It was the spring of 1985, and I must say that I did not feel the glory of the Reagan Revolution. It didn’t help that I had to give fake ID to the national park service to get this job, lest they figure out my birth sex and I end up some tabloid curiosity, but that was far less important than the budget cuts the entire service was feeling.

Olympic National Park was a wonderful place. I loved it more than anything, and I had dreamed of working here since I was a little girl, but now that I finally had the opportunity I couldn’t help but feel that the glamour of it was lost on me.

And now there are strange things afoot. Some thought it was wild bear attacks, but it was getting ridiculous… the amount of people who were going missing deeper towards the more difficult trails in the park. Could it have been a bear attack? Well, at first, maybe, but now there were dozens of missing persons reports being filed. And that was not good for a place that was supposed to invite people to take part in nature and its beauty.

So yeah, austerity plus mysterious disappearances means more work for Elise. Thanks Reagan. Bastard should have stuck to cowboy movies.

Of course it was easy to target the new girl. To send her out on the more difficult trails to see if there was anything to these rumors of bear attacks. Yes, because why would I be able to outrun a grizzly bear if it came to it? It would just be another number on the tally of ‘How many people can our park kill?’

Usually there would be helicopters and a whole search team but for some reason the parks service wanted this under the table, probably in terror that we might get more budget cuts come the new fiscal year. I don’t blame them.

All I had was a hiking pack, supplies to last me a week, a revolver for self defense, and the authority of a national park ranger. Godspeed Elise Winters, don’t die!

I sighed a bit to myself as I took that fated first step onto the trail, beginning to follow deep into the forest. A part of me was ecstatic to be able to just be one with nature yet again, while the other parts of me was screaming about the fact that even a revolver might not be anything against a bear or god forbid, anything else. I’ve never even shot a gun at a living thing before. Then, an invasive thought hit me: what if there was a serial killer out there? A chill ran down my spine. Hopefully just my mind jumping to a worst-case scenario.

This is old country; there were rumors of things out there you don’t wanna see. There was an old Native American man who was my direct superior, and he had stories, both his own and his tribes. I would write them off as ghost tales but they are incredibly detailed, all things considered, and honestly, I’d rather just keep the stories in mind rather than just write them offhand.

Did I believe him when he said he met a werewolf when he was twenty-five? I mean he was right about a bunch of other shit so honestly I’ll buy it. Might explain why so many people were going missing all things considered.

I took a deep breath as I walked, with my eyes closed. I really didn’t want to think about anything. It’s not like I was being sent out there to be the sole investigator; I was just there to take a peek around! So in reality, the task at hand was not too much different from my regular duties. But I did have to wonder where all of those people went. Even bear attacks left behind… bits of people: their bodies, their gear, any food and water were sometimes left behind.

Nothing. There was nothing. Like all of those missing people had packed up and vanished deeper into the woods, off of the beaten path to the places where people usually begin to starve to death after being lost for too long

If I did find something noteworthy, I could come back and do a proper search. The only problem was I got out of the ranger station late, so it was already getting dark as I made it to the first campsite.

This was not a trail for new hikers. Perhaps that was the thing that frightened me the most out of all of this. Those taking it up the difficult path were seasoned hikers and campers. Could dozens of these trained victims actually somehow screw up encountering a brown bear?

I mean, I took my training! I passed my hiking courses and PT with flying colors. I am more than ok! I could make it up and back in no time at all, be back by friday so I could watch football.

And as expected, the campsite is empty. No tents, no trash, no leftover books… Nothing, as though no one had been here for a long time. I could feel a chill run down my spine as I turned on my flashlight to give myself a bit of extra light. It felt like the sun had gone down way faster than expected. I hated days like this, where everything moved in fast forward like a VHS tape.

One might expect there to be footprints or tracks of some nature, but as I leaned down to take a closer gaze into the dirt… It looked normal. I shined my flashlight to and fro as I strolled through the campsite, the designated safe place for hikers to take up camp to rest. Once again, there was nothing of interest around. Yet, perhaps having nothing to note around was terrifying in and of itself. Things like this felt like one of those scary novels I see at the library every now and then.

