the words tumbled out last time like a reflex, like her magic turned all your secrets to angry bees and skittish kittens and in the spirit of jelly coopurration they teamed up to find the shortest sweetest way out, and--
i'll be a good girl please don't i'lldoanythingyouaski'llbeagoodgirlipromise
panic pounded in your ears and your heart sank and--
r e m e m b e r
you think you got away. (you hope?)
[a thousand-toothed smile. 'here you are again.']
the next words don't come nearly as easy. meek half-excuses like you know you won't rules-lawyer your way out of a promise to something made of them just as surely as you know you have to try
"those were just--"
"I didn't know what I was--"
"that's not fair...!"
the i'm-not-a-girl-OBviously catches halfway and all you have left is this look, desperate and defeated and pleading and she just
peers. (eyes the color of lovers' initials in tree bark.)
smiles. (her lipstick's 'blood on parchment.')
"would you like to be?"
no! you wouldn't! at all! ever!
[you feel yourself nod anyway, timid and halting. maybe....she's controlling you. maybe she made you nod. so--soyouhaven't--it's not betrayal, you're just--]
you're not shaking 'cos honesty's terrifying you're just--you're resisting, CLEARLY you're resisting, and you're losing, a-andthat'sfine! because!
if you're just too weak to fight, then
you haven't abandoned your duty. right?
"Be a good girl and sink for me?"
there's a flutter in your chest and fluff in your head and as your eyelids sag your last clear thought is--