When I woke up, I checked the camera app I had. Cassidy was still asleep. I sighed in relief. Even though she didn’t try an escape attempt day 2 or day 3, I still felt on edge, waiting for her to try.

It was amusing how deeply she slept — which was good since I could sneak in and out. One day I’d use her body while she’d be asleep or half-awake. Not in the first week of our dynamic, though. For now, I’d simply quietly slide in, undo the chain on her anklet cuff, leave the note for her, and then leave.

I’d hope that after yesterday, she’d have some idea on how to do her makeup. She couldn’t just keep disappointing me that way. Though, she had been wonderfully obedient in many other ways. Resistant, sure, and definitely still adjusting to her situation. But she was trying. Even if she didn’t want to be doing so.

I exhaled as I watched her gently breathe. Shaking my head, I put the phone away. I couldn’t risk putting all of my emotional stakes in Cassidy, even if she was my Soulmate. That was a sure fire way to get betrayed, to get hurt.

As I washed my face and did my own makeup, I began to wonder. What was I going to do with her today? Rather, what exactly was my goal with her? I stared at the Soulmate Mark. Still, it had not reverted back to how it appeared. I suppose I couldn’t expect one day to fix the bad blood between us. But Soulmates needed goals, or at least things to achieve. Soulmates who aimlessly wandered through their relationship, or made no effort to push themself or the other, they made no progress. With their Mark, with their relationship, with themself.

I did my makeup, working through my routine like clockwork. What did I want to accomplish with Cassidy? Rather, what did I want to accomplish for myself?

I genuinely didn’t know.

I just stared at my phone aimlessly, waiting for Cassidy to do anything at all. She turned over once, unaware that the lock had been undone. Hmm, for someone so resistant to her situation, she was sure sleeping just fine. Probably better than when I usually slept.

My goals for her. My goals for myself. Well, I wanted to be able to tell her my deepest secrets, about my system and the things truly troubling me. We clearly weren’t at that point yet. I wanted someone who I could relax around and not put on the act. Cassidy wouldn’t listen to me unless I was putting on the act. And even then, she’d do so while being a blubbering mess. Not that I cared. Not that I didn’t like that part.

My ideal for this relationship would be one built on trust. I wondered how I could show that to Cassidy, show her that I’m someone worth trusting. If destiny says we are for each other, then she is a masochist, a submissive. Then she is meant for me. But on the flipside, did that mean I would need to sacrifice core parts of my identity too?

A sudden burst of curiosity dragged me out of bed and to my computer. It was still only 5:30am. Cassidy wouldn’t be awake yet, by no chance. I hit an intercom under my desk and spoke, “cup of coffee please. Cream and sugar.” While I waited for one of the maids to prepare my coffee, I began scrolling through Soulmates 101 posts from Kensington Love’s blog. There was something nice about going back to the basics, reminding yourself of the things you already knew yourself.

Of course, it talked about goals, getting to know your partner, adjusting to your situation, and all the generic governmental resources. My mind began calculating potential goals for our relationship. What would it look like in 1 year, 5 years, 10 years? That was hard to think about when I couldn’t even imagine what we’d look like at the end of the week.

I needed to do a couple things: decide goals for myself, goals for her, goals for our relationship; learn how to train her in a way she will accept and understand; and show her that I can be trustworthy, even as I’m putting her body through hell. 

I had the feeling that first one wouldn’t come to me right away. Instead, I got an idea for how to… even start to accomplish the second two. Most of our time has been punishment or using her body for my gratification. She needed training. Conditioning. She needed the carrot and the stick.

And, I think I had an idea on how to do that.

A maid gently knocked on my door. “Come in.”

She came in and placed the coffee on my table gently. “Thank you.” Vanessa curtsied and walked off.

I clicked my phone awake. Cassidy was still asleep. I sighed. Worst part of being a morning person is waiting for everyone else to wake up. No matter, it gave me time to plan. I haphazardly grabbed one of the larger sketchbooks in my desk cabinet and began mind mapping.

Occasionally, I’d turn to my phone to look at - or watch - Cassidy sleeping. About an hour later, though, she disappeared. My heart pounded and I already began to rush out the door. Before I could, though, she emerged from her bathroom and got in position #4. I smirked. Her legs and arms were shaking so much. Couldn’t wait to see how she did her makeup today.

Before leaving, I grabbed a bag of toys I’d wanted to show her. I crossed the hallway, and walked into her room, not bothering to knock.

Her eyes turned to me, but she did not break pose. “Good morning Mistress,” she said in a weak voice. Okay. Good start.

“Good morning, my dear plaything.” Cassidy flushed. I kneeled down to meet her eye level, most importantly to look at her makeup. It didn’t look… like a complete mess. Certainly a step up from the first time she’d tried. I smirked lightly. She learned a bit from me, and that felt good to see.

It still wasn’t fantastic, though. Her eye makeup was uneven, her lipstick wasn’t applied in the proper spots, and she used far too much blush. But it was a start. “Your makeup is acceptable,” I said. “But we will keep working on it.”

I reached under to grab her chest, but just before I could, an annoying yet familiar ring sounded. I couldn’t hold back a groan of frustration. “Excuse me.” I stood up, Cassidy watching me helplessly. I flashed the phone screen my way.

“Ugh.” I did not want to deal with Nick’s bullshit so early in the morning, and on my vacation nonetheless. “Excuse me. Business calls.”

