Go Team Porn 2: The Wrath of Schlock

Chapter firstdraft.txt (MamaClockie)

by Lexinonicon, Modren, Skaetlett, MadamKistulot, HypnoticHarlequin, GigglingGoblin, Kiatight, Creirwy, Doctor D, MamaClockie, Star

Tags: #cw:noncon #D/s #humor #robots

FADE IN:

EXT. SPOOKY ISLAND - NIGHT
A full moon hangs over a bleak starless sky, full of desperation and sadness. Make the camera operator cry. We hear vague PARTY noises with YELLING and MOANING.
We PAN DOWN TO a boardwalk with lots of girls (human), there are DAZZLING LIGHTS everywhere, it is a soft ARKAFORNIA summer, it smells like cigarettes and used clown shoes.
We PASS a girl as she strays to the side, moving away from her friends who are off screen and in a union. She stumbles, pouring her non brand name beer on the planks below her as she stumbles into an alley.
We LOOK AT a shadow on the ground, it is a shadow, like, you draw a shadow, vaguely in woman shape. Mark will do it in editing. We FOLLOW the girl as the shadow approaches, trash littered about the alleyway and spray paint that says things like: 

“WHORE”
“SLUT”
“SLUT”

The GIRL looks at the camera, wearing nothing but clothing on her body.

Girl
Like, who are you? Do I know your name? Why are you dressed in that way? Who are you? What is that you’re holding?

The SHADOW holds up a pocket watch. The GIRL screams in a loud screaming tone.

Reverse SHOT.
A [TBD] is holding up a pocket watch (See above) and swinging it menacingly erotically.
The GIRL screams again in horror.

The TEAM-PRONZ THEME SONG begins.
START CREDIT SEQUENCE - MONTAGE

The CREDIT SEQUENCE is a MONTAGE of SCARY OBJECTS and SUBLIMINAL MESSAGES.
Snippets of MYSTERIOUS PROBLEMS that have been solved with HYPNOSIS WORDS. A SPLICE in the main GROUP. 

EXT. HOUSE
We SEE a LETTER (Male) being DELIVERED to a red painted mailbox. A hand belonging to a GROUP MEMBER (I don’t care pick one) takes the letter from the inside of the mailbox to the outside of the mailbox via applied force.

INT. HOUSE
DUTCH ANGLE SHOT

BALOGNA (PRONOUNCED BALOGNA)enters the room through the door (Red, mahogany wood, elegant curved and medieval era doorknob) and places the letter (Poster Paper, Folded, Small Piece of tape, Clear, Serrated Edges) onto the table (Blue)

BALOGNA (PRONOUNCED BALOGNA)
Hey girls! We got a letter from the letter people!

MINETTE
Whose it from? (Derogatory)

BALOGNA (PRONOUNCED BALOGNA)
from the letter people!

BALOGNA (PRONOUNCED BALOGNA) UNFOLDS the letter to reveal a poster made in Adobe Illustrator™ printed on 8x11 photo stock paper with the chiller font and a red to green gradient with a purple outline and a picture of a college student (girl) having age appropriate fun.
There is ALSO a piece of parchment folded up that FALLS onto the Table. ONYX picks up the parchment and reads it.

VERONICA
It says that the beach party bash college cute girl meet up needs our help, there’s a lady going around causing hypnosis problems! 

MINETTE jumps into ONYX’s ARMS.

MINETTE
College girls getting hypnotized? Like, muh-moh! I’d rather get cheese curls getting stomachized.

MINETTE laughs nervously.

BALOGNA (PRONOUNCED BALOGNA)
We never deny a call for help! Especially a hypnosis-correlated call for help! Gang, we’ve got a hypstery on our hands!

ONYX drops MINETTE in a comical manner, there is dust (Not the silver girl one) all around.

MINETTE
Like no thank you! We’re like, always the one who gets hypnotized and end up in compromising situations!

REMBECCA
Would you do it for a Mini snack?

REMBECCA dangles an indiscriminate non copyrighted Cookie-like object in front of MINETTE. MINETTE is instantly drooling due to intensive offscreen brainwashing in the prequal series as described in the intensive erotic thriller “My Sister is Secretly My Mother and Actually a Trained Hypnotist from Outer Space?”

They make out.

EXT. SPOOKY ISLAND - NIGHT
A full moon hangs over a bleak starless sky, full of desperation and sadness. Make the camera operator cry. We hear vague PARTY noises with YELLING and MOANING.
We PAN DOWN TO a boardwalk with lots of girls (human), there are DAZZLING LIGHTS everywhere, it is a soft ARKAFORNIA summer, it smells like cigarettes and clown abuse.
We PAN UP TO a NAME-BRAND VAN as it enters the general atmosphere of debauchery. There are problems and drinking about. We cannot show anyone actually drinking alcohol but they are drinking near alcohol.
We SEE EACH member of the gang step out of the VEHICLE. BALOGNA (PRONOUNCED BALOGNA), ONYX, MINETTE, REMBECCA, THE FIFTH ONE.

[10 minutes of Actor Improvisation]

BOARDWALK OWNER runs on suddenly, a clipboard in her hand as she jauntily jaunts down the jaunty boardjaunt. She is wearing clothing.

BOARDWALK OWNER
Oh, you must be the ones I specifically requested for help! Would you like a briefer on the case?
[Allan please add detail]

BOARDWALK OWNER
And that describes the situation in its entirety!

BALOGNA (PRONOUNCED BALOGNA)
Alright gang! It’s time we split up and search for clues!

BALOGNA (PRONOUNCED BALOGNA) Looks excited because she

MINETTE
I’d rather search for Booze! (Oh no)

REMBECCA
Would you do it for a Mini snack?

The team splits up.




And thus was the story behind my dad’s homemade banana bread. Let’s get cooking, shall we?

Banana Bread

Ingredients
2 Cups All-Purpose Flour (Sifted)
1 Tsp Baking Soda
½ Tsp Salt
½ Cup Butter (Or Other Shortening)
1 Cup Granulated Sugar
2 Eggs
1 Cup Ripe Bananas (Mashed)
⅓ Cup Milk
1 Tsp Lemon Juice or Vinegar
(Optional) ½ Cup Chopped Nuts
1. Preheat Oven to 350F or 180C.
2. Sift the Flour with the Soda and Salt.
3. Cream the butter and gradually add the sugar. Mix well.
4. Add the eggs and bananas, blend thoroughly.
5. Combine the milk and the lemon juice, let it curdle.
6. Slowly and alternately fold in the flour and milk mixtures, beginning and ending with the dry ingredients. Blend well after each addition.
7. (Optional) Stir the nuts into the batter.
8. Lavishly butter a square pan. 
9. Bake for 1 hour or until the bread springs back when lightly poked in the center.

Banana Nut Bread

Ingredients
1½ Cups All-Purpose Flour (Sifted)
½ Stick Butter
½ Cup Granulated Sugar
½ Cup Honey
½ Tsp Baking Soda
½ Tsp Salt
2 Eggs
1½ Cups Ripe Bananas (Mashed)
½ Cup Chopped Nuts
1. Preheat Oven to 350F or 180C.
2. Cream the butter with a wooden spoon.
3. Add the sugar and honey and beat till creamy and light.
4. Add the eggs, one at a time.
5. Thoroughly mix in the bananas.
6. Sift the flour, soda, and salt.
7. Blend thoroughly into the mixture and fold in the nuts.
8. Lavishly butter a square pan. 
9. Bake for 1 hour or until a knife inserted in the center comes out clean

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