her wings and fly, ideally with a dedicated doll of her own by her side. That’d sure be swell, yes indeed; Miss Winters would have daytime service, Mistress Thornbriar would get even more time and effort out of Her beloved doll, this one’d have an automaton comrade to work, play, chat, and perhaps even flirt with, if Mistress and Miss were to give their blessing… it’s just tough. Mistress Thornbriar already had this one on hand to convert into her utterly committed personal attendant, a role it had essentially been training for since birth. Miss Winters, meanwhile, doesn’t have a childhood friend of her own she can call on to do the same. The Coven Thornbriar is ready and willing to add a second doll to the team, but where in the world are we going to find a person willing to become one?

Anyways, how are you, Tabby? this one wishes from the bottom of its core that everything went as expected, and you’re the proud mother of a sweet little baby Stone. this one hopes you aren’t under the impression that it looks down on women who have gone down the better-traveled path in life; marriage to a man and motherhood weren’t right for this one, but it takes all sorts and a mama's love is one of the most precious things on this earth. Same goes for a papa’s, of course — is Mr. Stone rubbing off on his new pride and joy already? He seemed lukewarm on becoming a father when this one last spoke to him, but little ones have a way of melting our hearts with a quickness, so this one’s sure he’s more enthusiastic about it now. Tell this one all about the baby! What’s it like? Whose eyes did it get? Does it have any strong opinions about the family trade? Is the little rascal already up to mischief? Young ones aren’t allowed on campus, so this one actually hasn’t seen one in a while. Dish as much as you like, and know that this one’ll be gleefully eating it all up. Thank you in advance!

Oh, before this one forgets, it really wants to thank you for the kindness you showed it during that gloomy period last winter. During a time when hardly anyone would pay mind to it, you made a point out of bringing over tea and offering a kind word to this one every single day. Accepting that this one fully belonged to Mistress Thornbriar mind, body, and soul is what freed this one from that gloom in the end, but the warmth you shared with it helped it get to that acceptance, and for that, you have its utmost gratitude. Thank you, Tabatha Stone, truly. this one hasn’t forgotten, by the way, what you yourself confided in it during our heart-to-hearts — your nerves about Franz’s temper, fears of raising your first child improperly, concern regarding your father’s on-and-off health issues, anxiety over keeping the chandlery running as usual on top of everything else… you were pretty badly stressed out, too. this one can only hope that things have gotten more manageable, and has every confidence that you’re rising to the occasion like the determined-as-heck person it knows you to be. But on the off chance things aren’t going the way you were hoping, this one wants you to remember: you aren’t trapped. You aren’t doomed. You deserve to be happy, and you have options. Maybe those options are in Amberfield and maybe they aren’t, but what matters is that they’re real. Let this one know if there’s anything it can do for you, Tabby, and bear in mind that its offer is good for a lifetime.

Included with this letter are a trifecta of presents from the Coven Thornbriar: first up, a pair of baby booties for the little tyke’s tootsies, knitted by this one! Green’s still your favorite color, right? With the help of these little things, hopefully your kid’ll soon be feeling the same. Next, from Miss Winters, a beautiful mountain landscape for your child’s bedroom, painted by the young virtuoso herself. She used the hills nearby as visual reference. Breathtaking stonework, wouldn’t you say? And last but not least, a fine, hefty candle from Mistress Thornbriar! Yep, this one remembered you asking Her for a deluxe candle of your own around this time last year, and in honor of this new chapter of your life begged its Mistress to finally fulfill that request for you, at long last. Mistress Thornbriar’s candles have a scent that’s out of this world — this one recommends enjoying them for just a few seconds every day, once in the morning and once at night. That little boost’ll do you wonders, let this one tell you!

Now this one fully realizes that was an outrageous amount to read and far in excess of what’s reasonable to send a friend one hasn’t been in touch with for a while, but hopes you’ll forgive it — there was just so much great news to share. it hopes even more that you’ll send a reply, because we really should keep in touch! To sweeten the deal, any article of clothing this one can whip up for you, the hubby, or the baby is available upon your request, no compensation necessary. this one’s got plenty of time, an abundance of materials, ample expertise, and a powerful appreciation for your companionship. Regularly exchanging letters would truly bring this one joy, Tabatha: what do you say? Oh, and make sure to hold onto the wax seal this letter came with, too! Mistress Thornbriar sets those Herself, and has a real knack for their aesthetics. The spool of thread on this letter’s seal is Her signature, but She’s got all kinds of designs at the ready for you in future correspondence. Showing off this one’s collection of fancy wax gewgaws to other folks is a real kick; it highly recommends you follow suit!

It’s been great reaching out to you, Tabby. Write this one back soon?

Your friend,

a doll who used to be a smith

(property of Sorceress Carmilla Thornbriar)

P.S. this one hopes it goes without saying, but please don’t share the contents of this letter with anyone else. Mistress Thornbriar’s parents in particular are determined to ruin the miraculous life we three have built together if they can, and we certainly won’t offer them occasion to try. Frankly, our relatives had their goshdarned chance — Mr. and Mrs. Thornbriar, Grandma and Mr. Smith, and Auntie Winters all could have had lasting, positive relationships with their daughters if they were only willing to grant us a meaningful amount of control over our own lives. That was clearly too much to ask of them, sure, but we’re not going to be the ones to suffer for it. These two Witches and their sworn servant are beyond lucky to live with and love each other; anyone who would dare interfere with what we have as a family had better think twice. We humbly appreciate you protecting our happiness, Tabatha: you’re a doll.