Skim or whole, or 2%? Should I even be drinking cow’s milk? Soy, almond, hemp, coconut, oat.

I knew it should be an easy choice, but nothing was an easy choice for me. What kind of milk to buy, what to have for dinner, what to do with my life… For me, every choice was hard, there was so much to consider, so many implications, so many consequences. What if I make the wrong choice? What if I say the wrong thing or buy the wrong thing or do the wrong thing. No, it was worth moving through life with intent, I just need to get a little better at it, that’s all. I just needed to work harder at it.

I spent the walk home thinking about all the things I needed to do this week. I needed to reply to emails, to open mail, to book an appointment with my hair stylist. I needed to get my roommate a present for her birthday. I needed to apply for more art jobs. I needed to clean the apartment.

“Hey Lily, I’m back,” I called out to my roommate as I opened the door. “How’s the track going?” She was an electronic musician, and had stumbled into some new idea right before I left.

I set the groceries down and started to put the cold stuff away. Lily was markless, like me. She didn’t seem to mind though, and said she likes the freedom, the thrill, that she gets to make her own destiny. I’m the opposite. I’ve always wanted a soulmate, ever since I was young. It sounded so nice, to just know, for certain, who you’re meant to be with. I guess I’m just cosmically destined for uncertainty though. It kinda made sense; how could the universe know who I needed to complete me if I couldn’t even decide which milk to buy?

I finish putting the groceries away, plopped down on the couch, and got my phone out. A new friend request on Instagram from Catherine Bell. The name didn’t ring any… well, bells.

Mere moments after I hit accept, I got a message from her.

I think you’re my soulmate. Madeline Riley right?

I scream.

“S-s-s-soulmate?” I show her my phone. The concern on her face is replaced with excitement.

My phone goes off again, I have a new notification, but we’re too busy looking for my mark to pay it any attention.

“M-maybe it hasn’t shown up for me yet? Do they always show up at the same time?”

“What why?!” I don’t exactly love being seen by people.

I gulped. She was right, we hadn’t, and I hadn’t even considered that yet. Sure 23 is old to get a mark, and I know that’s usually when the more… extreme… marks show up, but that’s not me. I mean sure, I read some kinda kinky smut from time to time, but that’s just a fantasy, nothing more. I’d only had a few relationships and none of them had involved kink.

I started to pull my hoodie off, revealing my plush figure. I was, I guess smallfat is the term I’ve seen other people use. Mid size? Chubby? I’m not sure, I try not to think about my body very much. I don’t exactly think I’m hideous or anything, but I’ve never really liked my body.

“Nope.” She pulled at my bra a little bit to make sure it wasn’t hiding underneath.

“Pants too!”

“Maybe you really don’t have it yet.”

“Wait, is that-” She pulled my panties to the side. “Oh, that’s- uhhh…”

fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

“Madeline, I promise everything will be okay.” She handed me her phone and embraced me in a hug.

Catherine Bell’s Pet.

A metallic taste in my mouth. Adrenaline. My heart beating a thousand beats a minute. I was frozen with anxiety. How could this be happening to me? A pet? A pet ? I hated being out of control. I couldn’t stand it. I had to be in control of everything. Everything had to be just the way I liked it. It had to be perfect, it had to be correct and I had to be the one to do it. I needed to be in control.

And why was it just text? Weren’t soulmarks supposed to be like, pictures? Or some kind of imagery? This looked… weird. It wasn’t that deep, unreal black that everyone else’s soulmarks were. I didn’t think I’d ever seen one that looked like this: rough, a deep brown with a black outline, it was almost like…

No. Nononono. No. It couldn’t be…

What did that mean? A brand? What kind of a pet has a brand? A brand?

1 new message from Catherine Bell.

It was a picture of her forearm. There among the other tattoos on her sleeve was…

It was a glass bottle.

Owner of Madeline Riley