Why The Hell They Do It

by Archibael

Tags: #cw:noncon #dom:female #f/f #silly #sub:female

Not quite the answer you expected, but probably the answer you fantasized about

This one is not my best work, but it wasn't meant to be. It was a one-off, a joke to the many lesbian and bisexual ladies who frequented the MCForum in those early days.  Their long-running gag was that the True Lesbian Conspiracy was really running things, and that some day they would reveal their presence and power.

There's much that could be said to criticize the story-- did I mention it's not my best work?-- but one comment that's always puzzled me is the reaction to the statements from Filipinos in regards to whether there are lesbians there.  The story is entirely fiction, Stan and Vince are clearly doofuses (doofi?) but "Raffy" is based on a real guy I knew in 2004 and the "there are no lesbians in the Philippines" was a direct quote in a discussion with him and his girlfriend at the time... whether you think the character believes it, or whether the actual guy believed it or was being ironic or he meant there were no "out" lesbians there, I didn't make that part up.  I, in fact, thought it was a hilarious comment for them to make at the time, and made the story reflect that.

Dedicated to the members of the True Lesbian Conspiracy. You know who you are.

"They always go in pairs," Vincent commented, watching their asses as they left. "Or groups."

"I know, it's frickin' hilarious. Why the hell do they do it?" Stan dipped a french fry into the chili and it quickly disappeared thereafter.

"To talk about us, dude. Where we can't hear 'em."

"Stupid. Why don't they just tell us what they're thinking. If it's dumb, we'll tell 'em so, and if it's cool, we'll be cool."

Vince shrugged. "Chicks, dude. They're all alike."

Raffy was silent, but that wasn't entirely out of character; he was pretty shy, even back in Manila. Here, he had an adequate, but not expert, grasp of the language, and the Americans were prone to using idioms and slang which he imperfectly understood.

But wasn't that why he'd come here? The brashness of Americans was world-renowned, and Raffy felt he needed a bit of that for himself, to help him break out of the quiet mold he was in. They were a bit crazy, too, which was why his initial choice as an exchange student had been Australia, but he'd gotten used to the oddness quickly enough. He decided he needed to participate in the conversation.

"In the Philippines, women usually go to the restrooms alone. This is definitely not... um... universal."

"Seriously, dude? That's bizarre." Vince was not prejudiced against other cultures, really, he was just a bit clueless. "Well, not bizarre, you know, but, like, different."

"Yes, it is different."

"Well, Rosalinda went with them this time, so I guess she's becoming more American or something, huh?"

Raffy laughed musically. Rosalinda had always wanted to be more American. She was fascinated with American culture, and television, and... well, too fascinated, perhaps. But there was no harm there, he thought. The Philippines were going their own way, despite being part of the American empire in one way or another for almost a century. He liked Rosalinda a great deal, and planned on travelling to see her when they both returned home next year. "Yes, she's definitely becoming more American in some ways."

* * *

Rosalinda followed Trina and Anne into the restroom. She didn't really have to answer the call of nature, but both girls had invited her to come with them, and she wanted to do whatever it was they were doing. She suspected they wanted to talk about the boys, privately. Which was fine by her; she wanted to ask them about Vince...

Anne headed into one of the stalls, while Trina walked up to the mirror and began to fix her hair. Rosalinda giggled inwardly, not knowing why Trina bothered-- her pretty red hair always looked elegant despite the occasional misplaced curl. "So how do you like the States so far, Roz?"

"I love everything." Except perhaps the diminutive "Roz". "I have always wanted to come here and see it. It's a lot of fun."

"Yeah, you seem like a real party girl."

Rosalinda was not sure if this was sincere or sarcasm. It was so hard to tell with these girls. To be safe, she just smiled and began to toy with her own glossy blank locks.

Trina became a bit more guarded, now. "Um, Roz?"


"Do they have TLC where you come from? The Philippines, I mean."


"TLC. 'Together, with Love, we will Conquer.' Ring any bells?"

Rosalinda had never heard of such a thing and shook her head.

"Really?" Now Trina was smiling broadly. "Hey, Anne," she yelled. They don't have the TLC over in the Philippines."

