"Can I get you anything? Sparkling water? Flat?" The receptionist's voice is perfectly pleasant. If I didn't know better, she'd pass for a friendly face. Her eyes fight not to move. Her smile is a bit too wide. Every part of her face is tight with the exertion of feigned niceties.

"We're good," Rax says, "thank you, though!"

The receptionist nods her head. "Okay! Miss Mackey, um— Tiana will be with you shortly."

The reverence with which she says Tiana's maiden name tells me enough: she's a groupie, parasocially guarding turf. If she knew half of what I know about Tiana...

But that's the past. I'm not here to win back Tiana's love. How can I? It's not like I even had it to start. No, Rax and I are here because getting Tiana to speak against Desdemona getting out is our best shot; maybe in reality it's our only shot. Nobody listens to a monster.

Rax squeezes my hand.

I must look as anxious as I feel, and I reassess whether that receptionist is actually a toxic Tiana fan. I have a habit of jumping to the worst, wrongest conclusions about people. That it's backed up by a lifetime of people generally being shit does nothing to help me relax around new people.

We wait another few minutes before the receptionist takes a call. She nods into the phone and does a small wave to get our attention. She says something hushed into the phone, then hangs up. She gives that too-wide smile again: "Tiana'll be out any minute."

Another squeeze of my hand from Rax.

I squeeze it back, and I must be squeezing too hard because Rax hisses "Kam. Your claws."

I loosen my grip. Even with them cut short, they're still painful enough if I'm pressing them this intently into someone. "Sorry," I whisper back.

He pats my hand with his other. "It's okay. Breathe."

I try to suck in some oxygen to remain present and not an anxious mess, but then I catch some movement. It's her. I know it. My eyes train onto her like it's the most natural thing in the world.

Like I'm meant to be staring at her this intently. My tail stirs. Just the tiniest little quiver.

I'm such a jumble of pain and nerves, though, that even that's muted. I watch her moving toward us, and it's my body that jolts me out of it by inhaling deeply of its own accord.

Just the sight of her stole the breath from my lungs. She looks beautiful and at ease, almost gliding as she approaches.

Tiana stops about ten feet away. "Hey, come on back," she says. It's so light, so natural compared to the woman I knew that my scales frill a little — like hackles on a bird. I'm wary all the way to her office. She's being too polite for the way I treated her.

Rax and I sit.

"I'm sorry," she says.

"I regret the way our last... conversation ended," Tiana continues. Next to me, Rax clears his throat. Loud. Conspicuous. It gets Tiana's attention, and she regards him with a bewildered, if amused, smile on her face.

"He knows," I sigh.

"About...?"

"Us. That we..." I gesture between her and I.

Tiana shrugs. "Have been carrying on an illicit sexual affair that would be scandalous at best, and potentially ruinous for both of us at worst?"

Ouch.

She delivers the words so blithely that I'm rendered speechless for a long moment. "Yup," is all I'm able to mumble out, and silence descends.

Rax takes in a deep, audible breath. "We're here abou—"

"About Desdemona," Tiana says, nodding. "My assistant told me. It's concerning for sure."

"Which..." Tiana's eyes flick over to me, and then her head moves after. The effect is disconcerting. I feel suddenly naked, and my mouth goes dry.

I swallow spittle that might as well be sand for the lack of moisture, and power onward. "Which is why we came to you. She might get out, and um... well, people are scared of her."

"Monsters, you mean," Tiana says, and it's like she's feigning her emotions. Not in the perfect way she did before.

It's like she doesn't have any, and is doing the best approximation of "caring" that she can.

And I did that to her. I freaked out and shut her down so bad that she can't even process any of this. She's just cold now. Unfeeling.

"Yes. Her victims," Rax says.

Tiana nods, pretending to deliberate.

I expect the hammer blow of her rejection. "How can I help?" she says instead. I glance to Rax. He seems just as stunned as I am, but I recover first.

"Can you go to her hearing? Argue against her release?" I hate how hopeful my voice sounds as I say the words. This is stupid. She's not gonna—

"Of course I can."

Oh.

Tiana gives me a wry smile. "What? You thought I was gonna say 'no' to you?"

"Y-yeah. Kinda. I mean, the Magisorcerers are all about forgiveness and—"

"And I forgive, but she's a menace. To you, to others. There's no way I'm gonna help her get out."

I sigh.

"But..."

My stomach plummets, a meteor crashing to earth. Tiana turns toward Rax. "I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name."

"Draxus of Kjel'Doran," Rax extends his hand. Tiana takes it.

"Draxus of Kjel'Doran, can I have a moment alone with Kam?" Maybe she's not faking every emotion, given her licentious tone.

"Oh." He's disappointed before comprehension dawns on him. His eyes go wide and he grins. "Oh!" He glances to me, giddy. "Of course!"

Rax misreads what this is. He doesn't know her as well as I do. Before I can protest, he's withdrawing from the room... and I'm alone with Tiana.

I stare at the door, wishing I could tell Rax to come back.

"What do you think he thinks is gonna go on in here?" Tiana asks.

I turn to face her, and she's staring at me like I'm meat. She stands and saunters around the desk before hopping up on it.

She's wearing a skirt today.

"I mean, you'd have to be real quick," she says, her legs parting ever so. I'm drawn to the movement, despite part of me screaming about how wrong this is. We have things we need to discuss.

She kissed me. What does that mean?

I'm so confused.

And worse, I'm still so attracted to her.

I slip out of the chair and onto my knees. I wanna be better than this, but...

But I know, deep in my core, that I want this. I'm going to get burned. I'm not naive.

I bury my face between her legs anyway. She lets out a deep, dark chuckle as I tease and lap and suck.

Maybe it's better this way.