Negotiations on shaky vines
chapter 10 - A bit of hope
by Exhausted_ambition
I’m bored with practicing for exams, so I wrote one more chapter. This one was quite difficult to write in some parts as it gets quite heavy. There is luckily some comfort in the other half so that is refreshing.
Martha rushed forward and grabbed Hendrik before he fell out of the chair. Using her vines, she created a small cradle in her arms. Her fear of him reacting to being touched like earlier was dismissed by the sight of Hendrik already asleep.
Part of her was angry, both towards herself and the universe that had made this sophont suffer so. If she had just followed him from the office maybe she could have protected him from those ferals. If she had been smarter or had a better understanding of humans, she could have seen his deceit before it all crumbled down on him.
No. she had decided to help Hendrik get better with him, not despite him. Humans valued their freedom to be who they wanted to be, and she would not take this from Hendrik. Maybe It was selfish to let her opinions on domestication procedure prolong Hendriks’s suffering. But if she allowed that primal part to take control it would not be Henrik that remained, at least not what he would have chosen to be.
“I think I feel better than I should……still not great” his voice was almost calm but there was a deep sadness to them that made Martha’s core shudder.
Hendrik looked up at her, tears were building in his eyes “I…. I don’t”. he took a deep breath trying to hold back the tears “I don’t know who I am”. He covered his face with is arm and begun to cry.
“I can’t….. I just….when you….” Hendrik was sobbing to heavily to finish the sentence.
“When… when you asked me why I cared so much about power…… I couldn’t find an answer. I couldn’t even come up with a convincing lie. The work, The Game…. it’s my life. I don’t know what I am without it. I don’t even think…. there is a ‘me’ left. I’m nothing” he buried his face in his hand and continued to cry, he sounded utterly broken.
She continued to hold him, he uncovered his face and looked up at her. His face was wet with tears “why are you being so nice to me? It doesn’t make any sense”. It was the first sincere question she could remember him asking her.
His lips were trembling “but….but I hurt you. I lied…. and...and...when you came that night…I...I laughed at you…I”. he took a deep breath but continued before she could talk “don’t tell me I didn’t. I heard it in your voice, I betrayed, used, and hurt you. And the worst part… the worst part is that I.. liked it. I was….glad…that I had the power to hurt you. I’m a monster......” Martha did not know how to answer that.
Henrik spoke up again “there is a third alternative, isn’t there?”. He saw that she was confused “If I’m too great of a threat or just can’t be happy, some sort of drug”. Of course, he would know about class-o’s, she really did not like where this was going.
“My information on it is quite limited, what does it do?” his voice was calm. There was sadness, but the tears had dried up.
Hendrik let out a small and empty chuckle “there is not really anything…. left of ‘me’ to destroy. I did that…..my….myself. All that is left is pain….and…………I……I give up” he started to cry again.
A vine with a pointed thorn extended from her hair. she had grafted it on before arriving on Terra in case there were any sophonts that she hit it off with. It had remained unused, but she was thankful for her past self that she now had it at her disposal. The thorn struck just beneath the collar and pumped a large dose of class-H into his system.
Her voice was gentle but commanding “everything is fine little one, can you take some deep breaths for me?”. Hendrik looked dazed but begun to breathe slower in a steady rhythm. “Very good, now please look into my eyes, just like that, aren’t they interesting to watch?”. Hendriks eyes begun to glaze over, she could feel his resistance crumbling.
She let her voice fill with the full force of her biorhythm “there is something important you need to understand, and I will help you. Everything that I am going to say is true and you will know it to be true deep within you”. His reaction was a soft nod, he was following her eyes and his mouth had opened slightly.
She felt that her words had left an impact “That very good, you can trust me. Now then, I need you to come up, can you do that for me?”. She softened her biorhythm and closed her eyes for a moment, breaking the contact.
She extended a vine and scratched his head, he was simply too cute. Hendrik made a stifled moan and pushed his head against her vine, eager for more. How utterly precious, she wished she could just do this for eternity. “You’re so good for me aren’t you. Yes you are. Good boy” He seemed to recoil a bit at the last words. “You don’t like that? Interesting” she continued to scratch and pet his head.