Cassidy didn’t respond, which I guess I could have asked for. I accepted the call and collapsed into Cassidy’s desk seat.

“This better be important,” I growled, “like, ‘office is on fire’ important.”

“Y-y-yeah, um, hi boss,” Nick stammered. “I, uh, the exec team is having trouble locating this quarter’s financial reports. There were a lot of papers and they don’t seem to be uploaded anywhere.” I seethed. I knew, deep in his tone, some part of Nick was blaming me. “We kind of need to get these to the stakeholders by the end of the day, so, would you, um, mind stopping by for a second, just…”

“Just what?” I shouted. “I am on vacation, you incompetent dolt, because my Soulmate Mark appeared! Just go and find it already!”

I could hear Nick wincing on the other end of the line. “Thing is, uh, your EA gave it to you.”

I paled.

“We looked through your office, um, sorry for going in without permission, but, we uh… we couldn’t find it.” That was about as polite as Nick could put it. All things considered, my office and every surface and cabinet were all disaster zones. I could have learned better organization, but that’s what I hired so many assistants for. One… one would think that they’d be able to sort through my desk, or at least try. But deep down, I knew they did try. A spear went through my heart. I turned away from Cassidy to hide my moment of weakness.

“Fine. I’ll stop by today, but only to find this for you.”

I didn’t even let Nick express gratitude. I just hung up. My eyes turned back to meet Cassidy. I wonder how much of what Nick said she heard. “You may get out of position, plaything,” I gave her permission. Good thing I did, since Cassidy seemed ready to crumble if I hadn’t soon. “Work business has called me. I need to go to the office.”

I was going to leave it at that -- but then something stopped me. I still couldn’t trust Cassidy entirely yet to make an escape attempt - and it would be much more disastrous if I weren’t home to stop her once more. But I didn’t want to bring her to work…

“We’re going to fix up your makeup. Get in the bathroom and pull everything back out.”

“Um, what’s--”

I stopped her before she could question me further. “We’re making you look presentable, plaything, so that you don’t look like a mess in the office.” I never liked the idea that she never wore makeup while working for me. But at least she could start now.

“I’m going with you?”

I tried to play off my worry with another cruel remark. “What, worried you and your two brain cells will be bored without me?”

“I… yes, Mistress.” At least she knew how to obey. Promising.

I began rummaging through the drawers. “One second. I’ll pick out your clothes,” I said.

I don’t want anyone knowing she’s mine yet.

In her drawers, I grabbed a button up -- a business shirt on the rare occasion she might need it, like today. I wish I could make her show off her cleavage to the whole world, but now wasn’t the time. I’d decide when it was.

~~

I should have fucking expected the paparazzi to not have calmed down. There was a crowd of cameras and microphones still flooding the front door of my office. “Oh for fuck’s sake,” I groaned. Thank god these windows were tinted.

“They’re still here?” I couldn’t tell if Cassidy was bemused or annoyed or whatever.

“Well, I guess I am large and important and whatever,” I grumbled. Being beautiful and powerful didn’t help me much when the newspapers were plastered with my photo, usually with headlines about controversies. And it especially didn’t help when I took what was basically a honeymoon off and came back -- unwillingly -- to find Reporter Fuckface and Cameraperson Asshole crowding around my office like children waiting for a candy store to open.

I waved to the driver. “Call over security,” I ordered, “make them clear a pathway.”

The driver gave a silent thumbs up. When I was pissed off like this, I liked it when people didn’t talk when they didn’t need to.

Cassidy stayed still in her seat, grasping onto the belt for reassurance. I wished she were grabbing onto me instead. We weren’t there yet.

This whole Soulmate thing worked out a hell lot better in my fantasies than in real life.

Security guards came out of the office, shooing reporters to the side. Before they could begin crawling up to my car, the group of them held them back. The door opened.

Truth be told, I didn’t want to leave. The noise and shouting felt like nails on a chalkboard to me. I heard Chelsea screaming to get them to shut up. Working on that.

It’s just a straight pathway to the office doors, I reminded myself, no one is allowed past security without an ID. 

My hand rose, intending to grab Cassidy’s for companionship or trust or… something…

And then I stopped.

“Let’s go,” I simply said, undoing the seatbelt and stepping out.

Cassidy followed. The reporters seemed particularly interested in her, and she seemed to be enjoying the attention just as much as I did.

“Keep your eyes down,” I said firmly to her. “Don’t make eye contact.”

Cassidy obeyed the command. I probably sounded a lot less comforting than how I intended to, but oh well. Tone was never my strong suit.

I breathed a sigh of relief once the doors closed behind me. Whew. At least my subordinates knew to leave me alone, give me space at too-early o’clock.

Cassidy’s makeup wasn’t perfect, but I did enough damage control that it was passable enough. She blended in quite well, though folks were confused by my new random assistant. When she finally had her ID card on a lanyard, she got a lot less weird stares.

Good… no one had recognized her as my Soulmate. Meaning, no one caught a photo of her, despite the way I introduced myself, and despite my house being swarmed the other day. I wasn’t sure why I was being so protective of her, over specifically people knowing she was my Soulmate.

I dragged Cassidy through a sharp left, taking an elevator that was a bit out of the way. Initially, I’d planned to do something lewd to her in the elevator, to fluster her more. But I wasn’t in the mood, and I doubted she was either.

