CW Recollection of trauma. Mention of violent injury. Mention of blood and running out of air in space.

Side-Chapter 1: An Unexpected Awakening

Jaxx breathed in the air of Angel’s Tear station, the putrid air was laced with the traces of metallic, acidic and probably carcinogenic chemicals. The lights seemed to only display the poverty of the human built side of the station. They’d seen the much more elegant and excessive design of the Affini quarter which was slowly claiming the station as a whole. Seems typical for the Affini to slowly absorb what was Terran out there and twist it into an image of their perverse selves, this is the reason that Jaxx had fought in the rebellion, for a free terra, and why they weren’t sure they could continue fighting.

Stepping off the ship with Jewel beside them was an oddly cathartic experience. Here they would have a few hours of glorious freedom… ironic that said freedom came with the affini as their unwitting hosts. They could talk, say what they needed to say, come to terms with their life as it stood in this time, and the one spanner thrown into that plan was… the person they knew they loved, Jewel. Where Jaxx was loyal to the idea but running down like a time worn battery, Jewel seemed to only grow stronger in her hatred of the affini.

Jaxx couldn’t sustain that. They were too tired, too lost in the knowledge that the rebellion has already all but lost, and they couldn’t live any more with the pretending. Spit and shit the pretending. It wasn’t enough for the captain and their gang of sycophants and zealots to work, you had to do it with a smile on your face and a curse to the affini on your dehydrated lips because they requisitioned the ship’s water ration for showers. It was all a lie so they wouldn’t find themselves on the wrong end of the airlock.

And yet they still played the part of a patriotic and proud rebel when trying to talk about Jewel. They wanted to just make a run for it and hide out in some corner of the station as a vagrant, away from rebel and affini eyes, free from all this bullshit. But if they didn’t convince Jewel to come with them then Jewel would be vented, and if Jewel tried to take them back to the ship after telling them they wanted to leave this all behind… there’s no way they wouldn’t get vented at a minimum.

Fuck.

While officially Jewel and Jaxx weren’t allowed to fraternise, there were knowing looks and nods that spoke of a deep, unspoken romance that’d bloomed between the two, and that love was tying them down; that love was tying them to a war they were too exhausted to fight and thoroughly sick of pretending they wanted. So up stayed the mask of patriotism trying to disguise itself, two layers of masking for double the cognitive dissonance.

For their love they continued this charade, walking around with a fake boisterous energy, reminiscing over when Jewel drank a keg of beer in the naval academy and kicking trash. Even so they realised that Jewel wasn’t like her normal self. Jaxx knew she had periods where she was so stressed out from work she would appear completely consumed by depression, unable to remember even Jaxx’s name. Irritable and fatalistic. People started calling her Juniper or June or whatever when she was having a bad time.

“Of course I did, it was half a keg!” Jewel snapped, confirming Jaxx’s suspicions, she was in a very bad way right now. They hoped it may be just the right time to make her see that they just had to make a run for it, get as far away from rebel and affini as possible, but even then it’d take some coaxing, Jaxx knew.

“Are you ok, Jewel? Are people calling you fucking June or Juniper again?” they asked as they took a step forward. Jewel looked Jaxx in the eyes.

Jewel started, clearly trying to come up with something to express what was going through her head. “I… I’ve been thinking a lot, about everything, about us, about if I can keep the ship going any more and… I…” Whatever it was, it sounded like Jewel had been thinking of it for a while, even the implacable Jewel was starting to talk about inevitability… Stars in heaven, is this their shot?

Suddenly Jewel’s eyes seemed to brighten in comprehension. “Into that alley” she whispered, pushing Jaxx against a wall with surprising speed as their lips pressed. The suddenness of it all caught Jaxx completely off guard, making them struggle for a second before comprehension dawned. Oh sweet merciful stars how they’ve longed for this moment. Jaxx was too focused on the kiss they almost didn’t see the affini walking past. Fuck it, if it means they get to kiss their crush who the fuck cares? That affini doesn’t look like they give a flying fuck.

As their lips parted, Jaxx looked Jewel in the eye, emotion welling up as a horizon worth of possibility presented itself before them.

“I… I… thanks,” is all they could muster, looking left then right just in case someone was snooping in. “Were you planning that?” they asked, savouring the afterglow of it all.

