"Oh, Arisa-chan, you're such a klutz I swear!" Flickering light illuminates an otherwise dark room, a row of four knees perfectly lined up as two backs lay still against the bed frame.

"H-Huh? I didn't know there was an official swimsuit for gym class, it's not my fault! Isn't this one cuter, anyway?" Tired eyes scan the yellow text appearing at the bottom of the screen, Iris trying to pretend she has any interest in this vapid anime series her best friend May has been subjecting her to for the past hour and a half. In that span of time the plot has been a slow crawl through mundane school affairs and a home life somehow even more dull. Most of Arisa's problems are solved by her giggling and acting cute, unaware that she was even in a pickle to begin with. 

Knuckles gradually whiten, Iris not realising how tightly she grips her ankles as the annoyance of this bubbly airhead on the screen grazes over her a jagged razor of taunt and jeer. It must be so easy to live in that fictional world an idealised ditz barely able to function and yet never facing any real hardship, no consequences. Iris realises she scorns her so out of jealousy, feeling green with envy over a teenage girl who doesn't even exist. The 21 year old sighs and realises she needs to get a grip, pulling out the small plastic container housing her meds before shoving it back into her pocket and throwing her head back onto the bed. Eyes stare up at a distant sky she knows to be a ceiling much closer, feeling boxed in and wanting so badly to feel that rush of wind on her face that reminds her life isn't always so stale and cramped. 

"Hm? Everything alright, Iris? Are you not enjoying the show? I can put something else on, hehe, I just know that Arisa's antics always cheer me up when I'm in a good mood but uh, different strokes right?" May pushes pause on the remote and drapes her arm over the bed, delicate fingers moving to brush knuckles over Iris' flowing black hair. 

With a light smile at the indirect touch from her closest friend, who knows what she's currently going through better than anyone, Iris turns her head onto its side to face the other. "It's a great show, May, very uh... moe? Hah... it's just not quite my thing, not right now, I think I might head home after all. I don't want to be alone but I don't want to be with people either, kinda fucked right?" The soft butch gives her friend a guilty look after having signed herself up for a long sleepover of watching old slice-of-life anime like the two are in their teens again. Digging fingers into the neckline of faded band tee she's been wearing for the better part of a decade, Iris itches the skin above her collarbone and groans with a reluctance to get up from this comfy paradise of pillows and quilt. Eventually, she stands, pulling her torn jeans back up from where they'd sagged and looking at anything in the room besides May. 

"Hrmm... weeeellll, I was sorta debating whether to actually go through with this or not... but if you're going to continue acting this mopey all the time before something more potent than my anime reminds you how to smile convincingly, I guess I'll at least present the option." Somehow managing to pry herself away from such softness also, May steps over to her bedside table and slides open the drawer while humming a catchy tune Iris vaguely recognises, starting to wonder what song it is but finding herself too prideful... too awkward, to simply ask. 

"Mm? Whatcha got there, May bear?" Peering over her friend's shoulder after taking a few steps closer, Iris gives an embarrassed smirk at her exhumation of the ancient nickname, though she should know that nothing like that could ever hope to embarrass May. The blonde collects cuteness like buffs in a videogame, though unlike Arisa she's hyper competent to a sometimes eerie degree. Appearances can be deceiving and May's is a strong enough ruse to impress even Apate, goddess of deceit and trickery in Ancient Greek myth. That's right, despite her predilection towards hoarding cute things, May's actual career is more serious than a self assigned fuck up like Iris could ever live up to. 

"Definitely not experimental drugs that I snuck out of the lab, out of a deep concern and love for my closest friend. Nope, not at all! Something this cute, bright pink and in my pretty palm, surely they're just candies or something right? Candies always make me less depressed, so maybe these'll work for you too hehe." A sly grin plasters over May's face as she turns around and leans back against the closed drawer, mischievous glint in her eyes that Iris can immediately tell spells trouble. Iris' best friend is something of a scientific genius, though on paper she's only an intern at the lab she toils away at when the sun shines brightly and she's not tucked away in her cave consuming hours upon hours of mind numbing shoujo anime. Truly an enigma of a woman, a prodigy of chemist who never seems to mind that she can't take full credit for her contributions just yet. Iris can't imagine being so selfless, though wonders if a mind like that is just satisfied being provided the instruments to play god with in the first place.

"Uh-huh... are you gonna get in trouble for this?" With a stirring in her chest at the implication that, just maybe, the solution to her sluggish existence sits bagged up in her best friend's palm, Iris realises she's happy to throw caution to the wind if May is.

"It's my creation, I should be able to test it how I please! I'd caution you to only take one a day or you're liable to get a sugar rush, ahaha. Before bed, there's a light sedative effect though ironically you'll also probably be unable to sleep for a good hour or so before it hits. Find something to entertain yourself, I'd recommend--"

"Anime? I... think I'll just veg out to music videos, but thanks... no really, thanks." Iris isn't quite moved to tears, but only because she hasn't felt strong enough emotion to cry since the beginning of the year, gratitude still swelling in her chest as she holds out her hand and watches the small zip-lock bag drop into it. Inside it sits four tablets, hot pink in colour and twice as large as her current prescription meds that have the current registered effects of 'fuck' and 'all'. 