As with most cruel CEOs who made their livings through dubious means, my office was on the top floor. Employees needed special permission to enter.  I stormed out of the elevator, Cassidy meekly following behind me, and she went into a corner of my office while I began furiously going through my papers like none of them meant anything.

“Don’t fucking leave my office,” I growled. Cassidy tensed up in the corner I left her in. I wanted to be more gracious with her, to go slower. But fuck, life was just too stressful. This time I wasn’t being mean to be sadistic and hot and dominant, I was being mean because I was exhausted and didn’t need this wrench thrown in my day.

“Yes, Mistress,” Cassidy responded in a quiet voice. She just stood there, fiddling with her hands, which was about all she could do.

Great. Now to find the fucking report. I had no idea where it was. I don’t even remember where I got it from. Cassidy was supposed to help me organize, this was on the list of things to teach her, but I couldn’t even ask her for that right now. Or reassurance. Or a cup of coffee. Or anything, really.

Want me to take over?

I shook my head to myself. No, Chelsea, I don’t need you right now. I need to find this goddamn report and go home.

Chelsea rolled her eyes, and instinctively I did as well. I didn’t want her out, not in front of Cassidy again, and especially not while I was at work.

A knock on the door startled me even further. “What!?” I shrieked.

Fuck. She stepped in that moment.

Slowly, the door opened, and Lissa gently walked in. “Um, your coffee. I thought you might need it.”

I exhaled slowly, realizing how unkempt and disheveled I looked. I must have looked ridiculous, and I screamed at Lissa in such a way… “Right,” I said coolly, trying to regain control of my body. “Just… just leave it on my desk. Please.”

“Certainly.” Lissa always knew how to remain professional, even when she’d seen me at my worst. I continued looking through the papers as she gently placed the cup on the desk. 

Next, Bethany spoke up. I didn’t want to hear her either, fuck, I didn’t want to hear anyone at all. Would you like me to--

“No!” I hadn’t realized I’d verbally shouted until I heard the sound of my own voice. My stomach dropped.

“Is everything…”

“No, I -- I just didn’t find what I was looking for in the place I thought it’d be.”

Good catch, Chelsea said casually, as if she saw me toss a crumpled piece of paper into a faraway trash can.

Would everyone please just be quiet and let me find this fucking report?

No one spoke up again. Except for Lissa. “Is this your Soulmate?”

I rose to my feet, throwing the pile of papers I held to the ground. But as soon as I opened my mouth, I wasn’t quite sure what to say. I turned to both Lissa and Cassidy, who were making awkward eye contact at each other. Lissa almost looked sympathetic towards Cassidy; it was hard not to, when she was shaking like a leaf in the corner.

Cassidy next spoke up. “I - I think… I think Mi-- um, Aura, just needs to focus on finding this paper right now.”

Something in me settled as I listened to her speak, even through her annoying stuttering.

“Thank… thank you for the coffee.” She gave a small awkward curtsy. “It, um, it will help.”

Lissa nodded slowly. “Right. I’ll leave you to it.”

And then she left.

Cassidy advocated for me.

She knew what I needed, without me saying or asking for it, and she made sure I got the time and space I needed.

“Sorry,” Cassidy murmured. “I hope that’s what you wanted me to do.”

“It…” I couldn’t even be mad at her or take my anger out on her body. She did the right thing, without even being asked. “Yes. Thank you… Cassidy.”

I felt light. I think that was the least degrading way I’d ever referred to her. I wondered what the formula was -- how she knew what to say, how she knew that she was allowed to speak, and why I didn’t refer to her as my plaything or property, even though that’s what I knew best.

“Do you…” Cassidy looked away. “Want me to help… you organize?”

I immediately opened my mouth to shoot down her idea, prepared to throw in another insult of her intellect. But I didn’t. Because that would actually have been useful for my property to do. “Yes. Just don’t lose anything or mess anything up. It should say ‘Kensington Love Quarterly Financials’ on it, for the last three months.”

Cassidy gulped and nodded. “Yes, um…”

“Still Mistress, when we’re alone,” I corrected.

“Yes, Mistress.” Cassidy walked over to another cabinet, on the other side of my office. There was no chance it’d be there, but at least my office might look a bit tidied up. She didn’t know my organization system, which was fine, because I had none. I heard the shuffling of papers behind me, and I continued.

The two of us looked for a while, possibly over an hour, both of us working in silence. Cassidy didn’t want to break my fugue, and I didn’t feel as though I had anything to say. Somehow, having Cassidy there felt grounding; I would have been much more of a mess had she not been there.

Cassidy didn’t speak up; instead, she walked over to me, and quietly grabbed my attention. “Yes?” I tried to keep my voice as even as possible.

“Is this it?”

She flashed a large packet to me. Kensington Love Quarterly Financials, for the last three months.

I grabbed it out of her hands, fervently looking through the pages to make sure. This was the document. She found it. “Holy shit,” I exhaled, relief entwined with my voice, “yes. It is. Thank fucking god you found it, seriously.”

“Of… of course, Mistress.” 

I finally had a chance to look at the rest of my office. The side she had worked on looked excellent. It looked like an actual office, and seemed to be organized as such, too. I turned to my side, and it looked like each side of the office belonged to two different people. Who would have guessed someone who almost flunked out of school multiple times would be so good at organizing? Especially artist types like her. Artists were notoriously disorganized.