“Yeah…” Jewel replied as she reached for something. The concerning expression returned. Jaxx mentally begged whatever deity exists that Jewel wasn’t going to do something stupid. “I’m sorry for the next part of the plan.” she said. Oh fuck that’s not a good sign that’s not a good sigh that’S NOT A GOOD SIGN.

“Sorry?” Jaxx asked, confused, honestly about to shit their pants scared. “Sorry for wha-” is all they could say before pain lit up across their entire body like fire, their vision turning white then black as they plunged into the darkness behind the conscious world.

They felt a prick in the side of their neck after some length of time, plunging them into a new kind of darkness.

Their eyes opened slowly. Everything felt soft, from the bedding to the air itself as it softly blew across their face. Every breath was laced with the floral scent of… of… some combination of plants, whatever it was, it was worryingly relaxing for Jaxx. Their last memory was of being attacked with a stun gun by… FUCK.

They tried to slowly open their eyes to no great success. Whatever light that came pouring in from the world beyond was bright and jagged to the mind, forcing the lids shut in just a moment as comprehension of a fucking rotten headache bloomed with a fresh pulse of pain. Impulsively they groaned from the discomfort, eliciting a sudden flurry of quiet but sharp noises like leaves rustling in some of the old holovids they watched back at the home station. Leaves now that was a luxury space hags and trogs like themselves never had access to.

A cold feeling slowly spread from their neck and wrists, dousing their headache but also plunging them back into that new darkness they were becoming intimately familiar with.

The next time Jaxx’s mind seemed to surface from the welcoming pitch black there was more noise. Before they were in a silent room most likely, with only the rustling of leaves to…

FUCK

Ok, they thought to themselves, unless you’ve gone completely off the rails which does feel like a distinct possibility, you’ve been captur- FUCK they realised suddenly as their mind slowly drew together the chain of events leading up to being here. What’s Jewel done now? they wondered with a mixture of frustration and terror at the idea of Jewel running off to fight every affini on the station bare handed. Oh spit and shit and fuck me, they realised.

A crushing revelation had spread across Jaxx’s mind, it all made terrible sense. It all made terrible, terrible sense, and Jaxx had been so blindsided by their own wish to desert that they must have missed some damned obvious sign that Jewel was going to do something even more stupid and the last memory Jaxx will ever have of the person they had fallen in love with was them stunning them with- who even had a stun gun still on the Planar Abyssal? Those were only owned by the enforcers and Doc Coffin!

The sensation of something touching Jaxx’s chest caused them to yelp in surprise, fear, and the shock of just how beautifully relaxing and pleasurable that simple contact was. Still unable to open their eyes really they tried to comprehend what just hit, or rather softly touched, them and why it was so shockingly disarming. Some form of language emanated from their side, muted and incomprehensible that took Jaxx a second to even realise was language.

Given no real other way to interact with the world with their limbs totally powerless and their eyes still cemented shut, Jaxx groaned, slowly rolling their head from side to side. Another burst of language, a reply from a more familiar type of voice from the other side of wherever they were laying. It sounded terran. At least they wouldn’t be alone for whatever was coming Jaxx hoped.

Another sudden contact with whatever it was, this time pulling eyelids open and flashing a bright light into one eye then the other, blinding Jaxx again, even so there was enough to see the outline of a tentacle? a vine? a tentavine? a vineacle? something like that. Regardless - it was not a good sign for Jaxx’s health, that was certain.

Another suite of pricks at Jaxx’s neck and wrists as coolness spread through their body again, the jaws of that terrifying yet comforting darkness quickly overtaking them.

When they emerged from the dark this time, Jaxx was able to do so with eyes wide open, taking a deep ragged breath as the world suddenly flooded in unexpectedly. As their brain actually started to process the new, slightly muted and softened sensations of the world around them, they found themselves in a beautifully soft bed in a dim but not dark room furnished like a nice hotel you’d see in the holoads.

Looking around rapidly was not a good idea but they did so anyway, a figure in one of the room’s corners moving just enough to catch their eye even as dizziness caught up with Jaxx, causing them to flop their head back down into the pillow as the world spun. A chair creaked a little as the figure in the corner stood up, slowly walking into the light.