"Get out!" came Anne's voice in disbelief over the aluminum barrier of the stall.


"Well, I think it's time to change that, don't you?" She flushed the toilet, and came out of the stall, headed for the sink to wash her hands.

"I don't know. What if she doesn't want to?" Trina was smirking.

Anne rolled her eyes. "Does that even matter?"

Rosalinda was stumped, and wary. Were they making fun of her, like Rizzo had made fun of Sandy, the fish out of water, in Grease? She stayed quiet, but looked quizically at the two girls as they tried to decide... whatever it was they were trying to decide... Now they were both looking her up and down in what seemed to Rosalinda a... predatory way. It made her uneasy.

"I'm thinking yes."

"Oh, yeah. Definitely a keeper."

Now Rosalinda had to speak. "I'm sorry, but I don't understand what you both are talking about?"

"You will, Roz, hon. Anne, shall we explain?"

Anne was headed for the lightswitch. "Yep. Just a sec."

Then the lights went off, and everything became very clear to Rosalind.

* * *

"So what do you think of Rosalind, Raffy?"

"Dude, what do you think he thinks of her. She's a hottie, dude."

"Vincent, man, I'm asking him. We already know you've got wood for her, okay?"

Vince was furtive. "I don't have wood for her, dude. She's got nice tits is all. Right, Raffy?"

Raffy didn't quite know where to begin. This was pretty damned offensive, if you asked him, but he'd heard worse from these guys. Somehow it was different when they were talking about another Filipino, though. Especially Rosalinda... He decided not to take offense, but it was a close thing. He didn't think they actually meant any harm. "She is very 'hot', I think. Nice teeth, nice figure. And lovely hair."

"Looks like you've got competition, Vince."

"Shut up, dude. Raffy can have her if he wants her. I'm... sorta seeing Trina right now, anyway."

Stan was incredulous. "Nuh uh."

Vince looked a little proud. "Hell, yeah, dude. We were going at it in her basement last week."

"Sheeit! So, spill, man: didja get any?"

He leaned back in his seat. "Dude, I got my share."

"Blow job?"

"I'm not sayin', dude. It's none of your business."

"That's a 'no'."

"Hey, fuck you, dude! I don't see Anne under the table servicing your ugly ass right now. And you've been with her for like six weeks."

"Anne'll do anything I want, Vince." He looked very smug. "Anything."

* * *

The emergency lights flickered swiftly as Rosalinda felt perhaps a bit woozy. Anne held her arm and guided her over to the padded bench near the exit door.

"I... don't know why I feel so... I'm sorry..." she sighed.

"It's all right, Roz," came Trina's voice, a bit singsongy. "We're here to help you."

"Yes," Anne replied. "We'll help you. You can trust us."

"Trust you."

"Just sit back and relax. Feel content. Look at the flickering lights."

"Relax. Lights."

"You're feeling a little bit tired now, aren't you Roz?"

"Yes, tired."

"But still very attentive and alert, now Roz. The lights are flickering slower now, aren't they?"

They were, a little. "Yes." She heard a rustling noise where Anne was sitting, next to her. Her eyes were half-lidded, and Trina spoke again.

"Now, look at me, darling. Notice how the flickering is reflected in my eyes, making them light up and darken in a lovely rhythm."

It was a lovely rhythm, and Trina's blue-green eyes were as deep as the sea.

"Sink in, dear, look into my brightly shining eyes and sink in."

Rosalinda was swirling inward, now, listening to Trina speak and drowning in her eyes.

"You're caught in my eyes, now, but don't be frightened. Anne is there with you, aren't you, Anne?"

"Of course, dear heart," Anne whispered in her ear, the breath of the words moving her hair.

"Anne will hold you as you go deeper, and more trusting, relaxed as the flicker slows more."

"Anne, hold me..."

"Hush, dear. I'm with you."

"Roz, take a deep breath, and when you let it out, feel your cares and wants blow out with it."

Rosalinda expelled the air, wind of its passage containing all her fears and worries and aspirations.

"Now, since those are gone, we've got to fill you with something, don't we, sweetheart?"