“Would you like me to…”

“Do this side?” I finished her sentence. “Yes. Yes I would.”

Cassidy gave a small smile. I smiled back, a small chuckle leaving my lips. For another second, we felt like actual Soulmates, and not two very different people working against each other. I moved out of the way, sitting at my desk and going through the quarterly reports. All looked good, though much of it wasn’t registering. My head felt heavy, exhausted, despite our small triumph.

I stared at Cassidy working -- for me -- despite how deliberately cruel I’d been to her. Despite how much she didn’t want to be in this situation.

I expected this Soulmate thing to go a little easier. Hah, now I felt like the stupid one.

No. I shook my head. That’s not true. I’m not stupid.

And now I had to wonder if Cassidy wasn’t as stupid as I made her out to be, either.

~~

Cassidy worked for another couple of hours, and had organized my office better than any of my assistants ever had.

I gazed upon the work she finished, admitting to be impressed. When I initially saw her grades and her hobbies, I’d imagined her to be the kind of person who leaves piles of dishes on their desk. Instead, she knew how to organize papers and where to properly sort packets. Most of the drawers were now alphabetized, some color-coded if it called for it, and with the help of a label maker, I now knew where everything was.

Praise was hard to get from me. But Cassidy earned it. I patted her head gently -- she flinched, before leaning into it -- and said, “good work, plaything.”

I kissed her on the temple. Cassidy shuffled awkwardly before answering with a ‘thank you, Mistress’.

I handed the paper to Nick, giving him a very unwarranted glare, before dragging Cassidy through the back door. The exit through the basement was less well known, and I certainly didn’t want to deal with anymore stress from the day. I was ready to go back home and go back to training my submissive to be my perfect toy.

Truth be told, I didn’t really want to do much of anything.

I wanted to hurt Cassidy. Sadism is a love language, to me. But she wasn’t there yet. Cassidy was obviously a masochist and a submissive. I’ve seen flashes of it in her eyes, the way she quivers in heat when I leave a bruise. But emotionally, she is not there yet.

I guess I couldn’t blame her. It had only been four days. One would think that the CEO of one of the largest companies in the Soulmate Industry would know what to do here, but I suppose that’s wrong, too.

Start with… treating her like a person. That was the obvious solution. There were many ways to do that; the uncertainty slammed into me like a wave.

What would make Cassidy happy?

Here’s a better idea. How could I reward her for helping me today? Especially without being ordered to do so?

She still looked out the window or at her feet. Obviously she was uncomfortable, even now.

There was no better way than to just ask. “How would you like to spend the rest of our day together?”

“Huh?” Cassidy turned to me and cocked her head. “What… do you mean?”

“Well,” I sighed, holding my arms together. I didn’t know what I meant. “You… proved yourself worthy and useful to me today. You believe that deserves to be rewarded, don’t you?”

Cassidy looked away awkwardly. “Yes…”

“Yes, what?”

She flinched. “Yes, Mistress.”

“Better. So… what would you like from me?”

The two of us sat in the vehicle in silence. Cassidy looked towards me with wide, confused eyes, and then looked away. Did she want me to decide for her? Had she given into her real purpose in life, allowing me to dictate her being?

But after a minute, Cassidy opened her mouth. “Would you please let me--”

My heart sank. Somehow, I knew what she was about to say, and I had to stop it. “Letting you go is not an option, for your information.”

Cassidy’s mouth closed. A burst of rage fumed inside of my chest. She… was actually still thinking of leaving? I thought she just proved herself to actually want to be a part of my life, and--

And--

And--

I looked away, clutching my arms together tighter. “You weren’t really trying to ask for that, were you?” I wanted to sound tough, dominant, put together, but in reality that prospect hurt.

“N-no, Mistress.” I could tell Cassidy was only giving me a half-truth.

“Then what did you want to ask for?” My voice turned demanding. I couldn’t help it. The stress from the day boiled to my head, triggering adrenaline to rush through my veins.

Cassidy paused. Every millisecond she didn’t speak I grew more suspicious, more frustrated. “I wanted to ask… if you would let me go the day without being hit with anything. If we… if you could do something else, to, to me.”

That… was better than ‘will you please release me’, I suppose. But it still showed me Cassidy didn’t fully accept her role. It would have made me feel better if she asked — oh I don’t fucking know, to go to her favorite art supply store or whatever. That seemed like a much more greedy request to anyone else, should I have been anyone less rich, but that would have been asking for so much less. If she asked for something that didn’t reject her role, even if it was a neutral request, I would have felt a tad better. She was getting there, obviously, and today proved it. Being my property meant that, since I was a sadist, Cassidy had to be a masochist. Something in her loved being hit. At least, that’s what I’d assumed. And yet, here she was, still denying it. She denied me the pleasure of hurting her, and she denied herself the pleasure of being hurt.

Every day, Cassidy made me question everything I knew about Soulmates.

But… without being hit with anything… she didn’t say go the day without hurting her. My mind began to do calculations, ways I could reward her that maybe would still help bring out her inner submissive.

Obviously, there were ways.

I smiled — having to force it a little — and reached my hand out, caressing Cassidy’s face gently. “I think I can accommodate that wish, plaything. But…”

I scrunched up her hair. Not enough to hurt. But enough to startle her for sure. “I am still going to show you that you love being a masochist. That you love being property, that you love being mine. I am going to make that wish that you so desperately want to keep secret fulfilled.” Cassidy whimpered, tears already forming. I flicked them away with my other hand. “So I will reward you by not hitting you. But you still have work to do. Training to do. Do you understand?”