Blinking rapidly to try and gain a little bit of spatial composure back, Jaxx realised the other being with them was a fellow Terran. Ok, a little bit of a relief there… as long as they weren’t a rebel they supposed. Or would it be better if they were a rebel and this was some secret rebel hospital who’d saved them? That’d be goodish, though probably it’d mean they’d be pressed back into the fight. Fuck they just wanted to escape this damn rebellion they couldn’t handl-

“Wakey wakey,” the terran said with a soft genuine tone that matched their delicate smile and slightly glazed over eyes. In that moment Jaxx was disarmed. Probably the affini who captured her then. Or the rebellion had stopped caring about taking drugs on duty. So, a 50/50 split. “You’ve been out for a couple days, friend. How’re you feeling?” they asked again with that pleasant voice.

Jaxx licked their lips, swallowing as they tried to form words. “What- Where- Who?” they tried to ask. The other terran’s smile grew a little in sympathy, pressing a hand to Jaxx’s cheek.

“You were stunned quite badly by one of your crewmates. Enough of a shock for us to put you in hospital for a few days to help de-fry your brain. The limiter chip in the thing looked like it was either badly degraded or intentionally bypassed.” they said, that voice so sympathetic and pleasant, but with some edge that hadn’t quite been filed down. Comprehension was slowly forming in the back of Jaxx’s mind, even if they didn’t quite recognize it yet.

“Wh…where am I?” Jaxx asked, “Where’s Jewel?” the terran’s smile darkened a little in sympathy.

“The one you were with?” the other Terran had asked. Jaxx nodded.

“Still in the hospital. They were in quite a bad shape physically and mentally. Ran through the hospital like a madwoman, managed to escape the hospital momentarily which is an unusual achievement.” that made Jaxx’s heart stop for a second. If they were in a rebel hospital, who knows what cover it could blow, would that be an execution worthy offense to the rebels here? “We were able to get her back into her bed, but she’s still in a delicate position.”

That’s a relief at least, Jaxx thought as realization seemed to bloom. Looking a little closer now that their eyes weren’t so fuzzy and twisting from the dizziness they noticed the soft, strikingly coloured clothing the terran was wearing, the glazed eyes, the hint of a scar on the side of their neck when they turned to look at something. Stars in heaven…

“Are… am I-” they tried to start, fumbling over their words as comprehension. The Terran seemed to catch Jaxx’s recognition, smiled, and nodded. Jaxx deflated. “I’ve been captured by the Affini, haven’t I?” they asked, their hopes quickly dashed. They pushed their head back onto the pillow before instinctively grabbing for the back of their neck, hoping they weren’t about to feel the tell-tale scar of the cursed affini biotech. Thankfully it seemed like they hadn’t implanted Jaxx in their sleep.

“That you have been, Jaxx” the other terran said, their voice and face looking less darkened by sad sympathy than before.

“How do you know my name?” Jaxx asked, concerned.

“Well, when your friend zapped you and defected, they let us know what ship you were from. When we cracked the ship database we saw your name next to a photo of you as well, but really we first knew because we read your name tag,” they said, pointing to the naval jumpsuit Jaxx was still clothed in. oh ha ha Jaxx bitterly noted, as the realization of what had happened hit just a moment later.

“Wait… what the fuck did you just say?” Jaxx asked. “Are you saying that Jewel of all people fucking defected?” they asked, guarding their tone and moving a little away from their opposite.

The terran smiled and nodded a little. “It’s a long story, one that’s probably easier for my mistress to explain,” they said, sitting on the side of Jaxx’s bed while giving the rebel time to process this new turn of events. No escape now.

Jaxx sighed, looking at the Terran, their contented smile seemed as creepy as it was disarming. Like this was all just going to be a show before the Affini burst in and start doing whatever it is they do.

The two sat quiet for a while as Jaxx tried to process the bombshell and a half that had just landed square in their lap. It seemed incomprehensible, so much so that they decided the whole line of thought was probably best left to process later as they looked back up at the… pet terran. “Well… since you know my name, can I at least ask for yours?” they finally asked. Ideas about being in jail and the affini assigning a human jailor out of cruelty or some misguided attempt to disarm the situation blooming momentarily.

