Mane gripped the sides of a porcelain sink. The bright and clear sense of normalcy she had finally slipped into was slinking away from between her fingers. Tears rolled down her face, their weight and heat magnified by the knowledge that she had tried so hard to get away from them. She didn't see, on account of her bleary eyes, the beautiful vine details on the faucet or the handles. She didn't see the beautiful rose design on the drain plug, either. She had been so...close! She made friends! She went out on her own and met people and had a normal, fun day with other living things that (seemingly) appreciated her! So why, then, did THIS have to happen at the end!? She did something good for a cute stranger! She helped feel at ease enough to stop crying, was that not enough!?

Her face dropped down and her messy hair fell to cover her eyes and cheeks. Mane's body shook slightly with a mix of negative emotions she lacked the conviction to investigate. She let out panicked gasps and tried to recuperate the losses with shaky gulps of air. She was rapidly losing control of herself. Good thing she had somehow convinced the affini to give her space while she did. Assuming that she actually did, anyway. Were there...security cameras and shit, in this building? She had never been good at spotting those, and it was unlikely that the affini didn't have the ability to make ones infinitesimally smaller than those of the Terran Accord. 

Damnit, just when she thought she'd found a distraction she caught the sight of her reflection. She tried not to fixate on the parts of her face she didn't like, or how her chin hair was already growing back in. She tried not to recall how terrible she was at shaving it off, but she failed, and that brought memories of her father forcing her to get her beautiful hair chopped off, and THAT brought her back to college, when her sister got trashed and took scissors to her head.

No, no, this was not ALLOWED, she was finally having an alright day god DAMNIT! Mane kicked at the air with one leg and struggled to think about something else, ANYTHING else, something that wasn't her awful abusive family, she had escaped she had escaped she was FREE now, they couldn't fucking TOUCH her now, never again!

But...that wasn't really true, was it? She collapsed into a comfy chair that the room featured. She buried her face in her hands. She had only escaped from them by giving herself to the affini. On the incredibly small chance they let her escape the fate she had theoretically signed up for, she'd be back on their radar. She could live on her own now too, theoretically, because capitalism was gone. But what. Fucking. GOOD was THAT!? She'd have to either leave Melody behind- which was unthinkable- or live on the Crest or the ARGOS, which were both teeming with the affini. Was there...ANY happy ending in sight!?

….no. Of course there wasn't. That was a silly question. 

She sighed with defeat. The girl wasn't sure when she'd gotten the idea in her head that this might all work out. She had willingly signed up for domestication, after all, and she was an admitted murderer. The affini were unlikely to let someone like her go. Her only hope of release was to put on such a good show of healing emotionally that they became convinced she was no threat to anyone. How long might that take? Months? Years? Where did she want to go? What did she WANT, in the future?

As always, her brain told her nothing. Her heart had nothing to offer, either. Nothing but anxiety and static. She remembered blowing up at her mother for asking what her plan was for the future; she had no plan. Her mind had no room for the future, for any future. Where a normal person's brain probably held blueprints for weeks or years in advance, her own held nothing but fear and a drive to ensure she *got* there. 

She closed her eyes and curled into the fetal position. Tears streamed down her face. This was her life now. She was a broken thing, a wild animal. All she was capable of was ruminating on the knives planted for her like landmines in the immediate future. She would evade them, all day, every day, but for WHAT. There was no endgame, no goal, no princess locked in a tower or former fairy tale prince who now likened himself to Satan or magic sword that would hurl her forward in time to face a different world under the heel of a much more obvious evil for her to vanquish. Her enemy was formless, and she could not win. She could only...struggle. On and on, forever. She could bare her teeth and roar all she wanted, but she was still just a wounded beast in a net. She was a corpse that didn't know it was dead. 

Mane's tablet beeped. She took it, afraid Effus was worried about her. The last thing she wanted right now was to enrage the affini by rejecting her help. She would survive, if only out of spite. 

Hello Mane! read the message. It was from Ursula.  I have a date with a hot muscle lady tomorrow! Aaaa I'm excited! 

For a while, the dark clouds were expulsed from Mane's soul. She texted back, aaa!!! Coooool! I hope it goes great!! I'm cheering for u beyah!!!! Followed by what some might call an excessive amount of emoticons. The two traded compliments a few times after that, then the conversation went quiet. Mane felt the clouds coming back, but they weren't as thick or imposing this time. She sighed and moved back to the sink, where the bag of her medicine was sitting. 

She opened the bag. Most of the pills it contained looked familiar to her, but it was lacking her HRT. That, she figured, must make the few things she didn't recognise...it must have meant that those were her Class G xenodrugs. She took each of them in turn, then swiveled to look at the shower that the room sported. Effus probably wanted her to wash up, and it wasn't like she didn't have a pressing need to take one regardless. Mane sighed and stripped, but first she checked the door to ensure that it was locked.

It was. 

----------

Mane emerged from the Sophont Care Station feeling fresh. Her new outfit consisted of a blue crop top and a pair of skinny jeans, which felt nicer and more comfortable than those usually did. Mane had spent a moment after getting dressed marveling over the softness and comfort of the material they were made from. It was certainly not something she would mind getting used to, but now had more important matters to consider. She approached Effus, her clothes from the previous day poorly folded and held under her arm. 