“Yes, Mistress,” she choked out. I let go of her hair.

“Driver,” I called out. I didn’t know his name. “Reroute your GPS.”

“Of course, ma’am,” he already pulled up the app. “Where to?”

“The…” The Smith Mall wouldn’t suffice. That was the exact opposite of Cassidy’s vibe, though I would take her for a closet refresh and makeover eventually. “The mall in Anderson, please. The west entrance.”

“Of course.”

Cassidy looked at me confusedly. “Why are we going there, Mistress? You don’t want to go home?”

“I do,” I said. “But I think you want me to pick your real reward. And I want to reward you, first.”

“That place is…” Cassidy clutched onto her seatbelt. “Pricy.”

I narrowed my eyes. “And I am very, very rich. Are you questioning this?”

She frantically shook her head. “N-no, of course not, Mistress!”

“Good,” I pursed my lips and crossed my arms.

The panic in me didn’t settle down. I still wasn’t sure she didn’t absolutely want to escape. And it would be very easy for Cassidy to blend in, for her to leave my sight, especially since I made her cover up her Soulmate Mark. I opened my purse and searched through it. I heard the clinking of metal and smirked. I knew I wouldn’t have come unprepared.

“One more thing.”

I pulled from my bag a set of handcuffs and a collar and leash to match. Cassidy gasped and frantically shook her head. Some sort of survival response triggered in her. “No, no please don’t make me—“

“I need to know that you won’t run off,” I started.

“I won’t! I promise!” Oh and now she was sobbing. And now I was horny because of it. Fuck, I wanted to hit her and make her cry harder. But I promised. I’d make her hurt in other ways. Humiliation seemed like a perfect option. 

“I don’t trust you yet,” I growled. “Hold out your wrists.”

Cassidy hesitated, silently refusing the very simple order.

“Do you want to do this the easy way, or the hard way?” I continued to hold out the handcuffs. “You could put both hands on your womb instead and press in, if you want.”

Her eyes widened and she shook her head again.

“See? You know what that’d do. I’m giving you a choice, plaything. What will it be?”

Finally, after another couple of agonizing seconds, she acted. Cassidy held out her hands, one tear falling from her eyes and another soon after. “There. Good girl.” I quickly clasped the handcuffs around herself. “Now, the leash.”

It took a while for Cassidy to allow me to do that. She wanted this. I knew she did. Soulmate Marks didn’t lie or make mistakes. She was property. She was a submissive. She was a masochist. She couldn’t go much longer denying herself these things.

Cassidy lifted her hair. I wrapped the collar around her and clasped it shut. I gave an experimental tug. It fit well enough, not too loose and not tight enough to choke her. I grabbed the leash and held it still. “There.”

I stroked her cheek, her owned, soft cheek. “I won’t hit you,” I promised.

“Thank you, Mistress,” she whimpered.

“Good girl.” I petted her hair. I touched her, exploring her body again, and Cassidy allowed this. She didn’t have much of a choice even if I weren’t her Soulmate.

Before I could get too far — or too turned on — the driver parked right outside the mall’s western entrance. “Here you go,” he said. “Have fun, you two.”

“We will,” I pulled out a wad of cash and handed it to him. I had no idea how much I gave him, but I knew it covered the payment plus tip. 

I tugged on Cassidy’s collar, lightly choking her if she refused. “Let’s go.”

She will enjoy this. I will make her.

~~

Ugh. It was not often I came to this mall.

It’s not that it was bad or didn’t feature things I enjoyed. But why go here when I can go to the Smith Mall and be my normal self? Cassidy wouldn’t fit in there, even as a rich bitch’s property. Instead, I felt out of place here, with all the artsy retailers and specialty stores.

Cassidy seemed to be much more at ease once we got out of the car and into the mall. Her dismay over the handcuffs and the leash quickly vanished once one shiny thing caught her eye. She was so cute. I loved watching her get distracted, and I loved the pouty look she tried to hide when I tugged her along.

My submissive’s eyes got especially distracted when we crossed paths with another Ownership-type couple. A puppy girl on a leash, or a doll in shibari picking out a new wig. They all looked so obedient, with wide smiles on their faces as they did as they were told. My anxiety returned. Cassidy and I would get there one day… wouldn’t we?

I didn’t do a whole lot of tugging. This was supposed to be a reward, wasn’t it? So I could let her get distracted and wander around -- not too far, of course. I kept my hand firmly on the leash whenever she tried to get away, intentionally or not. It was weird, though. Why hadn’t she asked to buy anything, or to even go in any of the stores? I would have thought that she would be a little more excited about a shopping spree, especially considering the little bit she came with.

“Plaything,” I pulled her close to me. “You don’t want to go in anywhere?”

Cassidy gave me a dumb, confused look. “I… didn’t know I was allowed to.” She paused, then added, “Mistress.”

Oh. I didn’t tell her.

Now I felt like the dumb one.

I scowled. I hated that this brat made me feel dumb. It was supposed to be the other way around, no? Cassidy picked up on my indignation and shrank. “Very well.” I inhaled. “Since I need to spell it out for you: we’re on a shopping spree.”