The terran smiled. “Of course. My name is Sylvia Monocots, third floret. They/Them” They announced with a proud smile. “Former cosmic marine and floret to Hilijan Monocots, Fifth bloom”. Of course. They had to pair Jaxx up with a pet, and that was going to mean…

“Please tell me I’m not going to have my name changed to something like… Jaxx Monocots, fourth floret,” Jaxx said semi seriously, hoping that wasn’t going to be the case. Sylvia smiled in response.

“Don’t be silly” they said, bringing a brief relief to Jaxx for just a moment. “Mistress already filed the paperwork to do that days ago,” they proudly said.

Ah fuck.

Meeting an affini face to face for the first time was… disorienting at the very least. While Jaxx could accept that there would be a difference between propaganda and the real article, what they got was an interesting sight.

Sylvia had taken Jaxx on a little tour of their hab, now Jaxx’s too it was very un-subtly implied. For what it was worth it was an extravagantly furnished place. Jaxx had thought their room to be like a hotel, the rest of the hab was deceptively large and even better furnished. Off to one side was the bathroom with a freaking swimming pool for a bathtub, beautifully crafted vanity and faucet, the works. Next to the bathroom a modest but slick kitchen that oozed with the same professional look as holovids of five star restaurants. A chill out room for Sylvia filled with workout equipment, comic books, role playing games, and posters of very very attractive looking athletes.

The main bedroom which Sylvia and Hilijan shared knocked Jaxx off their feet with how big it looked, with a massive bed slap bang in the middle of it, at least twice if not three times the size of the one Jaxx woke up in.

“Fuck,” Jaxx had muttered, “you affini have to be loaded to afford all this.” they said absentmindedly as they inspected everything. It’d make sense that some affini would probably hold a lot of wealth, especially if they’re some sort of medical worker. Back on home station a good medical administrator or highly coveted specialist would earn more in a week then Jaxx would during their entire cosmic navy service.

Sylvia simply smiled. “Don’t be silly. This is pretty standard by affini-” they pondered for a second to think of an appropriate word before giving up “-standards.” the implication Jaxx immediately suspected is that it’s the standards of the affini, not necessarily those in their ‘care’. The implication was noted.

The centrepiece of the whole hab was the living room, a pair of couches deep enough to easily be beds in of themselves crafted from an impossibly comfortable fabric that faced each other, with something approximating an oversized coffee table separating them that held stacks of books, a few folded up blankets and a tablet.

It was as Jaxx started to get settled in on the couch and preparing to ask some questions when the door slid open with a terrifying silence and a 12 foot tall amalgam of vines, ferns, roots, bark and all sorts of other plant matter strutted in, a somewhat disconcerting smile across a somewhat humanoid looking face. And yet she was wearing what looked to be a close approximation of a human hospital uniform, carrying a pair of bags with what looked like some snacks poking out the top.

“Hello dears,” the Affini began in the familiar not-quite-human rumbling tone that came across in the propaganda vids- “My, my,” the affini continued. Putting the bags down the affini scooped Sylvia and Jaxx up in one swift motion that caused Jaxx to yelp from the suddenness and a concerningly familiar comforting, disarming touch of the Affini on their bare skin. Oh no, that’s not good. “Sylvia, I’m guessing you’ve introduced yourself to Jaxx, am I correct, dear?” the affini asked, smiling softly towards the former marine.

Sylvia, who’s pupils had dilated considerably in the last five seconds, nodded rapidly, pleased to answer yes for their affini’s question. In response the Affini cooed gently and petted the terran on the head, vines running through their hair affectionately.

“And of course, a big welcome to you, my lovely fourth floret,” the affini said as she turned her head, smiling at Jaxx, looking them in the eye. Staring back, for a moment Jaxx just found themselves completely lost in the affini’s eyes as sensation overwhelmed them. They blinked, looking at the affini, trying to form words to express… anything? Anything.

“T…thank you, Miss M-monocots?” they asked, hoping they got the last name correct. The affini for a second looked like they were about to frown in disapproval before chuckling, pulling both Sylvia and Jaxx closer to her chest.

“That will do for now, my dearest, though I’ll have to train you to use proper terms later,” she said, winking as if to say it wouldn’t be a serious matter. “Now, how is my loveliest new ward doing? What do you think of all this?” she asked.

