“So what did you tell them?”

“I said I’ve got a bad cold, and I’m feeling too rough to go out at the moment,” Program:Selena replied, closing the door of her childhood bedroom and trotting across to her bed, one eye on her phone screen. “Which isn’t fully a lie, to be fair. I do have a cold, just not as bad as I made out!”

On the other end of their video call, User:Andrew raised an eyebrow. “How sneaky! I’m sure there’s some kind of Azimov law against robots lying...”

She stuck her tongue out at him. “We can too! When it’s part of maintaining our cover identity, anyway...”

Lying down on her bed with her back against the headboard, she glanced around the room for a moment. Much of it had been preserved in the same state as it had been in her teenage years, her parents leaving it practically untouched (save for a couple of boxes of random junk from around the house, which had been tucked into an empty corner of the room). Her shelves still held a few old books and comics, though she had taken the majority with her to New York, along with all the various miniature Doctor Who and Star Wars figurines that had stood proudly on display. The wall was still decorated with posters of different sci-fi characters, all with a robotic or cybernetic theme, like the Cybermen or that silver female protocol droid from the start of The Phantom Menace. All together, they rather painted a picture. It was something of a miracle none of her family had ever figured out her secret (as far as she knew).

She’d had a very happy childhood, but she was glad to have moved on - not least because she could live as she chose, without fear of repercussions should her parents and sister discover the truth about her. She should have been back in her habitation two days ago, reunited with her User, but snowstorms had grounded flights across the northeast. Her corner of Michigan hadn’t been too badly hit - her town had been covered in a layer of snow, but it was more ‘winter wonderland’ than ‘Class Three kill storm’ - so her family could still drive to their local Chinese restaurant for lunch without much trouble. NYC, on the other hand, was in a more serious state. It currently looked like she wouldn’t be home until after New Year.

That sucked. She wanted to be S3 again. She wanted to serve her User again. The separation filled her mechanical heart with simulated sadness. She could tell he missed her too - over the last week they’d rarely made it through a single waking hour without messaging each other, even if only to send a meme.

“How can a robot even have a cold, anyway?” he teased, without malice. She knew by now that he wasn’t trying to undermine the scenario she had built for herself - he was simply curious to see how she would explain such things.

“My nasal cavities can get clogged with dust and dirt, just like the hard drive of a computer.”

“Sexy.”

She laughed. “Makes my CPU run slower, my head overheat a little... Looks like a cold to the uninformed. Don’t worry though, my health systems are taking care of it. I’ll be alright in a couple days.”

“I’m glad to hear it,” he grinned. “Actually, that reminds me of another question that’s been bugging me...”

“Ooh, someone’s in the mood to test me, huh?” she smirked. “Didn’t you hear me saying my CPU’s not at its best...?”

“Hey, if you’re not feeling up to it...”

“No no, I’m up to it!” she said hurriedly, giggling. “I lied to my family so I could spend time with you! Go ahead, by all means ask your question, sir.” She winked.

Andrew sniggered. “Well, I was just wondering - what happens when you get older? How do you explain... ageing?”

Selena nearly laughed again. That was what he wanted to know? That was one of the first rationalisations she’d come up with, all those years ago when she’d started her journey of hypnotic robotisation. She had that explanation ready and prepared!

“The lab that created me will build older versions of me - models that’ve been aged up,” she told him matter-of-factly. “Then it’s just a matter of removing my CPU and installing it in my new body each time. Their technicians can do that easily enough.”

“You really have thought through every detail of this,” he said with an impressed smile. “You’re so damn smart...”

She smiled and nodded gratefully at him. “Thank you, User:Andrew. Although to be fair, I have spent a long time, and a lot of time, thinking about it!” She arched an enticing eyebrow at the camera. “Now, I believe you wanted your robot slut to show itself off to you...?”

He chuckled, licking his lips with anticipation. “Oh, my, yes. It’s so freezing cold here, I need my sexbot to warm me up...”

“Yes, User:Andrew,” she grinned, winking at him again.

Jumping to her feet, she crossed to a shelf on the opposite wall - the one directly in her sightline when she sat back against her headboard. She propped her phone up on the shelf, giving Andrew a good view overlooking her bed. Then she made her way back, deliberately swaying her hips to show off her ass. She heard her boyfriend give an appreciative murmur down the phone line. Hooking her thumbs under the waistband of her black jeans, she inched them down, still undulating as if dancing to imaginary music...

“Pause,” Andrew called out, just as Selena tugged her pants past her butt cheeks. She instantly froze in place, the flow of her digital thoughts suspended. She stood there in the middle of her room, blank and static, her CPU idling, having half-pantsed herself and exposed her ass to her watching User, her head half-turned to glance back over her shoulder in his direction, a sultry smile fixed on her face.

