Birth of an Analyst

Part 6

Not for those under 18 (or whatever the legal age for this sort of stuff is in your area). If you’re not that old, Boo! Go away now. If you are offended by graphic descriptions of sexual activities, especially non-consensual ones, then don’t read this. All characters and situations are fictional.

Copyright 2022 greyscribbler@yahoo.com

Archived on the Read Only Mind web site by permission of the author. This story may be downloaded for personal archiving as long as this notice is retained.

“So how might a subject react to their new behaviours?”

“Why would you want to know that?” Madison asked, shifting uncomfortably in her seat. She was still sore from having spent the night with the dildo embedded in her arse. But it was a delicious sort of soreness, the one that made you stretch and squirm while remembering just how good it had felt.

Madison shifted in her seat again, this time a pleasant tingle seeping through her from her arse.

Madison froze. Ethan was looking at her. Oh God. What was I thinking? Maybe he knows! She wanted the floor to swallow her up. She was sure that her cheeks were blazing. She didn’t know what to say.

“Uh, Madison?”

She had to say something. Anything. Maybe she could cover it up. “Um, this is about identifying unethical behaviour in whoever is running an experiment, there wouldn’t be any one monitoring the subject. If there was, no-one would try anything bad.”

Heart in her mouth, Madison looked up at her fellow PhD student. He wasn’t saying anything. He looked like he was thinking.

Please, God let him be thinking about what I said. Don’t let him think about what I did. Please, please, please.

“Right,” Ethan nodded after a time. “But a subject’s own reactions might help them identify a situation like that. So I could suggest adding notes to participant instructions to be alert for situations that made them feel certain ways.”

“I suppose,” Madison allowed, releasing the breath she’d been holding. Maybe she had gotten away with it. She sagged in her seat in relief. Then caught herself. She couldn’t risk anything that might make him suspicious. So she needed to focus on what they were talking about. Not the distracting but oh-so-pleasurable flashes from her arse.

Madison could see the sense of putting in warnings like he’d described. If Ethan ever did write it up. She’d never seen any actual drafts of this chapter. “Well, there’s a range. Confusion at the new behaviours. Possibly embarrassment or shame.” Like me and-. Something clamped down on Madison’s thoughts. She wasn’t going to think that. There was no way there was any link between her nightly activities and her discussions with Ethan. Impossible. Not even worth thinking about.

So impossible that she forgot she had thought about it.

Ethan was waiting attentively for her to go on. He was definitely looking at her, a mix of expectation and what might almost be trepidation on his features.

Probably just making sure he covers everything. That sounded right. Certainly better than… Madison wasn’t sure what it was better than. But it was definitely better.

“So, yeah, anyway,” she hurried on, covering up her odd silence. “That sort of thing.”

Ethan considered her response for moment. “Embarrassment huh? Would that make escalation harder?”

“It could. But addicts are often ashamed of their own behaviour. It can sometimes help them stop. It depends on the strength of the addiction. Of course, they may also try to justify their own behaviour. In this case maybe perform it away from the experimental setting to normalise it. Addicts can be defensive about the behaviour or alternatively they can even flaunt it. Although shame and embarrassment are often the source of both those reactions.”

“Right, right,” Ethan nodded, the mannerism so familiar now. Something about it almost made Madison feel sleepy. “Drop for me, Madison.”

Hmm, embarrassment, Ethan pondered after he’d moved them to one of the meeting rooms and had Madison strip. Her body was truly amazing. He couldn’t see Madison flaunting what he was getting her to do. Probably best to check. “Would you tell anyone else about fingering your arse?”

“No!”

Ethan started in surprise at the force of the girl’s reaction. For a moment he thought he’d broken her trance. He had to fight an instinct that wanted him to dive for the door. But Madison stayed in her chair, her eyes glassy, her breathing gradually settling back into a deep, even, rhythm.

Not parading it around then. It was only what he’d expected.

“Are you embarrassed about fingering your arse until you cum?”

“Yes,” the girl replied, her cheeks flushing red but this response nowhere as vehement as the previous one.