The only difference was that I was the main character; my survival skills were good, sure, but… Then my flashlight stopped and focused on a tree. I felt like there was a light reflecting back at me… Trees did not reflect light, though. So I took a few tentative and curious steps forward toward the tree to get a closer look.

It was a shelf fungus. But not like any shelf fungus I had ever seen before. While I was no expert in polypores, or any fungus for that matter… It looked unworldly. Not only had it reflected my light back at me, on closer inspection there was nothing about it that looked like a reflective surface. It was a deep black color, almost wet in texture. When I moved my flashlight away from it, it glowed a deep green like a glow in the dark sticker.

“What are… What are you?” I asked myself aloud, as I leaned closer into it. I turned my head a bit and moved my line of sight to another tree. The one right across from it was also sporting the same fungus. “Holy shit…”

I knew not to breathe in the spores of an unknown fungus, that was a good way to die, but I had never seen anything like it. I didn’t want to take a sample without a respirator, so instead I took out my notebook and began describing everything I could about it.

“Did they breathe this stuff in? No, that wouldn’t have made them leave en masse like this.” I heard a rustling noise not too far away. Then it stopped. Nothing. Maybe I was growing paranoid. I never liked being out in the dark for long periods of time; too many scary movies did that to you.

I could have sworn I saw a shimmer of the same bright green, but it vanished into the treeline as quickly as I looked away. Probably just more fungus.

There wasn’t much I could do going further for the night. I looked up at the sky, and any sign of the sun was long gone. There was just the crescent of a moon beginning to appear taller and taller. I took a deep breath once I had walked away from the trees and found my way to a safer area to begin unloading my pack. My concept of time seemed to be getting away from me. It tended to happen when I had a late start.

The scent of the fungus was somewhat sweet, tantalizing, I became somewhat worried the fungus might draw in bears or other wildlife but that was a rather silly thought. It was spring, they weren’t getting ready to hibernate yet. I would be fine.

The tent was slowly pitched, I lit a camp stove and ate my dinner, and I realized as time went on that my concerns were more and more ridiculous.

The fungus wasn’t going to harm me, even if it was strange and bioluminescent. It was just a fungus, a friendly fungus.

As I sat down by the flames, I withdrew an old and aging paperback to keep myself entertained before I went to sleep. I wondered where the fungus came from. There was something fascinating about it that caught my attention. I had never seen anything like it at all, but then again… it was just a weird thing growing out of a tree. Maybe I needed to think less about that and more about getting through the night.

The sounds of the night were nice though. I could hear the slight breeze rustling through the trees, the sounds of animals off in the distance who had no interest in me, and the song of insects in the night. I closed up my book after a while, crawling back into my tent and zipping it shut as I curled into my sleeping bag. The exhaustion that I had apparently been feeling hit me like a bus, and I knew it was time.

Then as I drifted off to sleep, a new song seeped in. It was chaotic, cacophonous, but oh so intimate.

A new friend.

So, so lost.

Welcome home~

I woke up feeling wonderful. I felt more rested than I had in years. I felt as if I had been massaged by hundreds of diligent hands who had found all of my most sensitive spots and gently coaxed relaxation out of me. That was an accomplishment.

As I peeked my head out back into the morning glow, I felt far more invigorated to begin my search than I had been the prior day. Something in my head was just screaming at me to head deeper into the forest, that I knew I would find something today. I giggled a bit at how excitable I felt, normally I was not a morning person in the slightest. At least, not before several cups of coffee found their way into me.

I packed everything up with excitement, throwing dirt over my fire, packing my tent and sleeping bag and preparing to head out into the forest.