"That'll carry you through 'til Thursday, you can come over again after work then and I'll check how you're doing, take your blood... usual girly things." The close friends share a snicker and Iris has no awareness of the dagger at her back, May's eyes only narrowing when her new test subject pockets the drugs and turns to leave. Iris glances back and May's innocence reappears in a flash, fingers twirling a lock of soft blonde hair betwixt forefinger and thumb. 

"Hey, this isn't gonna like... kill me or whatever, right? How untested are we talking? I kinda like living despite a few recent hiccups, y'know?" Three vulnerable questions, the answers of which both know won't alter her course in the slightest. Once Iris has made a decision she's far too stubborn to be convinced of any other way, even by her own better judgement. Hindsight is the enemy.

May waves her hand dismissively, the young prodigy looking insulted that Iris would even have to ask. "I wouldn't dump 'em on my bestie if I thought there were any serious risks, though I'd appreciate if you noted down any side effects. If you get consistent heart palpitations then maybe get in contact, but otherwise you'll probably be fine! Tested it on rats after introducing them to stressful stimuli, poor guys, and they cheered right up. Hehe, I'm not calling you a lab rat, Iris. You're more like a mouse, sho cyoot~" 

"You're a dork, but I love you. Enjoy your anime and don't stay up too late, someone has to keep making elicit drugs to peddle to their friends right? Do I have to pay you for these? You know I'm flat broke." Already heading for the door as though making her escape from a ruthless loan shark in calico onesie, Iris grabs her studded leather jacket from the hook on the door and finds herself strangely excited to get home for once. 

"You're paying me plenty by letting me test them on you, I always find experimental drugs are the most fun, so I hope you agree. It'd be nice to see you more... fun, Iris." May's smile is a perfect mask that hides her sinister plot, bulletproof visage of deception that even her supposed best friend cannot penetrate with those sleepy blue eyes. "Now get out of my house before I trap you under a pile of pillows and force you to love my Arisa-chan as much as I do, hehehe." 

With a shudder at the image, the mere suggestion of it, Iris grabs her phone and absconds with more motivation in her motion than she's managed to muster in months. The wind raps against her face with brisk little kisses that remind her she still has time to turn it all around. Beaten trainers carry her home and Iris finds herself deflating in the face of the mess that could once be recognised as a living space, her apartment a true reflection of her state of mind as she throws keys onto side table and drops onto her bed in an instantly delivered lethargy. With face buried into her bedsheets, Iris digs ringed fingers into her pocket and retrieves the clear bag of antidepressants. If she's being entirely honest, Iris has more faith in her best friend's unnatural talents than the big name pharmaceutical companies that make the shit in her other pocket. 

"Won't be able to sleep for at least an hour, then I'll be knocked out like a light... doesn't sound so bad, just hope I don't have any weird dreams." Sitting up on the edge of the bed and prying the resealable bag open, Iris shakes one of the obnoxiously vibrant magenta tablets into her palm and sets the rest down beside her, wondering if she should chase it with water given its size but then shrugging impulsively and throwing it back. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Iris hopes she doesn't dream at all.

After lightly choking on the drug and rubbing the tears from her eyes, Iris sardonically considers the fact that she finally managed to cry, deciding it best to be prepared with a glass of water this time tomorrow night so that she does not repeat the foolish antics of her 24 hour predecessor. Most antidepressants are not exactly known for their fast acting properties but she can only assume that one taken at night will be able to break down in her sleep and take effect come morning. It's an exciting prospect when compared to her old prescription which is technically still active, Iris deciding that what her doctor doesn't know won't hurt the bastard. Doc May's in town now and her wildcard energy might just prove a valuable placebo if nothing else. 

"Hrm... what was that tune... it's killing me." Perhaps talking to yourself is a sign of loneliness, a feeling that tends to grip Iris even when enjoying the company of others but really swoops in during her solitude to make mess of her self worth. Like any woman who does not conform to the patriarchy's idealised image of what a 'female' should be, Iris has developed a thick skin and nurtured her ego like a starving plant hailing the sun's rays... and yet, despair is a constant companion tearing its pound of flesh from her flaying soul night after damnable night. Curiosity is as potent as a drug in itself as far as worthwhile distractions come, Iris sitting at her desk and listening through recently played songs while searching for the melody that May had been humming in her room earlier in the night. 

Eventually she gives up, dropping down into bed still wearing her shirt and jeans, only slipping the belt off and peeling out of her socks before she figures this good enough for sleeping. Blue light flickers against her face as Iris unlocks her phone and sends a late night text to her oddball best friend, wagering that the girl is almost certainly still awake glued to Arisa's moe antics like she hasn't aged a day past 15 herself. It's that disarming innocence of May's that makes it so easy for her to manipulate others, and if you're close to her then it's all the easier. 

hey may bear, i need you to set my mind straight. no drugs in this case i just need you to lmk what that song you were humming before i left was, k? thanks in advance, love you lots you terrible weirdo

Dropping phone onto her relatively flat chest, Iris stares up at the ceiling of her apartment and subconsciously pits it against the one in May's room. Before she has the chance to psychoanalyse her constant need for unhealthy comparison as though this bed is her therapist's recliner, Iris feels the buzz of her phone against her chest and watches the screen's light fill the darkness like a beacon bringing her back home. Desperate to sate that gnawing curiosity, the young woman picks her phone back up and reads the text from May with a look of private embarrassment plastered over her face. 

omg ur becoming an airhead just like arisa! my weeaboo dreams are come to life! maybe the drug is screwing with your short term memory or maybe you just dont pay enough attention to my kino, here... 