Right. Probably didn’t even need to ask that.

“When do you get embarrassed?”

“Talking to people,” the girl muttered, almost as if she was reluctant to admit that, even deep in her trance. “Around people. Worried they might know.”

Ethan couldn’t see how they would, especially given her first response, but embarrassment wasn’t always about logical conclusions.

“And the same about using the dildo? You feel embarrassed about that?”

“Yes!” the girl replied emphatically. Then her voice fell to almost a whisper, her cheeks flushing. “So embarrassed.”

She really does look cute like that. “What about when you’re alone? When you’re doing it?”

“Not so much,” Madison replied. “Feels so good,” she added, a smile ghosting across her features.

“That’s right,” Ethan smiled back, even though the girl wouldn’t register his expression. “It’s arousing, isn’t? Remember how good it feels.”

His smile broadened as Madison squirmed in her chair.

Okay. So. Do I get her over her embarrassment? That might make it easier to keep her progressing. But if she became too accustomed to her new behaviours she might lose her reluctance to share them. Which meant she might look for a partner that wasn’t him. Ethan didn’t want that. As she was now, Madison was so much easier to control.

And squirming in embarrassment really was an attractive look for her.

“How did it feel fucking your arse with that dildo last night?”

“Good,” the girl replied, her checks still flushed. Ethan wondered if it was arousal or embarrassment. Probably both, he decided as the girl continued. “I came.”

“That’s right,” Ethan smiled. “You came. You came so hard. Remember that. Remember how good it felt. Letting your mind go so deep, down and down, thoughts all gone, just remembering.”

Ethan let Madison wallow in the recollections for a while before deciding to continue.

“You cum from having your arse fucked. It feels so good to have your arse fucked. It turns you on. It’s so good to cum from having your arse fucked. Repeat that for me.”

“I cum from having my arse fucked.” There was real eagerness in the girl’s voice, her hips gently undulating. Ethan could just imagine what that plug had done to her. “It feels so good to have my arse fucked. It turns me on. It’s so good to cum from having my arse fucked.”

“Again,” Ethan ordered. There might have been no hesitation, but he didn’t want to take chances. “Until I tell you to stop.”

Madison did exactly as she was told. With each repetition her breathing deepened, her eyelids fluttering, hips undulating. Ethan wondered if she was going to cum just from the memories.

“We’ll let this stage settle in. But then I’ll get you to try something different.”

A few nights later, Madison stood in front of her computer, naked. There was nothing unusual about that. Or the lubed-up dildo she held in her left hand. At least she didn’t see anything unusual about it, even if it was still a little embarrassing even when alone. Nothing like what she felt when the fear reared up in her that someone might realise what she was doing. She didn’t want to think about that now, the prospect of the pleasure she was about to experience evoking a spreading warmth from her centre. She was accustomed to the use of the dildo now, looked forward to it, the thought of it felt filling up her arse filling her daydreams. Sometimes she’d almost drift off, luxuriating in the memories.

Then start in embarrassment, glance around, hope no-one had seen here. Logically she knew that no one would realise what she’d been thinking about. But that didn’t stop her trepidation at the thought that, just somehow, someone might.

Or the way her heart would race, breath catching, the tips of her fingers trembling.

When she was alone it was so different. She didn’t have to worry then.

She could enjoy the arousal coursing through her, anticipation at what she was going to do having her breath quickening. A video was already playing, a girl, a brunette, having her arse fucked.

I cum from having my arse fucked. The voice was so certain.

Slowly Madison reached around behind herself with her left hand, the one holding the dildo. She could have been fast. Could have thrust it straight past her sphincter. But she didn’t, no matter how good she knew it would feel, instead teasing at her opening.

Sparks of pleasure leapt through her, as the tip, slippery with lube, played at her opening, the gentle pressure hinting at so much more.

Her eyes fixed on the video, Madison probed and prodded at her opening, running the tip across her starfish, almost allowing it in. Her back arched, a moan escaping her lips as she increased the pressure. Then eased off, the need making her legs go weak. Then back again, her breath hitching.