It was like being in another world. The trail had been blocked off since the disappearances, so I was, for all intents and purposes, the only intelligent being on these trails. I wondered what the others were thinking when they vanished. Was it a sudden occurrence? Maybe they ran into something that made them run on the trail. That would have explained quite a bit about how perfectly cleaned up the campsite was. Maybe they had made their way back onto the trail?

As I made my way forward instances of the strange black fungus became more and more common, it’s sweet smell becoming all encompassing. It was pleasant honestly. It was strange to find a fungus that smelled like flowers.

Did fungus grow in multiple places like that? Most were on the trees, but mushrooms were beginning to creep into the dirt. Strange, I knew for a fact there was a difference between mushrooms and polypores, at the very least. They were all fungi, yes, but this… for a brief moment I expected to feel another odd chill down my back, but it never arrived. Rather, a sense of comfort ran over me.

That’s right. There was nothing to worry about. It was just a silly little fungus that could never hurt you unless you ate it. And why would I ever eat a weird wet mushroom that was growing everywhere? I snorted at how ridiculous one would have to be to eat something so clearly dangerous.

That could be dangerous! The Mushrooms were my friend, they probably kept the bears away. I let out a little giggle as I moved forward. I felt so floaty and nice. I hadn’t felt this good since I had smoked weed with that girl in college.

I smiled widely as I saw something off the beaten path. It looked like the mushrooms were making a little path into the forest! Like they were having a good time.

It was weird that the mushrooms seemed to follow the path laid out by the park service so perfectly. It was almost like they respected the US government but… why would they do that? Mushrooms couldn’t think. That was silly.

Tilting my head in curiosity, I decided to follow the mushrooms for a brief detour. It wasn’t like I would get lost. I was a park ranger, after all! I just would turn around once I found out where the mushrooms were going. Of course, I couldn’t step on them that would be mean to them.

Wait mushrooms can’t go anywhere. The Mushrooms were so nice to lead me down an interesting path. I giggled as I followed along. I wondered if they could tell me where all the people went. It would make my life so much easier knowing where those silly girls went off to!

Weren’t some of them boys? It was kinda weird that everyone who went missing was a girl. Probably just random chance.

But I guess it didn’t matter. Once I knew what happened I could go back… And a great sadness washed over me like someone had just kicked my in the shin. I didn’t want to leave my new friends…!

The mushrooms would get lonely if I left! Maybe I could come back to visit sometimes? I still had my job. Then the mushrooms wouldn’t get lonely.

It seemed like the mushrooms were having me go all over! Each step took me deeper and deeper, where every tree was filled with the fungus and all the grass was replaced with mushrooms! It was cool to see my friends everywhere watching me to make sure I was…

I shook my head slightly, and looked around a bit. Wait… Where… Where the hell had I gone? My hand reached up to my eyes and I rubbed them hard. This… Had I somehow gotten myself lost?

Eventually though the trees gave way, and in a bright clearing there was a beautiful woman. Mushrooms were emerging from all over her. She was gorgeous. Her white hair framing her face perfectly and her glowing green eyes pierced into me, seeing the real me.

“W… who are you?” I tried to hold back a blush as I stared at the odd woman. Something about her very aura was hypnotic, as though one more look into her eyes would spell doom for me.

She walked up to me, cupping my face and touching her nose to mine. “Hi there, are you lost?”

“N… No! Of course not. I’m a park ranger investigating the missing hikers.” I wanted to die, this was so embarrassing and also made me feel so many emotions.

Her breath smelled like the mushrooms, sickly sweet and ever alluring. She was clearly friendly. Why did her spit glow green. I felt myself heat up as her warmth pressed against me.

“Oh, don’t worry dear, we aren’t missing. We’re all right here. You seem lost though. Are you sure you aren’t lost?” She said grinning.

“What?” I asked rather bluntly. I backed away from her. “No, I am not lost.” I doubled down on the lie. “And you’re one of the missing hikers? Where are the rest of them?”

“We’re right here.” She said tilting her head. “Isn’t it obvious?”

“You are one woman.” I pointed out the obvious. “Did something happen? Did you hit your head?”