Cassidy tilted her head and looked even more confused. “I-- why?”

I was about to scold her for questioning me again, but I controlled myself. “Because… you helped me today,” I explained. “Even though you weren’t ordered to, even though you didn’t have to. And you did a fine job at it. So, as you can guess, when you do things for me, when you succeed in your role, you’ll be rewarded accordingly. As any submissive should.” I wanted to add, ‘Did I say that slowly enough?’ But I suppressed the urge. She didn’t need to hear that right now.

She smiled gently. I couldn’t tell if it was authentic or a dissociative, empty smile. “Yes… Mistress.”

I raised an eyebrow. “But you have questions.”

“Yes, Mistress.”

I sighed. “Very well. What are your questions, exactly?”

Cassidy fidgeted with the chain leash; I allowed her to. “How much can I spend?”

I rolled my eyes. “Does it look like I’m worried about that?”

I drastically motioned to my clothes, the way I was dressed, from my $300 haircut to my $2,000 shoes. And in this mall, I probably could have bought every single item. Not that I was going to or going to let Cassidy do so. “You’ll have enough when I say you have enough.”

“That’s… very generous,” Cassidy murmured. I could tell there was shame and resignation in her voice, even during a reward, and not even a sadistic one at that. “Thank you, Mistress. Um… what can I get then? A-and how many, um, things?”

I tapped my chin. I didn’t think to make a yes/no list. “You can show me what you want and I will say yes or no,” I said. “You might not see yourself getting a ton of frivolous purchases. But I won’t veto everything you ask for just to be mean. Nothing that would enable outside contact--”

Cassidy opened her mouth to try to protest, but she quickly caught herself. “Good girl,” I said, eyeing her down to make sure she wouldn’t try anything like that again. “Clothes that won’t look good on you as my submissive, anything that would enable any of your escape attempts, anything that…” I sighed and waved my hand. “You get the picture. At least, I hope you do.”

“Yes, Mistress. I…” I held my breath. “Thank you. This… is very generous. I, um, I don’t really know why you’re doing this for me--”

“Because I can and I get to decide what happens with your life,” I interrupted. “And…”

I pulled her in close and lightly petted her hair. I held her tighter and tighter against my chest. “Because I want you to feel loved and cared about. Not as my property, but as my Soulmate.”

I still needed to think about my goals for her though.

Why do I want a brainless bimbo who I can insult and hurt any which way I want?

And how do I make Cassidy want that, too?

Cassidy paused, nodded, giving me time to muse, and continued. “It… means a lot.”

My heart fluttered. I exhaled in… relief? Contentment? I wasn’t quite sure. I grabbed the leash tight and held it up. “Well, why don’t we start…”

~~

I made Cassidy hold all the bags, of course. It was funny watching her plead to get whatever she wanted and then have to carry it all across a four story mall. Making her walk up the stairs in heels as I took the escalator was a particularly funny sight. I loved seeing her try to bottle up her frustration. But most of the time, she didn’t look frustrated, or even scared, helpless, weak. She just looked gracious, holding a small smile on her lips most of the time we were together.

Eventually, we left. I didn’t know or care how much we spent, but I knew this trip was enough to call itself a good reward.

Now, back to training. Where were we?

Cassidy hauled all the bags inside, white circles around her arms and fingers, her entire body red and sweating. We walked up the stairs, and at some point, I let her fatigue get the best of me. I grabbed half the bags and kept going.

Eventually, we made it back into Cassidy’s room. As she looked through her impulsive purchases, I looked at my watch. We lost five whole hours today… though I suppose it wasn’t all for nothing.

We made some progress.

I looked down at my Soulmate Mark, and frowned. It still hadn’t grown back to even its original state. I wanted to kick myself, or Cassidy, or anyone or anything. Why the hell would it not grow back? I felt humiliated that I, of all people in the world, had their Soulmate Mark regress.

“Is something wrong, Mistress?”

I looked up. I didn’t look that annoyed, did I?

“Show me your chest,” I ordered.

“Wh-what?! But--” Cassidy exclaimed. She clasped her hands over her mouth; her outburst clearly was unintentional, but that didn’t mean it went unpunished.

I raised my hand, and almost slapped her. Almost. And then I remembered that I promised I wouldn’t. It hurt to put my hand back down. “I promised I wouldn’t hit you. I apologize for momentarily forgetting.” I didn’t like how much I was apologizing, but oh well. “Just show me your chest, plaything.”

“Y-yes, Mistress.” Oh fuck if I could get her to cry it would be so hot. She tearily opened her button up, revealing her mark. Cassidy’s mark, too, had not gone back to its original state.

Panic began to fill my head. Was Cassidy’s outburst, and Chelsea’s defense, really so detrimental to our relationship? What in the world was going to fix it? I tried going in harder, I tried treating her with more softness, I tried rewarding her for good behavior. My head hurt just trying to think of what the fuck else I could possibly do.

No. Cassidy had nothing to do with our Soulmate Marks regressing, even during her outburst. Chelsea, to some extent. But the person really responsible was me. Me, for expecting a cutout Soulmate instead of a real damn human being. I shook my head. I felt so stupid, and that shame only drove my anger further.

“Fuck,” I seethed. “Why have our Marks not gone back yet?!”