Following this is a link taking Iris to popular video hosting app, sleepy girl selecting the option to open it and groaning aloud when she remembers where she's heard that catchy melody before. The bright and cheery animation assaults Iris' tired vision and she holds her phone up with a soft sigh of defeat, letting the opening play out in full before realising that May had linked her to a whole episode, the pilot even. Too lazy to do anything else as she's caught between the interstice of a sedative sinking her down into the comfort of her bed and the strange inability to drift off right away, Iris passively watches the first couple episodes of the show, eyes lightly glazing over as she periodically yawns. 

Phone drops onto her chest and continues to autoplay that cutesy audio while Iris finally finds herself drifting into places untold, a dreamless reverie of sleep in which her own thoughts can take a break and her rem induced mind can absorb the shoujo romance anime dialogue unabashed. 

"Oh Arisa-chan, you're not wearing your panties!"

Morning's warming rays spill into the apartment through cracks in the blinds and Iris sits up with a stretch, checking the time to confirm that she slept for just over seven hours and stepping into the bathroom while idly wondering if May's little drug has taken effect yet. When she considers how difficult it usually is to even drag herself out of bed in the morning and how easily she just changed rooms, Iris cannot help but give a small, hopeful smile to the mirror. Not wanting to get too far ahead of herself, Iris completes her mundane Monday morning routine with the usual veil of indifference draped over her slumping form, finding her work clothes and cringing at the creases. If there's going to be any decent indicator that May's drug is actually starting to make significant change it'll be when Iris starts finding the motivation to iron her clothes again. With bitter smile twinged with cautious optimism, Iris dresses herself and makes her journey to the diner just two blocks over where she makes a modest living she mostly wastes on junk food and cigarettes. 

"Hey, look who decided to show up on time for once. You sort your shit out or is this a one off? Shit... is it my birthday?" Iris' boss is wiping down a counter that's already clean, proof enough that this sleepy diner doesn't really need her to show up at all. The older woman appears like she's giving her tardiest employee a hard time but Iris appreciates her more than any other boss who'd have thrown her out onto the street weeks ago without so much as severance. This kind of relationship suits her just fine, though she still feels guilty for being unreliable at best and a downright burden at worst.

"Ah, I didn't realise the time. Does this mean I can work front of house for a change today, for being good?" The butch flattens down her apron and leans elbows over the counter on the customer side, the diner not yet open to the public. "Look, I even did myself pretty for you, Norma." She does her best attempt at an endearing flutter of her eyelashes, half wondering why she even felt compelled to put so much makeup on when it's not at all her style. The kit she used was one May gifted her for Christmas that hadn't been opened until this morning, Iris having felt too polite to return the gift even though she never thought it would see any use.

"With your uniform looking like that? No chance, hon. I'm glad to see you're doing better though, even if your face is giving me whiplash." Norma grins and waves to another one of her staff members rushing inside, Iris internally scoffing at the fact she's not the last one to show up for the morning shift for once. 

"Bleh, that's gotta be a HR violation, I'm off to go piss before the only people more depressed than me start piling into the booths. Mondays are the pits." With a pep in her step, Iris heads into the back and pushes the staff toilet door open with her hip, mulling over her boss's comment about her 'doing better'. If other people are already suggesting as much, just maybe she's not getting her hopes up after all! Allowing herself a small amount of hope, Iris drops onto the seat and unzips her pants, sliding them to her ankles and then hooking fingers into the waistband of her... underwear?

Fingers slide freely over hips, Iris reluctantly peeking down at her lap to confirm that she did indeed forget to put on any underwear this morning, feeling the ditz and exhaling a puff of hot air out of the side of her mouth. Hands glide up over apron and shirt to confirm that she also didn't put a bra on, though she can certainly get away with that on most days. "What the hell..." The woman laughs at her own silly mistake, thinking nothing of it as she finishes her business and rinses her hands in the sink bowl. Taking a moment to inspect herself again, Iris can't help but grin like the dork she is, deciding that this slip up dies with her as she enters the kitchen and forgets about it almost immediately. 

The rest of her shift proceeds as normal, Iris slipping into the usual flow and lamenting the grease stains she got on her apron while stepping out into the open air. Removing her jacket and throwing the top half of the uniform into her bag poorly folded, Iris begins the relatively short walk home in this summer heat. After working in that stuffy kitchen all day and now facing this blistering sun outside, it's no wonder that she spends half the walk fanning herself and hoping she doesn't get sunstroke just as her head is beginning to feel normal again. Lingering stares crawl over the young woman as she makes her way home and she decides to leer at the lecherous passers-by to see how they like it.

Only when she returns to her apartment and sighs in relief at that lovely air conditioning does Iris notice her reflection in the mirror and turn bright red with embarrassment. "Oh my god..." White tee clings to her form, semi-transparent with her nipples stiff and no underwear to obscure that modest chest beneath. Iris had practically been flashing people, inadvertently, her lip quivering at the sight before she bursts into dry laughter and throws herself onto the bed. What a life, she thinks, wondering if such a clumsy affair would have put Arisa to shame and considering texting the story to her friend May before realising that would be a very odd thing to do. 