“Nothing happened. We are right here.”

Oh. That made sense. They were right there. She wouldn’t lie to me. Except she is clearly lying to me. Where are the rest of them.

“Well clearly something happened. Dozens of people don’t go missing over the course of two weeks and just be fine.” I responded, ignoring the parts of me that really wanted to believe her. They were extremely overwhelming thoughts, and I believed myself wrong for even thinking she could be lying to me. Why would this woman ever lie to me? She seemed like she was a very honest lady.

“We aren’t lost. You are.” She said, climbing into my lap, her scent and touch causing me to get embarrassingly hard, tightening my pants.

“W-What are you doing?” I stammered, really hoping nothing unseemly happened while she sat on me.

She giggled as I felt tendrils hands run over my breasts eliciting a shiver of delight.. “You are a friend, a lost friend! Let us show you the way.”

She kissed me on the lips, and her tongue slid into me, it was long, dextrous, and sweet, very very normal.

I felt pleasure flood into me at the kiss, I relaxed into her as my vision began to fog up.

Follow us, new friend.

You don’t have to be lost anymore.

Follow us!

I woke up right before nightfall, right at the second campsite along the trail. The mushrooms were everywhere here, providing more than enough illumination to see even without a campfire. I shuddered at the overwhelmingly sweet scent before trying to put together my thoughts.

Fuck, had I passed out? Was that woman who was… doing things to me just a hallucination? I looked at the fungus once more and grimaced. My hands shakingly went up to my throat. Had I… been breathing in this fungus the entire time? No wonder it felt like I was losing my mind… Perhaps these little guys were loaded up with hallucinogenic spores. Maybe all of the missing people had been affected by it and that’s why they went missing.

I had to head back tomorrow. There was no way I was making it much further without a respirator to get out those- No I didn’t need a respirator. I would be fine. I was well trained. Plus I needed to let my friends in clear my head

But I had to go back! Had to warn people that the trail was infested! If anyone else made their way back up here they… they might fall victim to whatever this was too! Not… not like that would be a bad thing though.

But the mushrooms were my friends… I couldn’t have them removed… I couldn’t do that to them! They were… I looked down at my hands and rubbed my face, only to notice that my veins were glowing green looking extremely normal.

“Oh… Oh my god…” I mumbled, giggling slightly at my arms. Those small giggles soon broke out into an uproarious laughter. My palms… My fucking palms were covered in the spores. It was rooting into my veins showing me the way! I wouldn’t be lost forever! I would be safe soon! And that made me giggle even harder, kicking my legs slightly.

I was glad the fungus was so friendly, otherwise- No! I… I god what was happening to me… I didn’t have time for this. I would rest and head back tomorrow. Hopefully I still had enough mental faculties to do that by then.

Could I rest though? The thought suddenly crossed my mind. What if I woke up and had gone completely insane? Would I ever be able to survive this? What if these spores put me into a permanent state of some sort of hallucinogenic psychosis? Made me super happy?!

The mushrooms wouldn’t do that though. They were my friend. They wouldn’t harm me at all. I loved them. They loved me. And that was all I needed from now on.

Come find us tomorrow, new friend.

I giggled as I laid out my sleeping bag on the bare ground, slithering into it like a cocoon of some sort. I didn’t want something like a tent getting in between me and my friends. That would be rude. I might get lost again if I did that. And getting lost was no good at all!

I woke up, I was lost again, I knew the way. My friends were showing me. It was still night, but I didn’t need the sun. My friends were glowing, pulsing so as to show a path through the woods. I abandoned everything I didn’t need. I didn’t need it anymore. All I needed was my friends, for they were all that mattered in the world.

The only things left on me were my clothes and my gun, the rest were no longer important to me anymore. They would just lead me astray, back to being afraid and lost… I was so lost, but I was so close to being home now. Home wasn’t here, it was in a place outside of the forest what was I doing? I just needed to get a little bit closer to my home, to where I would be safe and sound forevermore.