The seconds ticked by, the automaton remaining inert and immobile. There was no patience required, no exertion of emotions or strength of will to keep herself fixed in place. She simply wasn’t capable of moving, of even thinking of moving. It was as if she had been fully deactivated - she was no longer Selena nor S3, just a lump of mindless, motionless metal.

Until at last Andrew said, “Resume,” and Selena’s mind blinked back into action as if no time had passed, continuing with the last directive she had been following - to pull down her pants while still swaying and showing off her butt to her boyfriend. She was aware of what had just happened - of the time she’d just spent as a statue on display for him - but she couldn’t quite react to it yet, her computerised brain delayed by the freeze. She was only able to blush and titter after her jeans had dropped to the floor, a mere few seconds later.

“I shoulda known you’d get round to using that one,” she called over her shoulder, as she tugged down her pale blue panties. Andrew let her do so uninterrupted this time. He’d installed the ‘pause’ command just before she’d left but hadn’t actually used it, leaving her shivering with anticipation.

“Well, what can I say? I wanted to look at your butt for a little longer, I like it...”

“Really? I hadn’t noticed,” she teased, slowly swivelling to face towards him. Smiling seductively up at the shelf, she took hold of the bottom of her striped white-and-navy sweater and tugged it up over her chest, which was bare underneath.

“Pause.”

She stopped, her sweater half-off, wrapped around her head, her arms tangled inside it, pointing up into the air. Her shallow breaths gently shifted the woolly fabric in front of her face as she stared vacantly at it. She was still taking in data from around her (although her visual and auditory sensors were both fairly obstructed right now), but she wasn’t capable of processing any of the information. She heard Andrew make a sound in the distance, but even if it hadn’t been muffled by the sweater, she couldn’t have understood it.

She did, however, register him saying more clearly, “Resume,” a few seconds later.

Finishing removing her top, she shot him a mutinous grin. “I’m starting to think you might just like pausing me in embarrassing positions.”

“Who, me?” he blurted in a high-pitched tone of mock indignance.

Snickering, the naked android settled back onto her bed, reaching for each of the far corners of the mattress with her feet. She glanced up at her phone again, more for Andrew’s benefit than her own. Although she knew he had a clear view of her from his current vantage point, she couldn’t see him. But she could hear his heavy breathing even from this distance, as he admired the sight of her spread-eagled on the duvet, her pussy and boobs bared, showing herself off just for him. She smiled coquettishly, running her fingers over the folds of flesh between her legs, gently groping one of her tits with the other hand.

Despite her ambivalence towards her own sexuality, she’d recently started to quite enjoy masturbating - but only in front of Andrew. Only when it was to amuse and arouse him. She was a service robot, and this was another act of service... but better than most, because she was bringing her User pleasure. She could hear his slightly staticky sighs and moans echoing around the room as she rubbed her slit and tweaked her nipples...

“Pause.”

She held still, index and middle fingers in a downwards V-shape with her labia nestled between them. Her other hand had been tenderly tugging on her nipples, rolling them between finger and thumb, stimulating them until they grew longer and harder. Now it was caught in the act of pulling her right nipple. She kept the pose perfectly, obediently, mindlessly, grinning up at her phone all the while.

Andrew ‘pressed play’ eventually, allowing his very own private porn to resume. But he couldn’t resist the urge to interrupt his robot girlfriend a couple more times as she continued his free camshow, next immobilising her just as she was cleaning her cunt’s synthetic secretions off her hand using her lips and tongue. She was suspended in time with her digits deep in her mouth, her eyes only open a crack, her other hand clinging to the tit it had been massaging.

The last time he paused her, she had begun to thrust her fingers inside herself. Following the preferences her User had set, she snuck her other hand beneath her to slide a finger up her butt. She carefully tipped herself over, lying down on her left side, with her right leg stretched up in the air above her - so that she could better access her anus, and Andrew could see her fucking herself more clearly. It was in this position that he froze her, one index finger knuckle-deep in her asshole while the other had partially pulled out of her pussy, as they had been see-sawing back and forth inside her. Her eyes were tight shut and her mouth wide open - she had been in the midst of a cacophonous moan of ecstasy, only partially simulated. She was so turned on, so aware of Andrew ravenously watching her masturbate, on the brink of orgasm, but unable to proceed any further until he permitted her to move...

She heard her boyfriend’s own moans, high-pitched and frequent, slow to a stop, his voice lowering to its usual tone as he gasped for breath. “Resume,” he panted moments later, “and stop masturbating.”

“Yes, User:Andrew,” Selena whimpered, her fingers halting their relentless onslaught, though she made no attempt to remove them from inside herself. Lowering her leg, she opened her eyes and smiled sleepily up in the direction of her phone. “I take it you enjoyed that?”