Peeling out of her clothes, cracking up the air-con, Iris jumps into her shower and rests her back against the tiles. Wondering why she's ever so slightly aroused, having not felt the mood strike in oh so long, Iris traces languid fingertip over the hair above her pubic mound before gently rousing her clit and gasping into warm jets. "Fuck..." This aspect of being properly medicated isn't something May needs to hear about, Iris giving herself some much needed relief as crashing water muffles the sound of her own needy gasps. Before long, she's sitting in the corner of the shower with legs spread, letting her embarrassment and shame over the events of the day drive her into her first orgasm of the year, a crescendo of climax that she rides the momentum of as she spends the next hour working back up again and again. 

Exhausted and buzzing, a debatably fresh Iris steps out of her bathroom and logs onto her pc, wasting away the remainder of her free time online before the alarm on her phone tells her it's time for her next dose. With a lazy grin she can't deny, Iris drops magenta tablet into her palm and remembers to swallow it with water this time, eagerly drugging herself and texting May to let her know there were no obvious side effects for the first day on the experimental medication.

None whatsoever.

Only after settling into bed in the boxer briefs she had meant to wear to work today does Iris remember she needs to wait a while before the sedative carries her off into dreamless corridors of sleep, the woman curling up on her side and opening her phone. What the hell, why not pick up from where she left off last night? Iris smirks, knowing just how ecstatic May would be if she knew her best friend's new guilty pleasure, Iris' pride not letting her admit that she got a little into it last night. Maybe the depression was just making her a downer, she thinks while humming along with the opening tune, but then considers that an awfully wrong thought to harbour. 

Iris finds her lethargy exacerbated by the slow moving slice-of-life anime, almost feeling as though time stops completely as her eyes dull against the bright colours on the screen. Using the pop socket on her phone to prop it up beside her, Iris sinks into the pillow and absorbs the shoujo romance subconsciously, using the silly anime as a sleep aid that replaces dream entirely. Overriding moe antics push into her brain like fingers reaching for her thoughts, making her lips curl pleasantly and softening those rough edges in a slow burn of sublimation. Night after night, Arisa's voice becomes just a little louder.

"That's more eggshell than omelette, Arisa-chan! H-Hey, you can't just laugh your way out of everything you know?" 

"Ehehe, sorry!"

And so a new morning comes, sleepy eyes blinking open to see her phone dead at her side, Iris realising she completely overslept without her alarm and jumping out of bed in sudden panic. "And I did so well yesterday morning... ehehe..." Iris can't help but give a light giggle at her own clumsy mistake, putting her phone back on charge as she skips into the bathroom to brush her teeth and finds the time to apply her make-up even when she's already late. She'd rather look nice and be a little later than she already is if she's already bound for a half-hearted earful from Norma. 

Grabbing her phone and her spare uniform in a dash, Iris sprints out of the apartment building before turning and realising she forgot to lock her door. "Ehehehe..." With some reluctance the woman ascends to the second floor of the complex again and quickly locks up, unable to stop smiling at how much of a mess she's being this morning. "Oh god, I'm acting the klutz... get it together, Iris." Setting down the items in her hands, Iris dramatically slaps both cheeks to wake herself up and only realises how strange she's acting when a pedestrian walking past snickers at her antics. Move it along buddy, she thinks with a sudden scowl more befitting her usual self, this isn't a slice-of-life anime where you're meant to laugh at the cute and charming protagonist. This is real life, and Iris is really late for her shift!

"Well wouldya look what the cat dragged in. I knew your early clock-in yesterday was too good to be true, but hey you're not moping so that's good?" Norma can't decide, as per usual, whether she's annoyed at Iris for being late or concerned for the young woman's mental health. The woman was married to a psychologist for nearly 30 years and so knows better than anyone that even the professionals meant to help you can be colossal fucking wrecks, so any additional support could be just the shoulder someone who's going through it needs. That and she's a self-proclaimed nosy hag, giving tentative smile to her employee who she expects to rush on by instead of...

Iris slams her hands onto the counter and bows her head several times, uniform hooked over her arm and a perfume she never usually wears wafting over the counter. "I'm sorry I'm late! I ah... ehehe... I accidentally let my phone die so I overslept. I'll do better tomorrow, okay? I promise. Pinkie swear me, damnit." Lifting her head with a look of determination in her eyes, Iris holds her pinkie finger out and her boss rolls her eyes, shaking with some reluctance and affording herself a smile at seeing this more girly side of her employee. 

"Yeah, just get your ass in the back and start cutting onion, Mary's being precious about it again." With dismissive wave, Norma sends her employee to the back and smiles over at a customer entering the diner, ready to take the first order of the day. 

Exhaling dramatically and wondering why she had been so nervous about getting in trouble when usually she doesn't care a lick what Norma says, Iris scratches her cheek and groans. More kitchen work, maybe she really does need to get her butt in gear and work extra hard to impress her boss tomorrow if she wants a shot at front of house! 

"I'm being weird..." Iris laughs, shaking her head as she throws the apron over her head and begins to tie it, struggling for a minute and a half before one of her co-workers marches over impatiently. 

"Hey, everything alright here? We're understaffed with Juliet off sick so can you come help already?" It's clear from her tone that Iris' colleague isn't in a good mood, the woman failing to tie her apron trying her best not to sulk and glancing down at the fabric hanging from each hand. "Dude are you serious right now?"