“It… it’s good” Jaxx replied after a second, realizing they’d been drawn into some form of mental halting whenever the affini spoke. Words that would have rationally come off as slightly condescending instead came off as calming and captivating. They blinked and shook their head to try and think more clearly. “I’m honestly… shocked at how luxurious this place is, it’s like a hotel I’d never be able to afford in my entire lifetime… three lifetimes. And you just live in it like a regular flat?”

“Of course, my dear. It’d be pointlessly cruel if we didn’t provide all with suitable accommodations.” the Affini replied. Of course, Jaxx thought, fighting through the daze that came with the Affini’s speech, for all affini was what she surely meant. “Whatever I own, dear, you own. Well, apart from you and dearest Sylvia,” she said with a wink. Great, Jaxx was property now, of course that part of the rebel propaganda was true.

“And…” Jaxx started, trying to find a way to word the next probe very very carefully.

“And what, dear?” the affini asked. “There’s no reason to hide your thoughts from me~”

“And what if I don’t want to be your… floret. What if I just want to go on my way and pretend the years of hell I had to endure on the Planar Abyssal were all a fucked up dream, that I’m just some quiet non-intrusive terran citizen of your empire who was never involved in anything.” Jaxx started, shrinking a little as they tried to dodge offending the affini, cursing themselves for using ‘empire’. The affini were probably convinced enough by their own propaganda to see that as an insult.

Contrary to Jaxx’s expectation of wrathful indignation, the affini’s leave softly rustled, her smile softening as she sat down with the two terrans in… hand? body? She stroked Jaxx for a long time as she tried, and clearly failed to come up with an answer. It was obvious even for Jaxx to see.

“It’s a question that will have to be answered at another time. The situation is… complicated. A good number of your fellow crewmates will have to be domesticated for their own safety and that of those around them. It’s not a satisfying answer, you could even call it a cop out, but it’s currently above my head.”

“Then why have you-” Jaxx started as pinpricks followed by a sudden chill that suddenly flooded their system. Fuck is this affini just going to fUCKINg drug them… whenever…they ask…questionnnnns?

Jaxx woke up in the same bed. Sitting in the corner with a tray of food sat Sylvia. Great… wait.

Looking at Sylvia with the lights brighter than before Jaxx realised that the former marine’s legs looked… very much not like human ones. In fact they looked like flower coated wooden approximations of human legs. How the hell didn’t they notice that glaring detail before? Sylvia had already stood up to bring the tray of food to Jaxx, it smelt nice, but it was obvious Jaxx was paying attention to Sylvia’s carefully wrought prosthetics.

Rather than awkwardly moving like peg-legs they acted as fluidly and effortlessly as any baseline human’s, small bundles of vines sprawling behind the wooden plates, contracting and stretching like muscle fibres. Sylvia easily caught on as they placed the tray onto Jaxx’s lap, sat onto the bed, and extended their legs to make them easier for Jaxx to see.

“How did yo-” Jaxx stammered, torn between the smell of the food and the legs “What ha- did the affini do that to you?” they asked in both amazement and horror, rumours of the affini using terrans for medical experiments crashing suddenly into their thoughts.

Sylvia smiled softly. “No, well, partially no. The legs are affini built, gifted to me when they first took me in. The people responsible for me needing artificial legs are exclusively Terran,” they started, looking up as if recalling a memory. “There’s a story to it… if you wouldn’t mind me waxing on a little,” they said softly. Jaxx nodded.

“Right.” Sylvia started, looking Jaxx in the eye, the glazed over look of their eyes dissipating in an instant. “Well. It’s from when I was a cosmic marine,” they started, cracking their knuckles exaggeratedly. “After the fall of Terra and the signing of the human domestication treaty I was on one of the ships that had decided to denounce the treaty, the CNS Valkyrie.” The name immediately felt familiar. “We had linked up with the CNS Pegasus and a few smaller ships, the plan was that we were going to ambush an affini ship and open up with everything we had. I was ordered to lead a strike team onto the ship to see if we could capture an affini or…” They frowned regretfully. “…or abduct some florets for interrogation and, knowing the rebels, execution.” they shook for a moment, seeming to imagine what it’d have looked like.

For Jaxx that was all they needed to realise why they recognized the ship name. “You… you know the Planar Abyssal took part in that battle, right. You’re talking about the battle of epsilon-garmon, right?” they asked with sudden clarity. The whole thing had failed spectacularly and it seemed like the Planar Abyssal was the largest ship to escape.