“Oh God,” she exclaimed as the dildo slipped inside, the words sliding into a long, drawn out moan as she eased the intruder in and out of her arse. She’d moved to another video now, her eyelids fluttering in time with those of the girl on the screen. Her hand moved faster and faster, the dildo plunging in and out of her rear, delicious pleasure building, her crest so close.

Just a little more.

Madison thrust the dildo as deep as it could go, a guttural cry tearing from her throat as she came.

The aftershocks felt so good, but…

Did I? What?

Shame burnt through the brunette as she realised she hadn’t even bothered touching her pussy. She’d cum just from the attention of the dildo.

That’s not… I don’t… Every other time over the last few days that she’d used the dildo she’d paid at least some attention to her pussy. Not this time. Shame, and just a touch of anxiety, warred with the memories of the pleasure.

I cum from having my arse fucked. It feels so good to have my arse fucked. It turns me on. It’s so good to cum from having my arse fucked.

The voice was so certain. Madison didn’t feel that certain. What she’d done was weird.

I cum from having my arse fucked. It feels so good to have my arse fucked. It turns me on. It’s so good to cum from having my arse fucked.

That was true. The orgasm had been amazing, her body still warm from the aftershocks.

I cum from having my arse fucked. It feels so good to have my arse fucked. It turns me on. It’s so good to cum from having my arse fucked.

It was only the truth. A moan escaped Madison’s lips, the tip of the dildo playing at her sphincter again. She hadn’t even thought about it. She could do it again. She wasn’t sure that she should, but it was so tempting.

The dildo was inside her now, Madison’s hips bucking. Deliberately, she pulled her hand away from the mouse. Gave her pussy a few strokes. Nothing much.

She made sure that she did that every other time she came in front of her computer that night.

Even if she wasn’t sure that she needed it.

Even if sometimes her hand almost fought her.

“You cum just from having your arse fucked.”

“I cum just from having my arse fucked.”

Ethan didn’t need to have the girl tell him that. He knew it was true. He’d seen her do it, the webcams dotting her room had given him a perfect view. But having her admit it was useful.

And fun.

He’d paid particular attention last night. All his private nightly cam shows were worth watching. But last night he’d wanted to see how Madison responded to his new instructions. He’d watched as she’d stripped off. It was no erotic show, he could work on that, but for now it was just a simple disrobing. Even so, watching her glorious body revealed always made for riveting viewing.

She’d hesitated for a few moments after she’d readied the dildo. He’d been worried that she might deviate from his instructions. He shouldn’t have been concerned. Madison had done just what she’d been told, at least the first time. She hadn’t touched her breasts or her pussy. And she’d cum so hard.

Her brain had made the connection between anal stimulation and pleasure. Deep in her mind, he’d changed her. Even if he stopped now, she’d never be the same as she was when he’d started. Anal penetration would now be something she always enjoy More than enjoy. She’d want it. Need it. For a moment he pictured it, neural pathways slowly realigning, new ones opening up. Stimulus producing conditioned responses, dopamine flooding her brain at the sensation of having her arse filled, orgasm after orgasm changing the structure of her brain, the form of her sexuality.

“I cum just from having my arse fucked.”

Yes you do, Ethan grinned evilly. “Say it again.”

“I cum just from having my arse fucked.”

“Let’s try something else. You love having your arse fucked. You love to cum from having your arse fucked.”

“I love having my arse fucked. I love to cum from having my arse fucked.”

She believed it now, the conditioning producing the desired effect.

“I love having my arse fucked. I love to cum from having my arse fucked.”

Ethan let the girl repeat that a few times. Probably more than he really needed. He was picturing himself delivering that fucking, his cock rigid in his jeans. Despite how good it felt he needed to move her on.

“What do you want fucking your pussy?”

“A, a cock.”

He had to be careful here. Too much concentration on normal sexual activity might undermine what he was doing.

“That’s right. A cock. A cock is for fucking. It feels good to get fucked by a cock. Tell me that.