Normally I would have kept my outburst to myself, but the rage and panic in me compounded each other. Cassidy shrunk and began to sob as I continued. “What is it that I’m not doing for you? What is it that I’m not doing to you? I’m trying everything I can think of to fix this mess!”

“I-it might take time,” Cassidy spoke in a soft voice.

“Shut the fuck up!” I hadn’t even noticed Chelsea taking over the headspace. Before I could even think to reign myself back in, she continued for me. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

“Do you realize who I am? I should know how to navigate Soulmate relationships better and yet, I can’t figure you and your goddamn puny brain out yet!”

Stop, Chelsea! I begged internally. When Chelsea had something to say, though, it was damn near impossible to ground myself and take over once more. This isn’t helping our situation! Let me talk, damn it--

Cassidy continued to cry. “I’m sorry, Mistress! I just… I just don’t know what to do or say! I’m trying everything too, b-but this is still really hard on me!”

I -- Chelsea -- growled and slammed my foot, beginning to angrily pace around the room.

“I don’t understand why this is happening!” Cassidy’s panic clearly worked off of my own. She was sensitive, empathetic, and those traits were showing here. “I just wanted to help people who were being hurt, but I failed at that, and now I’m failing at this too! We haven’t even known each other for a week yet, and - and - and I just don’t think we can rush this!”

“Who are you to talk!? You tried to escape the very first night we were together!”

Cassidy’s frustration broke through her voice. Quickly, we were getting to the same place as before. My chest felt heavy as I felt the walls of my body close in on me.

“How can you blame me? You -- you hurt me! You like seeing me cry! You undressed me in public the first time we met! Why are you still so hung up on that when it made complete sense why I felt that way?”

“I thought you wanted to work together to build this up! But nothing we’re doing is working!”

Cassidy’s tears fell down her hot face. “It takes time! I need time! You do too!”

“Don’t tell me what I need, you stupid little bitch!”

“Stop calling me these things! Stop insulting me! Don’t you realize why I wanted to escape, with the way you’re treating me? What makes you think I’d feel any different now?!”

“You promised you wouldn’t leave us!”

My world froze the second the last word ran from my mouth. Chelsea fucked up. She knew she fucked up. I fucked up letting ourself get this far, again. I hastily grounded myself, breathing heavily, trying to reign in the situation again. No, no, no! Why the fuck does she keep interfering?!

Because I’m right.

I curled my hands tight, tensing my body up to silence her. Silence hung between me and Cassidy. Cassidy was stupid, but she wasn’t that dumb. She clearly heard what I just said.

“...Us?” she asked meekly. Her voice still choked, but the tears had stopped falling.

“I-I, um.” I didn’t know what to say. Cassidy was giving me that look, the kind I’d give food I knew was uncooked. 

I shook my head gently. How was I going to get out of this situation? I didn’t want her to know. At least, I didn’t want her to know yet. My body felt weak and I collapsed on Cassidy’s bed, hunched over my own body. I stared at the floor as Cassidy continued to stare at me.

“I’m sorry, Mistress,” Cassidy spoke softly. “I-I fucked up again. I shouldn’t have said all that.”

“No,” I sighed heavily. “I… I escalated this.” In reality, Chelsea did. I didn’t know how to tell Cassidy this. I’ve never told anyone. Soulmate or not, I’d be damned to reveal this to someone I’ve only known for four days. “Sit-- can you sit down, here?”

“Yes, Mistress,” Cassidy gently replied. Her body still shook with fear and adrenaline, but at least she stopped screaming back. She slowly sat down next to me. I couldn’t meet her eyes. “You… you don’t have to talk about it.”

I laughed once. “I know. I’m your Owner. I make the calls.” There was no dominance in my voice, though; it was as if my words were hollow, meaningless.

Chelsea escalated us into a fight twice now.

Bethany made her muffins, and I couldn’t hide my surprise.

Fae would make her dumb, technically correct comments.

Citrus came out, and needed comfort, and needed to be promised we wouldn’t be left.

My system was in chaos. My world was in chaos too. I thought I had control of everything here; really, that was a lie too.

I had to tell Cassidy the truth.

“I…” I didn’t know how to explain this. “I’m more than one person.”

Cassidy didn’t respond, but narrowed her eyes and moved in closer. “I’m plural, I guess you would call it. There are… multiple personalities in my body. There’s me, of course, your-- your Owner. And then there… there are others.”

Cassidy still didn’t say anything. I had to hold back my own tears now. At least I knew how to do that. “You’ve met a couple. I… the ‘person’ who was out just now was Chelsea. She was out the previous fight, too.”

She nodded. Fuck. I didn’t want to explain more. What if this made her want to leave me even more? What if she thought I was like those stereotypes, those hideous ways movies liked to show people like me? What if she thought I’d be dangerous -- not on account of being a sadist, but on account of dissociative identity disorder?

That would hurt so much more than anything else.

“I’ve never told anyone this,” I admitted. “Not any of my staff. Not a therapist. And…” I held my body tight. “Not my family. Because they… because they, um…”

Cassidy slowly raised a hand. I didn’t know what she was doing, but she placed it on my back, gently. She stroked me -- her motions choppy and awkward -- but she was comforting me. Once again, she saw me in distress, and came to help me.