Sylvia nodded. “I was on an assault craft. We were hoping that if we threw up enough fire, decoys and put enough power into broadcasting jamming signals that the Affini wouldn’t notice the assault craft until we’d hit the deck and had subdued a few captives,” they started, memory flicking across their face, twitches as their eyes went dull in memory, the prosthetics reflexively tensing.

“What… what happened?” they asked. Sylvia sighed with a sad smile, looking into Jaxx’s eyes.

“Unfortunately, the plan was malformed. By then affini agents had already picked up on the operation and made their own sabotage and it was too effective.” They started, biting their lower lip. “With all the jamming and electronic warfare crap, it overwhelmed the gun batteries of both the Valkyrie and Pegasus. Their computers went haywire, and a flak shell went on a direct collision course with my transport…” their voice hitched. “When I regained my senses, I was floating in the void, watching the battle go down, my legs ruined by the explosion, like they were bleeding bad, completely torn up. Now I was still in a pressure suit and it kept me from instantly dying, but there were enough puncture holes so that my oxygen was running out fast.”

Jaxx couldn’t even think of how to respond. How could you when someone was just so readily laying out this… this whole series of events. Reliving the horror of finding yourself floating in space bleeding to death and running out of air.

“Y-you don’t need to tell me any more of it if you don’t want to” Jax said softly. Sylvia looked at them, they smiled and nodded.

“Sorry.” they started. “Sometimes I just get… lost in that memory, I’m better at it now, especially when Mistress is around. Hers was the first thing I saw when I woke up.” they smiled, and in that smile Jaxx realised the question they always struggled to find an answer to. How could someone come to love an affini. In Sylvia’s eyes, they found the answer.

A few minutes passed, the two looking at each other momentarily but avoiding eye contact, Jaxx slowly ate the food. It was fantastic, but with Sylvia’s story, even they were too weighed down by their recollection to comment. It’d feel like a farce that’d detract from the weight of horror Sylvia experienced.

“What happened, Jaxx. On the Planar Abyssal?” they asked, Jaxx grimaced.

“I don’t want to talk about it right now,” Jaxx replied. Silence filling the air again.

The next few days were comparatively quiet. With the knowledge of their inevitable domestication weighing them down Jaxx decided the best thing to do was speak as little as possible. It was all predetermined anyways, probably the reason why the affini hadn’t lashed out at them for disobedience and their obvious attempts to stay out of any conversation. So instead the mechanic simply lay in bed all day, thinking and failing to think of a plausible way to get out of this whole ordeal. Nothing would come of it. Damnit, they knew if they could think of it, the Affini would have had it on lockdown.

The door opened and Sylvia walked in, carrying lunch on a tray. Jaxx smiled sadly. A part of them envied Sylvia. When you’d gone through something actually traumatic, then becoming bonded to your saviour makes sense. All Jaxx had was hiding in a hole and being stunned by the person they truste- no Jaxx they chided themselves, don’t try to diminish the hell of that place. Thoughts whirred around their mind as Sylvia softly placed the tray onto their lap. Pancakes with maple syrup and a side of eggs. Sylvia knew how to get to jaxx’s heart via the stomach. In one of the brief conversations they’d had, Jaxx reminisced about having had pancakes back at the naval academy with Jewel, since then all the food Jaxx had was pancakes with a side of something different.

“How’re you holding up?” Sylvia asked, softly resting the tray on Jaxx’s lap. Jaxx murmured. Thinking over what’d been running through their mind. Fuck it… but later. Not now.

“Nothing much,” Jaxx replied, sounding more exhausted than they felt. “Usual.” they continued, not making eye contact with Sylvia. “Still need some alone time?” Sylvia asked with a soft, knowing smile.

“Yeah.” Jaxx lied. Fuck why couldn’t they just say the truth?

“That’s ok,” Sylvia smiled again, fuck that smile was just too sincere. A pang of guilt ran through Jaxx. For fuck’s sake Jaxx. At least give them the dignity of not lying to them. As they turned to walk back out Jaxx felt it all well up.