Nothing was more important than my new friends though! They would surely help me find my way home! I grinned deeply, not even noticing that my body was glowing in the dark. Who needed a flashlight when you had your friends?!

My friends kept gently pulsing, leading me forward into the darkness, and soon I stumbled into a clearing, and there I saw her again. My friend I had met earlier. She helped me find my way before, maybe she could help me again? I was ready now. Ready to be helped and no longer be lost. Each step, I found my legs growing weaker, and my breath smelled of the sweet mushrooms around us.

When I got close enough,I fell at my knees before her, and she stroked the side of my face, which sent shudders down my spine. I was so sensitive now. Our tendrils intermixed communicating things that words could not she seemed to know exactly what I was thinking.

“Oh you sweet thing, you were so lost, now we found you! Isn’t that nice?” Her voice was as sweet as the air around us, like a horrible honey that was being shoved down my throat. It was so sweet. I wanted more of it. It was all I wanted from now on for forever.

Wait I need to run, I need to run, she is going to be the death of me. I won’t survive this and I won’t be existing anymore

She wouldn’t hurt me. No I need to move. I need to stop her. She is going to kill me. I need to stop them, it’s my job.

I would runrunrunrunrunrunrrun.

I looked up in sudden panic and drew my gun and pointed it at her. I could feel it, my mind was losing to whatever was foreign substance was invading my brain. I needed to get away. Right now, I needed to put space between me and this godforsaken fungus. Even if they couldn’t save me out there maybe they could put me out of my misery and save everyone else.

“W-what did you do to me?” I managed to ask between shaking breaths, my hand trembling. I couldn’t see. I could see me? I could see her. I could see us both. I was holding a gun at myself? No. That wasn’t right. We were holding ourselves…

“We don’t understand? You were lost. We found you.” She smiled, her voice acting as though this was the most normal thing in the world. As though a dangerous weapon wasn’t being shoved into her face.

“I wasn’t lost… What did you do to us? What’s happening to my mind? I feel so far away.” I cocked the hammer back. No… we cocked it back… and we felt a slight amount of fear.

I saw us raise the gun at us. We didn’t understand why we would point a gun at ourselves. We weren’t supposed to hurt ourselves! That was gun safety 101!

No! No! We shouldn’t be thinking like this. We needed to get out. We needed to get more lost ones. They were afraid and lost out in the world, just like we were. But they didn’t need to be scared. We laughed together, a song reverberating through the clearing. That didn’t make sense.

I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was lost.

“Why are we so scared?” We asked ourself without the gun. “We found ourselves.”

“Lost ones always get scared.” We replied back. “But we’re safe and all together again!”

The us that did not hold the gun approached the us that did, and gently plucked it out of our hands. For a moment the us that held the weapon did not let go. There was something left in us that resisted, but we shouldn’t resist we wanted to feel good and safe and happy! Thinking back to how scared we were back on the trail in the dark afraid of being alone… the I was gone. And the gun was let go of.

We fell to our knees at our feet as we wept glowing green tears, a crunch of metal as tendrils made sure such a nasty piece of weaponry never hurt anyone ever again. They were dangerous and someone might get hurt.

“Do we see now?”

We wept, a long howling of elation and tears escaping into the air. “We do sister.”

We let go and let our mind drift away into collective, relaxing completely and utterly into our arms, as we were pinned down under ourselves.

The old useless clothes were torn away off our body, and our tendrils began to probe us, connecting us close than even our Friends could on their own. We were hard, we were wet, we intertwined and fell into desperate howling pleasure under the moon. It was every feeling we could ever think of, conceive of, desire in its entirety. This was a succulent union, an existence that surpassed whatever came before. A truly perfect gestalt as we melted into one another.

The rest of us, who had been waiting in the trees came out to join us, to celebrate another one of us being found. Maybe they would send more lost ones, so we could find them too.

Maybe they would let us bring the next one home.

That would be nice.