“So much,” he sighed. “But anyway, I just came, so... that’s that, isn’t it?” His tone was mischievous. “You don’t need to carry on, do you?”

“Of course not, User:Andrew,” she smirked. “This unit pleasures itself only for your entertainment. It does not need to continue now that you have achieved orgasm.”

“Fuck,” he sighed. “I love when you talk like S3 but you’re still you...”

“Duly noted! Now, does this unit have your permission to remove its fingers and clean itself up?”

“In a minute, my slutbot,” he purred. “I just want to look at you for a little longer, enjoy the sight of you lying there like that...”

Program:Selena giggled, enjoying the way her laughter seemed to make her digits vibrate inside her holes. “Confirmed!”

Yeah, she couldn’t wait to be home and be S3 again, an emotionless android at her User’s beck and call. But, she reflected as she lay naked on her bed in her childhood home, this wasn’t a bad way to compensate for the distance between her and Andrew. And it would certainly whet both their appetites for her eventual return...

***

“I still can’t believe there are this many other people into this,” Andrew muttered, his eyes fixed on his laptop screen.

“I know, right? There are so many more than you’d think.” Selena strolled across the living room towards him, a mug of coffee in each hand. “It’s fun to think that they’re, like, people in all corners of society. Like, teachers and lawyers, and actors and waiters...”

“Just living their lives, presenting these vanilla, ‘wholesome’ versions of themselves to the world” - he actually made the quotation marks sign with his fingers as he said ‘wholesome’ - “but behind closed doors, they’re hypno-kinky freaks. I mean ‘freaks’ as a compliment!” he chuckled, blushing slightly.

“It’s taken as one,” she smirked.

The fembot set the drinks down on the coffee table in front of him, looming over him with a smile on her face. She made a move to sit down next to him, but before she could, he casually uttered, “Assume the position.”

S3 bypassed Selena long enough to reply, “Confirmed,” but her simulated mind reasserted itself even as she fluidly moved to do as he had commanded, circling around the side of the couch. Bending into a right angle, she draped herself over the armrest, lying on her front across the couch cushion with her forehead resting on her folded arms, her face turned to the side.

A small sigh escaped her lips as she settled into the familiar position. She seemed to have spent a lot of time lately with her head down and her ass up. She couldn’t say she minded.

“You’re getting a lotta mileage outta this one, aren’t ya?” she sniggered.

“Well, yeah,” he chuckled, fondly caressing her head with his left hand, while the right continued to scroll through the webpage he was looking at. “You good with that?”

“Of course,” she replied in a flirtatious tone. “I am your butt-bot, after all!” She giggled at how hard it was to say that without it sounding like ‘bot-bot’, or ‘butt-butt’.

“Easy for you to say,” he teased, evidently noticing the same thing. “I mean, just look at this stuff,” he gasped, abruptly returning his attention to the screen. “This girl - OK, so she said something somewhere about being an office manager, but here she - it - is talking about being blindfolded and used as a fleshlight for all its friends! And the guys that run this server - a script writer and two actresses... I mean, we might’ve seen these women on TV. And they spend their whole time at home hypnotised out of their damn minds by him, being his sex slaves...”

Andrew’s voice had a tone of astonishment, but Selena could also hear him starting to breathe heavily - and the hand on her head was starting to grasp her hair a little tighter, like a stress toy, winding the silky strands between his fingers. She grinned - you didn’t have to be the most advanced robot in the world to pick up on those signs of arousal. Although to be honest, it was hard to read the stuff in that Discord server and not get madly horny.

“Is it such a surprise?” she asked. “I mean, you’ve seen how well I switch between my ‘public’ and ‘private’ selves...”

“Y’know, maybe it shouldn’t surprise me, but it actually really does,” he laughed. “I mean, I’m still getting over how incredible you are, and how your brain works - but I never really imagined there were other people like you, I kinda thought you were one of a kind. Not that you’re not one of a kind,” he added hurriedly. “I just mean...”

“It’s OK, I know what you mean,” she reassured him with a giggle. “And I know, it’s pretty amazing that these people are out there. I still remember how mindblown I was, when I found my way into the hypnokink community. All these incredible people, using hypnosis to change their own minds and find their way to being their ideal selves... or, y’know, just to have sexy fun, which is also very valid! It’s just been really nice being among them, and getting to talk to them as S3 and as Selena.”

“I thought you said you hadn’t told anyone else about S3,” he remarked nonchalantly.

She grimaced apologetically, even though he couldn’t see her face. “Yeah, I didn’t really count the folks I know through Discord, because they only know me as, like, ‘the robot girl’. Sorry, I should’ve told you...”

