Lindsey's talking about... something. GirlCon, maybe? I don't much listen. I just kinda nod through it. I set up the meeting because Kam asked me.

Lindsey's always been something like a kid sister to me, even back when we first became Magisorcerers. She was always so dedicated, so fierce.

Like me, she held herself to an impossible standard. I get why she quit. Another girl stepped into the role, called by the Guardians of Light to uphold goodness and virtue. And she became a cop who never recovered from being so powerless.

So weak.

I thought for the longest time I failed her.

I see through different eyes now, the scales having fallen. She failed herself.

I don't have to feel bad anymore.

That's good. This is all good.

I reach a hand across the table and lightly circle it around her wrist. Lindsey pauses.

"I have to use the restroom, Lindsey, I'll be right back."

I stumble into a stall as my not so little traitor tries to escape up my throat again.

It doesn't want to be there, but I need it. I'm better this way. I begin an expulsion incantation, holding the power on the edge before inverting it.

I lock it in place, and my stomach settles.

Spectacular.

It's been like this from the night that Kam cut me off. Ever since, it's like it wants me to be close to her; but every moment its in me I just feel...

Quiet.

I'm quiet for the first time. Just myself and what I desperately need. I can't get rid of it. I'd be a fucking idiot to try. I need it.

It's a better alternative to conflagration, which is what I'm sure would happen if even a whiff of what I'd done got out. Hell, I'm not even sure talking to Lindsey is a good idea.

I can't not, though: Kam asked for my help.

And it gives me an opportunity to see what she knows about Kam and I.

So I sit back down across from her and pretend to be big sis. I listen to her go on about policing, and men, and every subject under the Sun.

It's only when she's been going for an hour that I check my phone, and smile. The screen's dark, but she doesn't need to know.

We're both playing pretend.

Lindsey freezes, studying my reaction.

I think about how well Kam's tongue felt as it danced across my clit, summoning a flush in my face that I hope will play as bashful. "What?" I say, injecting equal parts warmth and coyness.

"You're blushing," Lindsey says.

"Oh! Yeah, it's nothing."

"It's not..." Lindsey trails off.

I furrow my brow. I pretend sincere concern as I reply "it's not what?"

"It's not her, is it? The Consuming Sin-Viper."

I don't conceal the laugh that breaks free from my throat. What a ridiculous name Desdemona gave her...

Especially knowing how soft Kam is.

"Yeah, we reconnected after everything that night," I say.

Lindsey blinks at me, incredulity swirling through her mind like a hurricane. It upends everything. "You..." She shakes her head, grimacing at me. "You 'reconnected' with her? What does that mean?"

"It means she was a victim, Lindsey."

Lindsey reels back as if struck by the words. "I— But— Ty, She almost—!" If Lindsey wasn't trying to ruin my life in an attempt to get to Kam, I'd almost feel bad at about the way she's apoplectic and spluttering right now.

"She's like a kid sister to me," I remind myself.

Fine. I'll play nice.

"Yes, she did. And that was... unfortunate, bu—"

"Unfortunate?!" Lindsey's voice climbs in octave and volume; were I still the woman I was before, I'd have cringed. There's people in this cafe beside us. People who'd know me without my sunglasses and hat.

"Lindsey Marie Calligan," I reprimand.

She leans forward. "I'm sorry," Lindsey whispers, her voice dripping venom, "I'm just having a hard time understanding how you can forgive the woman who almost killed you."

"She was brainwashed. She didn't have a choice, and she's lived a good life since. She's a good person."

Take the bait.

"No, she isn't! She can't be. She's a monster, Tiana, pure and simple. Just because the world forgave her doesn't mean I do."

Perfect.

"And that's why you asked her to speak against Desdemona getting out, right?"

Lindsey mouth opens and closes twice, then audibly clicks when she snaps it shut.

"You want to forgive her, too, but you can't because you think it's going to hurt me," I say, my caring words belying how much she's getting played.

Lindsey shakes her head. "No. No I don't. I won't ever forgive that bitch for what she did to you. I saw it."

My lips pull into a contrite frown.

"They used us. The Guardians of Light. The Magisorcerers' Guild. We were used, Lindsey. We were kids when we started," I say. "We were kids, and we watched horrible things happen and they told us that if we looked away for a moment, then everything would end.

Why didn't they make more of us?

Why didn't they care for us? Why do you and I still have to work after a life of service and paparazzi and agents and ministers? I forgave Kam because she's a victim... but so are we."

Lindsey's eyes water, and I can tell she's about to crack open. She's vulnerable. I take her hand, and smile.

"You're a victim, Lindsey, and I love you all the same," I say. She weeps softly as the minutes pass. She's gone from here and now, down into an abyss of the horrors she's done so well making manageable.

The one we all had to, to survive in the aftermath of a war. She found rage to deal with hers.

It kept her some modicum of sane, even as it morphed into a kinship for and appreciation of brutal, violent authoritarianism. She used to be so sweet, but now all that remains is a bitter, little woman wondering how it all went so wrong.

I wasn't so different. That's also why I'm here. A reminder.

"I'm sorry," she says, finally. "I'm so sorry. I wasn't fast enough to stop it, and you..." I glide around the edge of the table, and pull her into a deep hug.

"It's okay, it'll all be okay. I'm here, okay? I'm not going anywhere and you're okay." I say the words with as much gentleness as I can.

Lindsey collapses into me. The moment I feel her about to wail, I teleport us away.

Didn't know I could do that.

There's a park nearby. We end up on a bench, my arms wrapped around her. I cradle her as begs for absolution.

I give it to her. Lindsey Marie Callligan's a hero, you see.

When she leaves, she thanks me. I know what happens next, though: she's going to get home, and the embarrassment will set in. She'll get angry. First at herself, then at me... and then at Kam.

She'll dig herself in deeper, and do exactly what I need her to do: she'll free Desdemona for me.