"Fill me...?"

"Just listen to my words, and they will fill you with new purpose. And new concerns. And new desires."

"New... desires..."

The flickering was slow, now, maybe a couple of times per second, but each time it lit Trina's eyes for what felt like eternity.

* * *

"No thanks. We'll have some more soda, though."

"Dude, that waitress was looking at you, Raffy."

"She was?" Well, of course she had been, but she was asking him whether he wanted more food.

"He's right, man. She gave you the ol' up-and-down. You should ask her out."

"No way, she's a skank, dude. Don't listen to him."

"She has a very fine ass, thankyouvery much. See!" Stan gestured with his nose toward their waitress, who was displaying a very attractive posterior as she bent to pour coffee for a neighboring table.

"Shyeah! Nice legs, too. But she's a little lean up-top, and her face ain't no prize. Dude."

Raffy thought the waitress was rather nice-looking, actually. These other guys were far too judgmental. "I think she's fine."

"Then ask her out, Raff-meister. I bet if you asked for her number she'd give it to you."

"Hell, yeah, dude. Hell, yeah. Give her some of that Filipino stuff you got, you know what'm sayin'?"

Unfortunately, "the Raff-meister" knew exactly what Vincent was alluding to." It was times like these he thought he should have gone to Nippon instead.

* * *

Rosalinda leaned back and sighed. Trina grinned. Her initiation was nearly complete. She remembered her own induction, years before... goddess, it was glorious!

"Okay, Roz, dearest, tell me what you want most from life, now that all the rest of that silliness is gone."

"I want... I want..."

"Yes, go on, dear..."

"I want... what Anne is doing to me right now..."

"Yes, that's right, you desire that most of all. But use your words, sweetness, use the new words."

"I... I want her to eat out my pussy. I want her to lick my... my..." Climax tore the words from her. "LICK MY CUNT!"

Anne rode Rosalinda's groin with her mouth, but did not relent, adding a finger as the Filipino girl came to orgasm. The extra pressure inside her, combined with Anne's continued attentions, drove her over the edge again.

"And...?" Trina added expectantly.

"I need the taste... the taste of girl. On my tongue." She was panting now, recovering. Anne slowed down to a gentler stroking instead of the intensity of the previous moments.

"Very good, Roz. Maybe next time." Both Trina and Rosalinda shivered in disappointment, and anticipation. "But for now, dear, what is the next step?"

"I will return to the restroom whenever a girl asks. I will return for further programming."


"My pussy will own me during my programming."

"As it should be. Now, the rules?"

"Men are to subjugated to women using the only language men understand. Sex. We will own their minds by owning their cocks."

"Yes..." She gestured to Anne to quicken her efforts again.

"We will take no joy in men, though we take them within us. Our joy is to serve toward the Goal." She was losing it again, starting to grind herself into Anne's tongue. "We of the True Lesbian conspiracy. Together, with Love, we will Conquer."

"Does your pussy own you, yet?"

"Rrrnneh... I... I think so..."

"Don't think, Roz. Know. Does your pussy own you?" Anne was watching for her signal, and she gave it.

The intensity peaked. "I-- uhhhhhhhhh. I am owned. Owned by my pussy. I obey it, because it tells me the truth. The truth that Cunt is All."

Anne strummed with her tongue, and Rosalinda's mind was folded in an almost audible snap.

Trina grinned.

* * *

"Fina-fucking-ly! Sheesh, what the hell were you doing in there?"

Anne rolled her eyes and looked at him. "We were having dyke sex."

"Dude, I wish!" Vince high fived Stan, and then Raffy, who returned the gesture half-heartedly.

"Yeah, save some for me." Stan laughed. "Bet they don't have lesbos in the Philippines, do they Raffy?"

Rosalinda sat down next to Raffy. "Not really," she said for him.

He glanced at her oddly; she had encircled his calf with her own, almost possessively, and she grinned right back. Something about the grin made Raffy think of Trina.

"Maybe there will be, someday, though," she giggled to the group. "Someday."

Feedback is my ambrosia and nectar.  If you like my writing and want to see more of it, please comment and let me know!


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