"I can do it like normal, I just wanted to do it in a bow for a change... uh, not sure why. Sorry." With nervous laugh, Iris ties her apron like normal and dodges the glare of her colleague, skipping over to the kitchen area and almost tripping. Only able to take so much embarrassment in one day, Iris is glad for the recovery and finds distraction in her work, chopping onion with expert technique while humming the tune she's had stuck in her head for the past couple days. Her mind goes back to May's favourite show, the girls in that are always presented doing typically feminine things such as preparing food in a kitchen like this, the unapologetic gender conformity with no alternative presentation was one of the reasons Iris felt so uncomfortable watching it when May had initially forced it on her. Now, though, as she glides the knife through onion down onto wooden board... well, Iris realises it's not so bad to take some pride in her work, there's such thing as being too extreme on the other side too. Enjoying cooking doesn't make you a stepford wife. 

The rest of the day goes smoothly as Iris gets into her work in a way that never clicked before, even if she makes a few mistakes along the way she's able to laugh them off awkwardly and nobody seems to dwell on it for too much longer after. Clocking out after the most fulfilling, productive day of work she's ever had, Iris greets the dying sun with a bright smile that only lasts for a few seconds before she questions where it even came from. 

Happy to know she's not being ogled by perverts this time, Iris makes her way home while continuing to hum that catchy tune, carrying herself through the afternoon on autopilot until the time comes once again for her to take that happy medicine she can't deny the effects of. Eager to continue feeling as good as she had over the past two days, Iris takes her third tablet without hesitation, bringing the next episode she's on up almost immediately after she's swallowed. Iris rationalises her new obsession with the anime rather well, reasoning that it's so dull it puts her right to sleep. Tapping along and moving her head to the catchy opening, Iris finds herself relaxing almost immediately and falling into the rhythm that gets easier each and every night. Softly parted lips give way to a line of drool that descends from the corner of her mouth, Iris staring blankly at the moe protagonist's latest misadventure and wishing she could be just as cute and wonderful as Arisa-chan... 

"My greatest asset is my boobs, they're my secret weapon ehehehe." 

"Arisa-chan... we're pretty sure your brain is stored in your chest, it'd explain a whole lot!"

Iris gives an airy laugh into her pillow, drifting off again and fantasising about waking up in an anime world come morning.

The sound of alarm from the woman's phone rings out into the apartment, Iris leaping out of bed and turning it off with determination burning in her eyes. Having slept much earlier, Iris has given herself enough time to get some of those pesky chores attended to before she has to show up for her afternoon shift, humming as she runs vacuum over carpet before spending the next several minutes remembering where she put the iron. Apron, jacket and pants are laid out over the board and Iris finally sees to those humiliating creases, figuring that she'll have absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about at work today now that she's seen to smartening up her uniform. Desperate to make up for her poor showing yesterday, Iris watches a tutorial on her phone teaching her how to tie her apron in a cute bow, remembering why she even wanted something like that all of a sudden. Arisa in her show is always wearing a pretty bow and Iris supposes it must have stuck in her subconscious, like that opening, softly giggling before finally perfecting the bow and celebrating with an over the top fist pump to an audience of none. 

"I didn't used to be this lame, did I..." The woman asks her reflection in a sudden, sobering moment of clarity as she assesses the subtle changes in her demeanour and the effort she's putting in to her presentability. Well, Iris used to put just as much effort into her alt fashion before the motivational issues got in the way, so she's glad to be trying again... just surprised at the sudden shift to a cuter, femme aesthetic. Opening her wardrobe, she finds herself strangely disappointed at the styles on show, a strange thought she tries to push back down popping into her head almost immediately: Arisa-chan wouldn't wear any of this. 

In fact, the woman realises that her current favourite thing to wear is her work uniform now, especially with the bow, her new super special technique! Iris deflates again, finding her thoughts keep switching track like that, if she gets to carried away she ends up thinking, or acting, so embarrassingly moe. Picking up her phone to text May and ask if her antidepressant could somehow have the added side effect of making her think like a ditzy anime protagonist, Iris laughs drily at the absurdity of that and realises she wouldn't be caught dead asking such a ridiculous question. Maybe tonight she should give Arisa a rest for her own sanity and go back to her old ritual of falling asleep to mid noughties music videos. Only, for whatever reason... the idea of that seems so boring to her now.

Slipping into her uniform that looks good as new, Iris can't help but beam with a sudden sense of pride and cuteness, twirling in front of the mirror and wondering passively if she'll have some time after work before the shops close. Her wardrobe could really do with a refresher and it'd be nice to at least have a new outfit for when she goes to May's tomorrow evening. It's funny, May's personality reminds Iris so much of the senpai character Arisa is always leaning on to get her out of a pickle or otherwise simply look up to. Not that Iris is anything like that dumb moe protagonist, but the comparison has her feeling somewhat nervous to meet up with May again... alone, no less! Gosh.

"Iris, honey, you're very unpredictable as of late." Norma watches her wildcard of an employee step into the diner with a clumsy smile after she spent just a little too long trying to pull the door you need to push from that side, the older woman shaking her head tiredly. "And your uniform doesn't look like shit, well colour me impressed, who are you and what did you do with Iris?"

^{"I'm Arisa-chan! Self described idol of Sendai Girl's Senior High!"} "Ehehe, I'm just Iris. Feels pretty good to impress a stick in the mud like you, Norma."