“Sylvia… no I- I want to talk. About.” Sylvia stopped in their tracks, turning to look at Jaxx with a mixture of concern and sincerity. “I feel… you’ve laid out something traumatic to me… I should at least do you the favour of letting you know what happened on the planar abyssal… I can’t go into detail, but,” they started, Sylvia nodded.

“I’ve overheard Mistress and her friend, Miss Rimu, talking obliquely about what happened. It sounded like a horror show from what I could gather.”

Jaxx pursed their lips. “When I joined the rebellion. When the mutiny happened, I thought that we had a shot. I believed in Terra, I believed humans are best when we are free, and I told myself we’d fight for our freedom ’til the death.” A memory slinked it’s way into Jaxx’s mind. The old man, beaten up, stripped and in the airlock. “Then the executions started. They started and they never stopped. News of public stabbings of domesticated terrans and futile last stands, all in the name of our freedom filtered back to us.” Jaxx swallowed. “Executions had become commonplace on most ships we had contact with, but ours were worse. More frequent, more public. If you pissed the captain off, you’d be publicly beaten, humiliated, and vented” they pursed their lips as the images roiled up from the subconscious.

“I’m sorry.” Sylvia whispered.

“But I’d still fight, because I knew that a life that ends in freedom would be better than the poverty and slavery the Affini were sure to do to us. Why else would they fight us if they didn’t want to plunder our worlds for what they had?” Words damned and heretical, began to emerge. “But I don’t know if what we did… if it was worth it.” they continued. In for a penny, in for a pound. It’s not like the captain would be able to do anything about what they think now. “I still believe humans are best when we’re free. I believe humanity would be better if your affini hadn’t bowled in here and changed everything without giving us a choice.” Jaxx took a breath in. “But if you were to ask me now, would I still have wanted to fight for the rebellion knowing what I know now. I’d tell you to fuck off. Freedom isn’t worth massacring the innocent, it’s not worth trying to terror bomb your way to victory. It’s not worth waking up every day dreading that it would be your last.”

Sylvia sat on the bed next to Jaxx, offering their hand in comfort. “I was a die hard like you were,” they said after a moment, looking Jaxx in the eyes. Stars and shit, their eyes looked beautiful with those affini clothes. “Before… Epsilon-Garmon I was as zealous and implacable as you’d expect from a marine. No compromise, only fighting.” they trailed off. “But when the execution fever hit the Valkyrie I was starting to feel the doubt unravelling the idea I’d decided to build myself around. The pride, the loyalty, the fear I’d end up penniless and abandoned in the new world the Affini were forging.” they quietly smiled “Come, Jaxx. I have something to show you.” they said, extending a hand to Jaxx as they stood up. “You need the exercise anyway, lazy bum.” they giggled.

Getting used to walking more than a few meters while clearly on at least a little bit of Xenodrugs was an unexpected challenge for Jaxx. Thankfully Sylvia was there to help them keep steady as they walked through the Affini section of the station. Nice and slow.

Even as they walked, Jaxx noticed how even here those who were obviously florets mingled with affini and those who clearly weren’t. Nobody seemed to take precedence in moving out of the way for each other, everything just flowed with a slow meaningful pace. It was almost enough for Jaxx to stop and people watch for a little bit as everyone seemed to dance their own dances, but the insistent tug of Sylvia on their wrist kept them from stopping to watch. All fair enough, Jaxx supposed.

When they however reached the boundary between the Affini and Terran built areas, it brought everything into a very very sharp contrast.

It was like a line had been carved into the station, a barrier that separated two extremely different worlds. Affini on one side, Terran on the other. Even so, a large number of affini could be seen all over the place, though mostly without their florets. Working on buildings, carrying building supplies, paint, everything but the kitchen sink… no wait there was an affini carrying a new one. Even the smell had changed. Where deeper in the affini areas the place had a nice floral scent to everything, here it smelt of acrid chemicals and soot.

“You see that hab block, there?” Sylvia asked, pointing to one of the rundown terran built units the affini were working on. Jaxx nodded. “That’s where I grew up. This is my home.” they said with a little hint of hometown pride. “I grew up here to somewhat well off parents. They still live here. So we lived in the nicer parts of the station, though it’s obviously not as fancy as the real rich people places”. Sylvia turned their head to Jaxx. “It was more comfortable than the worst off places, but we still suffered from the constant smog from the factories and refineries. If you thought it smelled now… well it’d take you a while to get used to what it used to smell like.”