“It feels good to get fucked by a cock.”

Madison displayed no hesitation at that. Ethan wasn’t surprised. He’d never bothered checking, but he assumed that before he’d started that she was heterosexual, with normal desires for that sexuality. She’d like getting fucked by a cock.

He hadn’t said how though.

“Tell me that again.”

“It feels good to get fucked by a cock.”

He had the girl repeat that a few times, before returning to the reinforcement he’d been using earlier.

“I love having my arse fucked. I love to cum from having my arse fucked.”

“Very good Madison,” he grinned. “Now I want you to say both those things. Both of the things I’ve been having you repeat.

“It feels good to get fucked by a cock. I love having, my, my,” the girl stumbled, the ghost of confusion on her pretty features.

“So deep, so empty. You’ve said those words before. You know they are true. Now say them together, understanding their truth.”

The girl blinked, hesitated, Ethan wondering if the command would take effect. Then the words spilt from her pretty lips. “It feels good to get fucked by a cock. I love having my arse fucked. I love to cum from having my arse fucked.”

“That’s right,” Ethan crooned soothingly. “So deep. Thoughts drifting away, as you sink deeper into your trance. Listening to my voice. It’s so easy, just stating the truth when you’re so deep in trance. Just the truth. You’ve already admitted it, so it will be so easy to say it again. Say it now, Madison.”

“It feels good to get fucked by a cock,” the girl replied dutifully “I love having my arse fucked. I love to cum from having my arse fucked.”

“Very good Madison. It’s so good to state the truth.” Nothing the girl would disagree with there. “So let’s try something else. Is it better to be fucked by a cock or a dildo?”

“A-a cock.”

He hadn’t been one hundred percent sure about the answer he was going to get there. Either way he’d needed to know. Fortunately for him, Madison had provided the answer he wanted. “So good. So deep. Now repeat. It’s better to be fucked by a cock than a dildo. I want to be fucked by a cock.”

There wasn’t the slightest pause in Madison’s reply “It’s better to be fucked by a cock than a dildo. I want to be fucked by a cock.”

Just as well you’re in trance. If the girl had been awake she’d probably very quickly have realised where Ethan was leading her. “Now repeat it.”

“It’s better to be fucked by a cock than a dildo. I want to be fucked by a cock.”

He let that sink in with a few repetitions. “Okay, now remember something else you told me. What do you feel about having your arse fucked?”

The answer came reassuringly quickly, the idea so embedded now in Madison’s mind. “I love having my arse fucked. I love to cum from having my arse fucked.”

“Right. Good girl. That was with a dildo. What’s better for fucking than a dildo?”

Something that might have been a frown hovered about the brunette’s features. “A-a cock?”

“That’s right,” Ethan replied reassuringly. “Remember what you were telling me about cocks and dildos. Say that again.”

“It’s better to be fucked by a cock than a dildo. I want to be fucked by a cock.”

“You’re doing so well Madison. You want to be fucked in the arse. It’s better to be fucked by a cock than a dildo A cock in your arse will feel even better than the dildo. Tell me that. Believe it.”

“A, a.” Madison frowned. He could almost see thoughts forming behind her eyes. “No. I? Cock?”

“Stop,” Ethan ordered hurriedly. “Drifting down. Deeper and deeper. No thoughts. Just my voice.” He waited until the girl had visibly calmed. “A cock in your arse will feel even better than the dildo. Say that.”

“A, a c-cock in my arse, my arse, will feel e-even better than the dildo.”

At least she’d managed to say the words this time. But he could see the tension in the girl, her forehead creasing with worry, hands forming into fists. “Drifting down. No thoughts. Just my words.”

Slowly he brought her deeper, watched as the tension drifted from her body.

“Now say it again.”

“A c-cock in my arse will feel, feel, even better than the dildo.”

Better. But not quite.

“Remember how good the dildo felt last night. As you came.” He didn’t have to ask her how good it had felt, He’d seen the look on her face, the cameras in her room relaying every orgasm to him, Madison having unwittingly bought and installed even more, showing him every detail. “Remember it. Feel it.”