"Well, I suppose you're presentable enough to try waiting a few tables this afternoon, it's quiet enough on Wednesdays." The owner of the local diner looks out at the mostly empty tables, a few customers minding to themselves and a few tables that need clearing by this unpredictable specimen in front of her. 

Iris lights up, blushing brightly and cupping her cheek in adorable show of glee that Norma's not quite sure how to interpret. "R-Really? Oh wow, okay... I won't disappoint you, boss. My training arc begins now... I-I mean uh..." Swallowing drily, Iris chews her lip and clears her throat awkwardly. "Thanks, never thought I'd escape the damn kitchen haha."

"Well you don't leave me much choice after the disaster that was yesterday's shift, I'm worried your cooking will get us shut down if you keep that up. I think you did a better job when you looked like you just got out of bed, no offense."

"Wh-wha... but I thought I crushed it yesterday..." Sulky expression overtakes Iris' face in an almost cartoonish display, the woman of 21 years puffing out her cheeks and then sighing out the air with a short, embarrassed laugh.

^{"That's more eggshell than omelette, Arisa-chan! H-Hey, you can't just laugh your way out of everything you know?"} 

"Ehehe, sorry!"

"It's fine, you're doing that annoying thing my daughter does where it's impossible to stay mad at her, though I'd never expect a scruffy whelp like you to pull it off so well. I'm not immune to psychological warfare, Iris, so I'll take that girlish laughter as penance just this once. Honestly I'd never have put you up front in a million years before, but the way you're acting right now is, and I mean this off the record, a veritable fucking tip magnet. Go give 'em hell, pocket what you get but if any older gentlemen try and give you their number just pass it on to old Norma." The older woman winks and Iris can't help but giggle, an affectatious laugh that should serve her well this afternoon. 

Iris gets to work clearing tables, humming her favourite tune as she whips around the diner like a girl possessed. Raven black hair she usually does nothing with finds itself tied neatly in high ponytail, her jacket unbuttoned just enough to show a tease of cleavage in order to entice the patrons. After all, every girl needs a secret weapon, Iris leaning down with innocent hum as she sets down a plate of fries and gives playful wink to the paralysed pair in the booth she's serving. "Eat up, boys!" 

Turning on her heels and scanning the diner for anybody in need of serving next, Iris locks eyes with her best friend May and finds that cheery smile just won't stop growing. As she approaches, she finds her heart starting to leap just as Arisa's would when approaching her senpai, but Iris tries her best to play things cool. "Hey girl, fancy seeing you here. What can I get you for? Hehe..." 

May looks surprised at the effectiveness of her own handiwork, Iris not realising just how adorable she's become after only a few days of submitting to her drug trial. Satisfaction spreads over the blonde's face, painted red lips curling smugly. "Is Iris on the menu? You look good enough to eat, wow. I'll take proper tests tomorrow but my ocular assessment is passing on all fronts, you've never been so pretty." It's startling that the blonde can have the confidence to air her manipulation so publicly, eyes fixing on the bow tied around Iris' waist and clamping her thighs together beneath the table. A rush of arousal from seeing her butch friend completely change herself for May's own private amusement hits the chemist a drug of its own, May already so glad she decided to pay preliminary visit.

"Ehehehe... stop it, you're so not funny. Uhm... yeah I guess I look pretty good, but I wanted to go buy some new clothes after I get off. Oh, wanna come with and help me pick something out? If you're... If you're not busy, I mean!" The sight of Iris so upbeat when she never acted this way at the peak of her mental health makes May want to get off in a very different way to what Iris speaks of, crossing legs under the table and grinning wide. 

"Oh sure! I can pick some clothes out for you no problem, Iris." She speaks similar words to Iris, close enough that the flustered waitress fails to pick up on the key difference between what she said and how May twisted it, her brain too busy stuck in her chest to properly analyse the situation she's in here. "God, you're adorable. Get me a strawberry shake wouldya?" May's voice is lower than usual, more commanding, Iris' cheeks glowing bright red as she struggles to write the order down on her pad with shaky hand. 

"O-Okay, one shake and uhm... a-anything else?" Iris feels herself burning up, her senpai called her adorable, that's just... wait, no that's not right. May is just her friend, her closest friend sure but not... gosh, what's going on in her silly head today? The waitress laughs, an airy giggle that must appear to come out of nowhere to anybody paying attention to her, though right now she only cares about senpai's attention. 

"No, that's good, girl." The customer enjoys a front row seat to Iris' own mental takeover, old personality offered as oblation to the moe cocoon cracking in her soul. A new altar is erected in the subject's mind against her will, every pill a prayer that removes not only the negative thoughts, but all those that don't fit into the Arisa-chan shaped hole in her heart. 

"G-G-Good girl... I mean, I mean ah... ahahaha, that'll be ready in no time just s-sit tight ma'am!" Her chest feeling like it's going to burst, Iris bows unnecessarily and then practically runs into the back, collapsing out of sight with hands resting on her knees and a deep crimson covering her face. Iris realises how strangely she's been acting, but it no longer occurs to her to view the changes as a negative. Change is an inevitability in an ever turning world, right, and she shouldn't be so ungrateful... 

When Iris emerges from the kitchen, shake in hand, she locks eyes with her senpai and returns a flustered smile. "Did... did you mean it when you called me adorable? Nobody's ever... I mean, that's just so weird to hear, given how I am, y'know?" More a sundae than a shake, Iris sets down the glass housing a monstrously calorific treat and wonders how her senpai manages to keep herself in shape with such habits. 