I remembered the things Chelsea spat out to her. Guilt and regret churned in my stomach. “They did this to me,” I explained. I suppose that was the best way to put it. “They didn’t… treat me like a child. They treated me like I was some punching bag. I - I don’t want to get into specifics.” We’d be here for a long time if I did. “But… there you have it. That’s the real me. And… I’m telling you this not because I want to, but because keeping it from you is only hurting us more.”

I wiped my left eye before any tears could fall down.

Cassidy reached out and pulled me into a tight hug.

For a moment, I panicked, and then I felt safe. Embraced by my Soulmate. She didn’t reject me. At least, it didn’t seem like that.

“I’m sorry, Mistress,” Cassidy spoke. “I don’t know what happened to you, but I’m sorry. You… you didn’t deserve it.” She still struggled to say kind things about me. But I had to be realistic. This is a woman who hated my guts for years and saw my face as the persona of everything she hated.

I was trying. She was, too.

“I don’t understand why we’re Soulmates, and - to be honest, I don’t really understand plurality right now. But I want to…” She placed a hand on mine. “I want to help you. So, whatever you need me to do, however you need me to talk to your, um, your other parts, I’ll do my best.”

I didn’t immediately respond. I just let the two of us sit there, uninterrupted, for a very long time.

In reality, I still feel as if I shouldn’t have told her. I should have kept it secret for a while longer. I still couldn’t trust Cassidy; she did just imply she was still seeing escape as an option. But even I couldn’t rewind time. Even my company didn’t have the money to do that.

“Thank you, plaything,” I said, kissing her temple and petting her hair softly. “I’m sorry for what I said. I know this will take time. We… we have all the time in the world.”

Cassidy hummed. “We do,” she said. “We have time.”

“Time…” I mused out loud. “I want you to be my submissive. I want you to do whatever I want you to. But…” My hands scrunched up. I leaned my weight into my Soulmate. I felt vulnerable. It wasn’t something I cared to feel often, but around my Soulmate it should be okay, right? “My whole life, I’ve wanted a Soulmate, and I’ve wanted them to kneel at my feet immediately, and do everything exactly as I say. I’ve wanted someone to beat up when I feel like it, and for them to enjoy it. I don’t have that here. So my vision of what this…” I motioned to both of us, “...is, has been upended.”

Silence hovered amongst us. Cassidy only listened. Which was good. I didn’t want her to speak.

“You’re right,” I sighed. “You need time to adjust. I… I will try to go slower, but as your Mistress, I still expect you to follow my orders. Even if it takes some practice. I will try to…” The words felt painful coming out of my mouth, feeling my ultimate fantasy fade away. “Meet you where you are.”

“I… would like that, Mistress.”

In that moment, with her holding me and me holding her back, I felt at peace. My breathing felt natural, like every breath dispelled the tension in me. Cassidy clearly felt similar, though she did take a while to stop hiccuping tears. Eventually, I broke the silence.

“I gave you a secret of mine,” I said, “so I’d like to take a secret of yours.”

“Hmm?” Cassidy hummed.

“I’d like you to pick one of your sketchbooks,” Cassidy froze, “and show me each and every page.”

“O-oh,” she stammered. “I… I… y-yes, Mistress.”

I grabbed her arm before she could get up. “Will you feel comfortable with that?” I don’t know why I was asking. I didn’t need to. But it felt like it was the right thing to do. We were pushing and pulling our dynamic, getting closer every time. I knew I needed times to choose softness, to give her choices.

“Yes, Mistress,” Cassidy said. “I’d… I’d like that a lot.”

I blinked. That was a surprise. I expected more resistance, more fighting back, more negotiating, especially after I gave her the option. I didn’t understand how to control her, but I let her body go to look through her messy suitcase.

It took a while before she landed on one she liked, and she sat back down on the bed with me. “Do you want me to… flip to random pages, or…”

I just took the sketchbook from her hands. “I’ll flip through it how I see fit.” I could still have some control. Cassidy’s face was flushed red, but not from anger. From embarrassment?

Definitely from embarrassment. Every page we flipped through, she thought of some excuse to give me, as if she should be ashamed of her art. Like it was sinful. Slowly, her explanations turned more neutral, and then she began talking about what each painting, drawing, or sketch meant to her.

Cassidy was truly a gifted artist. I did cross her portfolio page when I was researching her, but I didn’t pay it much heed. Clearly, that was a mistake. Every medium she used, she used it flawlessly. Any subject was drawn with nothing but pure expertise. I had to wonder, during this, why she chose law. Why did she choose such a drastically different path…

I had a talented submissive. I had property who I could be proud of. We still needed time to learn each other, but we accomplished much of that today. I glanced back at our marks.

Holy shit--

“Plaything,” I tried to keep my voice even, “our Marks--”

“Hmm?” Cassidy looked down and gasped.

They returned to their initial state. I couldn’t help but laugh and smile. This felt like such a miniscule step -- like two steps back, one step forward -- but we were making progress again. The key on mine looked ornate again, and even had some blue watercolor shades to it. Similar, the cat on Cassidy’s Mark was back in its cage, sleeping peacefully. Splotches of watercolored orange surrounded it. Our Marks didn’t just return; they grew further.

I collapsed into Cassidy. I was all giddy and I felt so childish for it. But I relished this moment. And judging by Cassidy’s happy, gentle laughter, she did the same.

“We’re getting there, plaything,” I said. “I can’t wait to own you, more and more, every single day, for the rest of our lives.”

Our story didn’t end there. In fact, this moment here, it felt like just the beginning.