It was an odd thing, being both a person and possession.

Miranda's bipolar disorder was relatively well managed- she was in therapy and took her regular medication- but that didn't prevent her from having regular depressive episodes. They weren't as bad as they had been in the past- she was pretty sure that she would never actually kill herself now, for example- but they still occured like clockwork every year, usually in the winter. It was in these periods- periods where she couldn't do things for herself- that she became Thadra's possession.

Things that were hard to do for herself during these times became easier to do as something owned by Thadra. Taking a shower. Getting up and going to bed at the right time. Making sure she ran once a day. Making sure she ate. 

It wasn't down to her what she wanted to do. It was Thadra's decision and Thadra's directives. All Miranda needed to decide to do was decide to obey. Then she didn't get a choice. She didn't have to struggle to find the value in herself during these times. She could just find value in being Thadra's- following her orders and doing things to please her.

Her therapist had been nervous about this arrangement, especially because there was hypnosis involved. She requested Miranda check in with her more more frequently the first several times- and Miranda was more than happy to comply (even before Thadra had also ordered it). She wanted to make sure she was doing things that were healthy for her. But- just as she had predicted, this frame of mind was very useful for getting through her darker months. After all,  she didn't have to worry about being an awful person if she wasn't a person. She was Thadra's object that was functioning within her rules or not.  Miranda's therapist, eventually satisfied, had gradually gone back to their normal schedule during Miranda's darker weeks (with the caveat that she was always available for more frequent sessions if Miranda needed them).

Miranda considered the many ways people gave themselves up to a higher cause. People who joined the military. People who joined the ministry. People who had kids. On the one hand, it seemed really silly to compare her kinky sex games to those levels of sacrifice. On the other hand, though, she felt she finally understood something about the steadiness and purpose those commitments could bring.

Her commitment wasn't as long as some of those. It usually only lasted for weeks at a time- just when she was in her darkest places. But- it made her feel settled in a way. Steady. And right now, when it was hard being a person, keeping herself going as a possession of Thadra's would have to be enough.