"Hey Effus. I'm feeling...better, I guess. Mostly." She smiled. Her smile was weak but, at least, it was...mostly genuine. "Do we have anything to put these in?" 

"I can carry them, dear." A vine reached out and Mane carefully moved her dirty clothes into it. The vine delicately coiled around them and brought the mass of fabric to rest at Effus' side. "I'm glad you're feeling better. May I hold your hand?"

"No."

For a moment, Effus seemed to look hurt. That passed before long and she nodded her wooden imitation of a face. "I understand, sweetheart. Do you wanna go home?" Mane nodded. Effus turned away from her but paused for a second. "Do you want to walk next to me?"

"Y-yeah…" Mane got into position on Effus' right. They moved. Effus walked with purpose in the direction of her hab, while Mane kept up. She found herself retreating almost unwillingly back into her mind, no matter how hard she tried not to let herself do it. Every few turns she managed to pull herself free. No attempts to focus on anything else worked...not for long, at least. 

"Sweetheart," Effus spoke, "You said you had breakfast?" 

"Yeah, I've eaten," Mane answered and slipped her hands nervously into her coats' pockets. Upon feeling the knife, she immediately slipped them out and put them in her pants' pockets instead. "Why do you ask?"

"Well," Effus mused, "you did do some self care. And between that and being kind to a stranger, I think that merits a treat. Would you like to stop somewhere on the way and get some chocolate or something?" Mane weighed her options...and quickly remembered that she liked chocolate. A lot. 

"That sounds good," she answered quietly. "I could go for that." 

"That settles it then," Effus trilled. She looked up and about for a second in search of something. "Ah, there! This was my last ward's favorite. Come, come!" She opened the door to a big chocolate shop and several of her vines waved in such a way as to gesture for Mane to enter. Mane reluctantly followed that request and stepped into a building deliberately designed to match the aesthetic of retro candy stores. "Retro" was underselling it, though, this look was considered "retro" when the 500-year-old Terran art that the affini no doubt took it from was new. Still, it was a nice look. The walls and shelves glowed with a vibrance, colorfulness, and quality of whimsy that all felt like they compensated, just a little bit, for those having been sucked out of Mane. Bright gobstoppers and lollipops and cakes were on display just about everywhere. In the corners there were terminals to use for custom orders: birthday cake and stuff, presumably. 

"What can I get?" Asked Mane.

"What do you mean?" Asked Effus, who was clearly confused. Before Mane could clarify, Effus' brain caught up and realized what her ward had meant. "Oh. Well, as long as you can either carry it home or eat it here, take whatever you'd like, darling! Post scarcity, remember?" 

Right. Mane nodded to herself. Right, right. Money was a thing of the past now, like the idea that women weren't allowed to wear pants. At least, it was wherever the affini were in charge. She stretched and looked over everything before deciding on a pretty normal looking chocolate bar and showed it to Effus. Then, unsure of herself, she grabbed a second. Effus was watching and didn't seem to mind, so she took that as approval. They walked out the exit. On the way Mane bumped into a girl who looked to be about twenty. She had light brown hair and matching eyes. 

"Eh- oof! Sorry!" She piped up happily. Her eyes looked Mane over. Something in her seemed to click. "Oh, you're cute! Have a wonderful day!" Then she ran off into the store.

"Recognise her?" Effus asked. Mane unwrapped the first of her candy bars with a frown. She slowly shook her head. 

"I have no idea who that was." Mane ate some of her chocolate. "Thanks…thank you, Effus. This is really good." 

"Don't thank me, darling, it's the least you deserve. Do you want to wait a little and eat?"

"No, thank you. I wanna go...go home." Effus stimmed happily with her vines and her flowers danced all about. She nodded vigorously and made a long noise of joy and excitement. 

"Yes, darling, absolutely! Right this way, come along~" 

She led Mane on the way back to her hab. Mane slowly ate her chocolate and kept in step just to Effus's left. She wasn't having trouble keeping her mind off of her family or her fate anymore, which was good. The bad news was that now, that girl was visiting her head rent free. Who were they? What was going on in their head when they looked at her? Something had clearly clicked into place, but what had it been? 

"You seem anxious. Do you think that girl was a rebel? She might recognise you from your time with your father." Mane shook her head. No, it couldn't be that. 

"No. I don't think so."

"Do you want me to message the affini who runs the store? He could look into her for you-"

"No." Mane got bad hunches about harmless people sometimes. That girl was probably harmless. 

"Are you sure?" Effus was becoming increasingly worried. "I don't want anyone hurting you, darling. I'll even advocate for her to help her avoid forceful domestication if you want, would that help?"

"No," Mane grunted. "Just...please."

"Okay. I'll respect your wishes." A moment of silence. "Mane...I...know I treated you, kind of like dirt sometimes when you first came here. Erias...she made certain that I understood it. I can't excuse that, but...I'm going to grow. I'm on your side, and you don't have to forgive me, or cooperate, or even believe me, but...I'm sorry I yelled at you. I'm sorry I tread over you, and even when I didn't I tried to sometimes. I'm sorry for that too. Erias...Erias and Mort treated you with more respect than I did, and as your caretaker that is shameful of me. I'm going to be better moving on. I promise." Mane nodded but said nothing. The two continued walking.