Jaxx nodded, trying to imagine what this area would look like coated and consumed in smog. “Sounds even worse than my home station.”

“Pretty much. One of the worst places to live in the known galaxy with a horrific death toll to boot.” Sylvia smiled grimly. “I knew when I was young… I wanted to escape this place. That’s why I signed up with the cosmic navy. Nearly didn’t pass due to the damage from all the smoke, but I got in” Sylvia turned to face Jaxx fully. “And the one goal I had was to climb the ranks. So hopefully one day I could be paid well enough to get my folks off this rock and somewhere that wasn’t actively killing them.”

“I would too if I were growing up here. What a shithole this place must have been… still looks like one now even.” Jaxx innocently smiled, hoping to have not offended their fellow. “No offence, of course.”

Sylvia shrugged with a sly smile. “None taken. It was possibly the worst place for a terran to live. All those toxic byproducts were just dumped, constantly, on a population often too poor to ever have a chance to escape. But the Affini are changing it.” Sylvia smiled. “When I first met our mistress, she asked me where I was from, and I described this place. She was shocked, horrified that such a place would exist. Next thing I know just days after my surgery we’re on a ship flying directly to here, dragging her friends Rimu and Kauri here to try make as much of a difference as they can… Kauri wasn’t very happy with it but accepted.” Sylvia continued, taking a seat on a newly built bench.

“When we arrived. It was a hell of a lot closer to how I left this place than it is now. But even then I could see what good the Affini were bringing to us all… I was able to meet my parents again” they smiled, tears welling up in their eyes. “Of course, at first they were highly suspicious of their only kid being domesticated, let alone because they were required to as part of the treaty. But our mistress persisted and won them over… even managed to help them understand the bureaucracy process so they could get treatment at home.”

“That’s….” Jaxx started, taking in what was going in around them. Realizing the implication of what was happening here, what work was being performed. If the affini were just doing this because they felt it was right. That they could afford to do all this… was it really worth fighting to keep it all going? “And it’s all free? They don’t demand payment or work to compensate the affini?”

Sylvia looked to Jaxx, tears spilling over and running down their cheeks. “I understand the pacification of humanity was a scary time, Jaxx. Because honestly, it scared me to death. And even after my implantation I held some reservations about the Affini. Like you, a part of me held out for a free terra, even when my implant tried to douse it… but being able to see my parents receive life saving treatment, for free. To see in weeks the work needed to prevent the whole tragic disaster from ever happening again. I came to realise that the affini really were here to make our existence better. That submission to them meant freedom from all the poisons our society had hoisted upon us all… That we could all be truly free.”

It was in that moment, something in Jaxx seemed to… crumble.

It’d been just over a week since Jaxx and Sylvia’s little trip to the human-built areas. In that time Jaxx had come to realise if even half of what Sylvia was saying about the affini was true, stories of vast fleets upon fleets of affini, resources more bountiful then could be used, how futile the terran resistance to the affini had been. The carefree, joyful state that Miss Hilijan’s presence induced slowly wore down Jaxx’s will to resist, something about rhythms and scents, Miss Hilijan had explained.

Jaxx had finally came to terms with their fate. Still in hopes for a free terra, some day, in some part of their mind. But their path was different now, and they’d embrace it.

With Jaxx’s implantation booked to take place a few days after their appendix surgery, they were given the chance to see Jewel again, under affini supervision. In the hospital room Jaxx looked at the… they didn’t know the word, the body that shared the mind of their lover, Jewel, and those who were in that body together with them. The sight of their unconscious lover stirred a flurry of conflicting emotions, even knowing that it wasn’t Jewel who’d brought all this upon Jaxx a twinge of resentment still emerged.

Jewel, if that’s who was closest to conscious in that mind of theirs, looked so peaceful in that medical bed- thoroughly out of it- no longer lashing out with nightmare induced jabs of arms and legs. No more of the crying in their sleep.

The affini methods for those who resisted domestication hard, means that Jaxx didn’t want to think about. Instead they hoped instead that when Jewel was next conscious, they’d be able to convince her to lay down the proverbial sword.

When their lover’s eyes opened for just a moment, a mix of emotions swelled.