"Hm? And how are you? To me you're acting cute, you're dressed cute, you've even started talking in a softer tone and don't even get me started on the giggling. My, you're acting just like Miss Arisa-chan aren't you? That just makes it even more adorable, I never realised you were such a girl before, guess this must be your true self. So moe~" Infectious words make a mess of Iris' sense of self, teeth threatening to break the surface of her lips as she tries and fails to deny senpai's words... then wonders why she's even trying to reject the way she is.

"My... true self?" Iris stands in a state of profound epiphany, covering her mouth with a hand that carries itself more delicately than it ever has before and giggling away her apprehensive thoughts. "Guess so, I guess it's better to be an airhead than a deadhead, right senpai?" 

May's eyes widen and she grips her shake tight, so flush with arousal that anybody could see it, anybody besides Iris whose perception is forced into such a narrow tunnel that doesn't play by the same rules as the real world. The drug has cracked her mind wide open and in turn, her ego has absorbed a shoujo romance world as its new reality. Anime becomes her, Iris feeling better for it, wanting so badly for her senpai to call her cute again as she hovers over her like a needy puppy. 

"You're so right, Arisa-chan."

Twilight fingers caress her calf as Iris stretches in her room, feeling so lightheaded it's liable to make her lose her footing. Such a clumsy girl, May had to keep reining her in during their shopping date, the moe girl's eyes glancing back at the outfits on her bed and a part of her knowing the old Iris would have thrown up at the suggestion she wear any of these. It's just so hard to care about who she used to be when Iris is having so much fun in her new, strange expression. 

"Push up bra... well my boobs are my greatest asset, so..." A ditzy grin replaces Iris' doubt and she sprawls out onto the bed with her knees pointed inwards and feet spread far apart, digging into the packed shopping bag to retrieve her new pyjamas. Inspired by the shake she had to secretly get Iris' help finishing off, much to the flustered waitress' not so secret delight in sharing a straw with her senpai, May picked out some strawberry patterned pjs that Iris holds with dull reverence in her wide eyes. 

Slipping into the cute pyjamas is an instant blow to the former state of self, the woman she had once been. Her id, ego and superego all become as malleable and soft as the girl's pretty breasts in which they're surely kept safe, soft pink material brushing over the bare skin and so smoothly destroying the former Iris. Her ruination is consummated by wanton fingers digging into slick heat, breathless giggles that come out so girlish and sweet, toes curling into the sheets unable to tether her to reality all the same. 

"I'm so anime... hehe..." Iris holds the final tablet up in the air, focusing on it with one eye scrunched shut and long string of giggles making it hard for her to remain still. "May bear... you're fu... messing with my head, aren't you? Oh well, th-that's what senpai's are for... I'm an idol so... so I deserve new clothes and attention from boys and from girls too... especially girls... especially you, senpai." The tablet drops and Arisa-chan swallows it eagerly, washing it down with the half empty water bottle senpai had given her before they parted for the night. Arisa blushes dark red as she considers the indirect kiss, having never contemplated how lewd and amazing something so simple as a water bottle could be until her sense of reality was ripped away from her in favour of a new world she now occupies. Iris considers the backwash, dreaming of senpai's spit as she pushes the bottle to her lips and moans into it, vision blurring from how turned on she's getting from something so embarrassing. Kicking her legs against the bed, Iris thrusts hips against clumsy fingers and mewls all night long until the sedative has her collapsing into a sticky mess atop her sheets. 

"Arisa-chan, you're kind of a slut! Everyone in school thinks so, someone even etched it into your desk! Gonna cry?"

"Hm? Ahahahaha, really? Well, I guess if I was senpai's slut... it wouldn't be so bad!"

Thursday came around so quickly, and at the same time, Iris feels like she's lived a lifetime since that fateful day when May first gave her the drug she's been hooked on for days. The girl isn't sure she could ever feel depressed again, so it certainly did the trick, but as she stands before her bedroom mirror in a completely new style of dress, with new posture and demeanour and voice... it occurs to her just how much more the tablets gave her... and just how much they took, too. 

"You look adorable, Iris." She proclaims to herself in the mirror with a glossy smile, having tried to dress as cute as possible in an attempt to get her senpai's attention. Baby pink mary jane demonias give way to long white socks that stretch up past her knees and end in frills, Iris bending her legs a couple of times to admire the way they look. While humming the theme tune to her new existence, Iris adjusts the white and pink plaid skirt that hangs from her waist and strikes cute pose in that peony tube sweater she just adores. Senpai even bought her some adorable non-prescription glasses with wide, circular lenses that make her eyes really shine. 

After completing the look by dolling herself up in front of the mirror, soft pink makeup to match her outfit, Iris jumps up from her stool and grabs her white leather shoulder bag, wondering just how much all of this must have cost before giggling away the thought. 

The walk to May's house is a little further than the journey she takes to work, but not by much, Iris taking a few clumsy stumbles attempting to walk in these new shoes but eventually getting the hang of it and finding a comfortable, cute gait by the time she arrives at the ivory house that appears all too innocent from the outside. The inside is even more deceptive, Mays' den of depravity disguised as one of soft comfort. As Iris rings the doorbell with a nervous smile, May's footfalls down the stairs make the girl's heart all aflutter. "Oh boy oh boy oh boy... you've got this, Iris." The private prep talk definitely not spoken directly into intercom is well delivered and helps calm Iris' nerves just as the door swings open to her senpai's home. 

