Neurotic Love
I Know I’m A Man… But Sometimes I’m Not
by deathrosepetals
It’s important in the real world for people to embrace both masculinity and femininity. Fear of either is for the weak.
“But… I’m not ready.” Indigo lazily stated. “Please, Master. I like… being in the warm water. I don’t want to go anywhere. May I fill the tub more?”
“Oh, we aren’t going anywhere, slave. We’re snowed in, remember? Enjoy yourself. I’m just so eager to see you dressed up. You can just wear the clothes around the room to try it on. We’re completely snowed in.” Sem said softly while turning on the faucet. “I am right here to serve you. What would you like next? I can massage your scalp, massage your shoulders, I can whisper stories in your ear… or all of the above.”
The hallucinations Indigo were experiencing were pure and happy. Butterflies filled the room and flowers bloomed all over the walls. Sémillon had wings and a halo over his head. When he spoke, music notes gently floated out from his mouth. His voice sounded like multiple tones converging in a musical unison.
“Y-yes, Master. Please do want you want with me.”
Sem place his palms on each cheek, his fingers pushed through Indigo’s ebon curls. The touch influenced by the high made Indigo drool from the wondrous skin contact. The two looked at each other upside down peering into reflecting eyes.
“Close your eyes.” Sem commanded. Indigo helplessly complied. In his complicity he eagerly awaited for more commands. “I’m going to whisper a story to you until you doze off. Then when the water gets cold again it’s time to pamper you. After I dry you off and brush your hair we’ll get back into bed, okay? When we wake up you will try your dress on.” Indigo nodded in delight.
“You’re such a good girl.”
These words invoked a warm fuzziness causing his brain to melt. Spiraling ever downward into a well of pleasure and submission, Indigo sensed dominion over his own soul slipping into the trusted hands of his owner. While he drifted off further into hallucinogenic induced euphoria, Sem stepped out of the bathroom momentarily to retrieve a book of fairytales.
“In days of yore, when men freely aimed for simple exploration, friendship, and the delights of learning; when women went to war as equals and over just cause; in an age uninfluenced by modernity, and passions were undimmed in the face of opinions; there existed a haven; Aether. It was a place brimming with what we would consider anomalies or aspects that defied nature, but for them it was common. Intelligent dragons danced a song harmonious with humans, massive beasts in the abyssal regions of the oceans never knew the light of day, and mystical monsters roamed the mountains. One day in the central structure of the kingdom, the Palace of Good Faith, was approach by a beautiful man with long flowing hair. He was not from Aether clearly. The stranger posed no risk to the king and in fact had a plea.
‘Most honorable majesty’, he spoke in a resolute yet light voice. While kneeling he extended his hand outwards towards King Fikmennt.
‘Who are you, so humble, though clearly desperate to approach royalty without a marked audience?’ The king inquired.
’My name is Shaman, Knight from Notirus. I beseech you in dire straits representing my domain by moot. The Inner Circle of Notirus decreed I be sent before you to request aid, personal aid, directly from you.’
Well, this is fun, exponentially intriguing. Fikmennt thought to himself.
‘So Shaman, your respective Inner Circle sent you, yet you make no mention of the King, I take it he has no knowledge of your presence here? So what does that suggest? You can be forthwith.’
’Thank you, Master. In brief, he’s spontaneously gone mad. He once… ‘ “
Sem trailed off, Indigo was heavily drifting into dreams as the water’s temperature declined. He got up from his cushioned chair and walked around to drain the tub. As the water lowered Indigo in a rapidly fading lucid state asked:
”Is— is it bed time now?”
“Yes, my love, let me dry you off and then we’ll rest more.”
As the lukewarm water drained exposing his body to the rigid air he felt soft, warm hands touch his shoulders. Sem kissed his smooth face from behind and whispered in his ear asking him if he was ready to stand. The faint nod in agreement indicated he was not ready to stand, but in coordination he was propped up, dried off, and dress in a night gown.
(4 hours pass)
The blizzard outside had subsided. The weather strangely altered from arctic death spiral to relaxed sunny day. The two were still not going anywhere with how high the snow piled up, and the day would not last for the snow to even melt an inch.
Indigo had fantastical visions imagining the story where Sem left off in his fairytale. But rather than Knight Notirus and his plight, the details changed to a helpless woman begging the royal couple. He was a queen and Sem was the King. They lived together in a castle nestled in a valley betwixt looming mountains. Flowers paraded as far as the eye could see.
One woman showed up, rushing at breakneck pace through the Great Hall, tripping before the feet of the Royal Heads. She attempted to issue a plea concerning a problem yet struggled greatly to convey the matter. She visibly bore a red flushed face, stuttered her words, and tears ran more potent than waterfalls. She stayed in her prostrate position looking upwards to them.
“Take your time, let’s start slow.” Queen Indigo expressed calmly.
“M-my, my name is Zen.” She replied, still broken up, but slowly able to enunciate words properly.
”You are quite distraught, milady. Do you need quarters for resting? You can stay in the royal guest chambers. You may even join us for dinner, please you must relax now.” The Queen said.
“Th-thank you, Your M-Majesty. I think— I think I desperately need that. I fear without your grace I will perish from sadness.”
“We will simply not allow that to happen, Lady Zen.” King Sem chimed in. “Please, arise, you need not bow. We do not expect our subjects to bow in this Court.”
As she stood up King Sem motioned to one of the Knights at his side indicating to escort her to the Chambers. Then he delegated with his wife to assess the situation.
”My, what could have gone wrong to cause such a young woman to suffer?” Queen Indigo contemplated. “Sadness such as that is… not uncommon but always powerful, infectious and clearly derived from immense pain.”
“Yes,” King Sem added. “ But your approach was the best course of action. Make her realize how important she is; make her feel welcome. I always admire that about you. You, will no doubt contribute to the solution more than myself.”
Their hands interlocked while their elbows sat firmly on the arm rests.
“Hmm, I was in a similar position once, Sem. But you knew all the right words, did all the right, things, you silver-tongued devil, you. I know you like to get to the bottom of things at an accelerated rate whenever one of our subjects arrives, but only because you reserve all your sweetness for me. Don’t, for the sake of them, my sweet master. Give them a taste of our love, our life, our happiness. Your help is great of course as an effective problem-solver. Yet, don’t be afraid to demonstrate affection. Even it took myself a long time before you finally confessed the reasoning behind your brevity. I love you and know you, but they do not. They never will, but please share with the world so they may—“
The King cut her off and began kissing her intently. He placed both hands on her face and they could not stop their mutual affection. Quickly the two stood up and rushed to their quarters.
Garments were removed faster than the wind at the bedside. They happily rolled into bed and pulled over the covers. During their intimacy a knock at their door caused a surprise.
“Guards, what is it?” Sem asked.
“Your Highness, sincerest apologies, but it’s the girl. She insisted … she couldn’t sleep.” Guard Zadkiel replied.
The King and Queen positioned themselves with etiquette and in a manner suitable for guests.
“Well, send her in I suppose.” Queen Indigo remarked.
Lines between dreams and reality become indiscernible when it seems as if a premonition has formed.