Madison’s lips pouted, her eyes half closed, Ethan seizing his chance. “Feel the pleasure. The bliss. Remember those orgasms.

The girl moaned, her head tossing slowly.

“That dildo isn’t the same as a cock. You want to know. It will be so good. Feel how good it felt. Remember it. Now say it. I want know what it feels like to have a cock in my arse.”

“I w-want to know what it feels like to have a cock in my arse.”

There wasn’t much emotion there. Certainly no desire. But there was also less reluctance. “Again. Feel it.”

Ethan lost count before Madison said it without hesitation.

“I want to know what it feels like to have a cock in my arse.”

“Let’s add to that. It will feel so good to have a cock in your arse. Put those together.”

“I want to know what it feels like to have a cock in my arse. It will feel so good.”

He let Madison repeat that a few times, the ideas seeping into her mind.

“I want to know what it feels like to have a cock in my arse. It will feel so good.”

She was almost where he wanted her. “Good, good. Now, what happens when you get fucked in the arse?”

“I cum.”

“That’s right Madison. So good. So deep. You cum so hard from being fucked in the arse. So what will happen when a you get fucked in the arse by a cock?”

“I’ll cum.”

A sly grin spread across Ethan’s face. He’d just need to let her think on all that. A few more sessions and she should be desperate to have her arse reamed. He could just imagine her, face down on the table, legs spread, quivering in anticipation as she waited for him to impale her. He wasn’t sure how long it would be; the girl’s feelings of embarrassment would need to be overcome. He’d waited this long. He could wait some more.

That evening, Madison stared at the dildo she held in her hand. Something about it seemed… wanting, no matter how much pleasure she knew it would bring her. An idea crept into her head. Something that would make her feel even better.

No! I don’t want to.

I want to know.

But, I shouldn’t.

I want to know.

I shouldn’t.

I want know what it feels like to have a cock in my arse. It will feel so good.

It would. Madison was sure of that. Pleasure would radiate from her arse. Fucking herself with the dildo was amazing. And it was her voice. Her thoughts. So they had to be right.

It’s better to be fucked by a cock than a dildo. I want to be fucked by a cock. There was so much certainty to the thought. No doubts. No fears.

I want know what it feels like to have a cock in my arse.

That was a different matter. Thinking about it was one thing, little jolts of arousal hitting the brunette’s body at the images. But then she thought about how to make it happen. If she was to get a cock in her arse, that cock would have to be attached to someone. Who would know what was happening.

Madison’s toes curled in embarrassment, her stomach tumbling in nausea. She couldn’t…

I want to know what it feels like to have a cock in my arse. It will feel so good.

She did. She wanted it so bad. She could picture it. She’d be just like those women on the screen, her face contorting in bliss, her back arching as a cock impaled her.

I want to know what it feels like to have a cock in my arse. It will feel so good.

She didn’t know if she could, shame pushing the arousal away.

Damn it! This wasn’t fair. Madison didn’t want to be some shrinking violet. It wasn’t as if it was all that unusual. Lots of people did it. Didn’t they? And guys didn’t care where they stuck their dicks in girls, as long as they got it in. God, guys would probably fall over themselves to do it.

That didn’t stop Madison’s shoulders hunching, embarrassment flooding over her at the idea of asking for it.

I want to know what it feels like to have a cock in my arse. It will feel so good.

She couldn’t escape the thought. She did want to know. Even if she knew it would feel good. She wanted to know how good.

I can do this. She could go out. Find a guy. It wouldn’t be that hard. Flirt a bit. She’d never had trouble attracting guys. Just the reverse. Hooking up wouldn’t be hard. And then she’d just have to let him know that…

Madison wasn’t sure exactly how she’d do that, her toes curling again. But was sure that she could.

She’d just have to summon up her courage.

With a gesture of finality, she put the dildo down and headed for her wardrobe. Her skimpy dresses didn’t get that many outings. But tonight would be one.

(To be continued)