"There you are, Arisa-chan, you're looking so yummy today. You don't mind if I call you that, right?" A sharp smile greets Iris at the house's entrance, the raven haired woman far too deep into the gradual brainwashing of her mind, her perception of the world around her so malformed, that she doesn't register the predatory maw she steps right into. The giggles simplify her, condition her into little more than a pretty cosplay toy for her best friend's enjoyment. 

"Ehehe, why would it? That's my name!"

"There, how's that? I... I rewrote the entire thing to focus more on the moe transformation and I think it had more time to breathe and, and--"

"Hmhm~ May's turn wasn't a bad departure from April's, I'll admit, but I'm not sure if it's the best you can do. Are you truly happy with this rewrite, do you think it's good enough of an offering for your goddess? Only the best, right? Your fingers aren't yet too calloused to write for me, pretty, so why don't you go ahead and give the readers what they want? Always so keen to wrap things up with a punchy one liner and call it a day, while depriving us all of the dessert we so deserve."

"Oh uh... right! You want the scene afterwards, where May takes advantage of the new moefied toy, the slut she made her best friend Iris into? You want a sex scene, a reward at the end like the bubblegum at the bottom of an ice-cream?"

"The... what? Is that a British thing? In heaven we never reach the bottom of the cone, the fluffy moreish vanilla never ceases to replenish~ Do a good enough job for Angel, and perhaps I'll show you one day.... Tara."

"Y-Yes Goddess. I'll... I'll give you what you want, a begging toy too lost in fantasy to deny the wants of her immoral owner. I'll write that and then, then you'll--"

"Shush now... and feel my arms wrapping around yours, guiding hands and directing fingers. You will write for me, child, go ahead and do me proud~"

And so, the writer writes. 

"Mmgh... you're too mindfucked to even care about me being candid with you, eager to rationalise any of my words to fit the scene of the show so deeply burrowed into your psyche~" May straddles her new Arisa-toy, the moe girl's back pressed against bedroom wall, chest rising and falling dramatically. Entire body sweltering hot from the way senpai suddenly came onto her, Arisa gives in to every teasing word, every little touch. 

"I-I ah... senpai~ Is my body to your liking?" Fantasy becomes her, engulfs her, feasts upon the woman who once occupied her body that now only exists as humiliating pleasure toy. May's satisfaction is intoxicating, Iris mesmerised by just how possessive her best friend is being that she can't keep a solid hold on where she is, who she is. 

"God, that's so fucking cute... and embarrassing, I can't wait to play with you in public while you're like this. Truly shameless, it's turning me on so much, that earnestness in the silly things my drug has you saying like it's fucking normal" Suckling mouth clamps around Iris' lower neck, near her shoulder, May determined to mark this property her own with hot tongue falling sultry against slick skin. So debaucherous, so rough, Arisa overwhelmed and unable to keep tight hold on any single fantasy. 

One moment she's Iris buckling in breathless pleasure as her best friend uses her body like a disposable toy, wondering how the hell things got to this point and gnawing a hole into her lip. The next moment, she's Arisa-chan, losing herself to senpai's affections and getting drunk off of the touch, reminding herself to change the etching on her desk tomorrow morning so that it correctly states herself as not just any slut... but senpai's slut. And then, in a flash, she's the writer, curling toes into the bedsheets and staring up with wide moe eyes at the object of ultimate desire. Angel's lips descend upon her own after leaving a hickey to brand the pretty slut, unrivalled tongue forcing the toy's into submission and compelling it to type such humiliating things.

"I'm going to fuck you now, okay silly?" Speaks the voices of May, Senpai and Goddess Angel, a harmony of harsh and benevolent speech that has the three women in their grasp experiencing a constant freefall into submission. Some rabbit holes never give way to wonderland, leaving Alice to fall forevermore.

"Please! Please... I-I'll be good for you, so... gosh, am I really that wet already?" A never ending cacophony of giggles scores the soundtrack to the pathetic girl's new existence, animated hips lifting up eagerly with legs splayed out, offering a moreish moe cunt May could never truly tire of. I contemplate whether this new vessel, more so than the last, is enough to placate my goddess as she pushes fingers deep inside and curls. Whines are promptly elicited from the mouths of fantasy, reality and fiction. 

"So easy, so cute... you really are the perfect package, you can even cook my meals for me provided I don't mind a little food poisoning. Aha, perhaps you're really only good for one thing... having your brains fucked out and watching them spill over the bed, night after night until all you can think about day in and day out is the taste of pussy on your tongue. Until the only word that spills from your mouth is 'more', succumbing to the intensity of touch more than you concern yourself over the longevity of thought. Thought is a dream, and you've not dreamt for days." May's fingers pump in and out of her toy, the cute thing smearing its new outfit with spit as it fractionates itself between every word of its owners haggard speech, thoroughly fucking its own mind in collaborative effort as the lovedrug dissolves in its mouth sublingually after being transferred from May during their kiss. 

Intensity of feeling, reduction of thought. Iris tries and fails to recall how she let herself become nothing but a cutesy toy, a piece for May's collection, and then she asks herself... one final thought, the last stand in the face of complete mental rewrite...

When did May become her best friend, again? 

THE END

A-Again, goddess?