Henrik woke with a yawn. He felt more refreshed than he had the last years. By instinct his left hand went up to remove the sleeping patch, only to find the metal collar around his neck. Right…he was the prisoner/ward of the affini, not that there seemed to be much of a difference. How did he get into bed again, oh right. He had panicked and then fallen unconscious, probably something with the collar.
He looked down to inspect what he was wearing. He was wearing some kind of white one-piece dress. Almost like a hospital gown but far, far softer. A bit apprehensively he lifted the gown and inspected his wound. At the point where he had been stabbed there was a dense mix of thin vines covering the wound but also clearly under his skin as well. The burn marks from the shock batons had healed wonderfully with only a bit of pink markings to show where they had struck.
The room was relatively sparse except for the bed, the nightstand and with a glass of water on it and a few potted plants around the room. He took the glass and drank it in one go, he had been thirstier than he noticed.
It was all over he had to keep moving. A strange feeling of determination shot through him. Even with the affini in power, even with the problems he had right now. There would always be a way forward, had he not proven that before? Where others had failed he had triumphed. This failure would not stop him.
It was kind of nice staring out in space with someone else “yeah, I feel better. Thank you” he heard Martha’s vines rumbled a little, he looked up and saw her smiling down on him.
He gave a thumbs up with his remaining hand “yeah that sounds good, I just want to look a bit longer”. He continued to look at the planet that had once been his to rule. He wondered how Nora was doing. No that was not a good train of thought, the feeling around that were too raw at the moment .
His ward went over the wash “we should probably start with you dental. The vet applied a cream that should have kept them safe, but I still want to inspect after you’ve brushed your teeth”. She handed him a toothbrush with pink cats on it and he stepped towards the wash.
Martha looked a bit concerned “are you sure you are okay? It's ok if you are tired”. He stopped leaning agist the wall and gave a shrug. “Well, if you say so, when you are done I would like to inspect your teeth to make sure everything is fine” he heard she was still a bit concerned
He opened his mouth and three thin vines entered, it tickled a bit and his instincts told him to recoil but he resisted the impulse. She had crouched down to his level but was still at least 15 cm taller “this seems to be good, everythi-……..hmmm do you feel any pain here” she used a vine to touch just above his right gums.
“Well, if you’re sure you are fine we should probably get you washed, but I will tell the vet once we go for your checkup” she sounded irritated…or perhaps angry? Either way she let the issue drop. That was good enough for him.
Mertha light up with understanding “I understand, though I have a bit more of a practical solution. Mirrors opaque.” As soon as she said that a voice sprung out from the corner of the roof.
Martha looked down at him and he just could not resist it any longer. He begun to laugh, not cold or sarcastic. Just the unexplainable urge to let it out “wh—what was that?” he couldn’t stop, perhaps he was not as clear headed as he first assumed.
He tried to force out the words past the laughter “wh--why does it sound--sound so--so silly?”. As Mertha finally understood what was going on she begun to shake as well. It was not quite laughter, but it was clear she was amused.
With one of his hands unavailable and greater exhaustion than he anticipated he had no choice but to ask Mertha for help. It was a bit demeaning, but she was rather quick something he appreciated.
“Well, that might be a bit difficult, but I can compile some new clothes for you soon. It might still be a good idea to wear that for now, it will make it easier to keep your identity hidden from others” that made sense, there were probably someone who had a grudge agist him on the ship. It was nice that he at least could trust Mertha.
Serla was probably not too pleased about his actions, but at least he knew her. Meeting a new affini would mean he needed to analyze a new person. Sticking with Serla would give him an advantage.
He looked up at Mertha and gave his answer “Umm, okay. I think I can at least give it a shot”.
“Now then we should get you some more food before you get more sleep. You have behaved very well so I think you deserve some pancakes” she rushed out of the bathroom and towards the kitchen.
It was quite therapeutic to write some comfort time for Hendrik after I have written him self-destruct and suffer the last 9 chapters. He is far from out of the woods but at least he now has hope.