“No, it’s OK,” he insisted, giving her hair another tender stroke. “Telling me all the robot stuff was enough for me to come to terms with. Adding ‘online hypnokink friends’ on top of that might’ve overloaded me!”

She smiled. “Maybe!”

“Have you met any of these guys IRL?”

“A few, yeah. I’ve been to some conventions - there’s one in San Francisco I’ve gone to a few times. I met Hailee and Sabrina there, I’ve gotten to know them and their people...”

“Which ones are they?”

“Uh - ‘blind obedience’ and ‘This Barbie’s a horny lil slut’.”

“Oh, right,” he chuckled. “And, hold up - hypnokink conventions? That’s a real thing? Because, uh, awesome.”

“They really are,” she said earnestly. “It’s, like, almost an entire week where I can be S3 99% of the time, and walk around in my nanosuit in this big public space, and there’s not a single raised eyebrow. It’s... it’s hard to describe how fulfilling that is for me. Plus, I get to meet all these wonderful gorgeous people, and get to know them and see how they use hypnosis, and be involved in their sexcapades!”

“Oh, you’re definitely gonna have to tell me more about those,” he sniggered. “For real though, I love that for you, babe. I wanna see that for myself - you existing in that kind of environment, getting to just be who you really are around other people...”

“Come to San Fran with me,” she blurted excitedly. “Come to this year’s con, you’ll see it all there. And I’ll introduce you to my friends, too!”

“Oh, I’d love that!”

She beamed, already picturing herself as S3 marching mechanically through the convention hall once more, but hand in hand with her User this time. She couldn’t wait.

Speaking of waiting... “Um, User:Andrew? You ever gonna take this unit up its tight little asshole?” She gave a sultry snigger, waggling her butt in the air for emphasis.

“Oh hey, I’d almost forgotten,” he exclaimed, as if in surprise. She couldn’t tell if he was being sincere or not.

Setting his laptop down on the table (after moving the coffee to one side), he hopped to his feet and ambled along the couch, passing unhurriedly through Selena’s sightline. There was no rush, after all. He knew his android slut would wait for him.

For once, Selena was dressed in human clothes rather than her nanosuit - a white button-up shirt, black pleated miniskirt, and black tights. It was an unusually warm day for the season, and they were planning to take advantage of the weather and go for a walk in Central Park in a little while. Andrew flipped the skirt up over her back, and then pulled her tights and panties halfway down, leaving her legs still clad in translucent black nylon while her butt was now bare. She shivered at the feeling of cool air caressing her crack - and then let out a whimper as it was eased open, her User’s hands gripping her ass cheeks nice and firmly as he spread them apart.

Then, he abruptly let go. “OK, I’m gonna go to my room and look at this Discord server for a little longer,” he said matter-of-factly, picking up his laptop and his coffee. “Then I’m gonna take a shower and get dressed to go out.” She heard his footsteps moving away towards his bedroom.

“Wha - are you just gonna leave me here?” she called out. “You know I can’t move from here ’til you cum inside me!”

“Well, you just look so pretty like that,” he replied, a mocking undertone to his voice. “It’s a nice view. I feel like your ass should be the first part of you I see when I walk into a room...”

Selena thought for a moment that her CPU might have short-circuited a little. “I - that - um -” she stammered, blushing hard.

“Hey, I’ll be back soon,” he said as if to reassure her, although his tone was still mischievous. “And maybe I will fuck you, if there’s time. But not right now. I’ve gotta familiarise myself with this wonderful, wild world you’ve introduced me to!”

“I’ll keep calling out and distracting you, then,” she snarked. “Try paying attention to what you’re reading while I’m going ‘blah blah blah’ from the next roo-”

“S3, mute Program:Selena’s voice,” he interrupted.

“Confirmed.”

“There,” he said triumphantly. “Easily fixed. I’ll be back soon, my little sexbot. Try not to overheat while you’re there in that position...” And with a malicious little chuckle, he left the room.

Selena buried her bright red face in her crossed arms. Andrew’s transformation from nervy, wary new boyfriend to commanding, playful, slightly sadistic User seemed to be complete. Now she was stuck there with her bare ass in the air, unable to move much or utter a single syllable, waiting on his whims.

It was possible she’d never been more turned on.

***

“Confirmed. File deleted.”

Selena raised her eyebrows. Wait, what? She and Andrew had been having a normal conversation, and then all of a sudden she found herself - or rather, itself - making that announcement. Blushing, she shot him a smirk. “Uh oh. Trickery!”

He clapped a hand to his chest in mock horror. “Whatever do you mean?”

“Yooou...” she tittered, unable to meet his eye.

It was clear that he’d had S3 erase some memories - obviously not very much, as they were both still sitting in the same positions on the couch. She glanced at the wall clock, noticing the time was 1.25 PM. Last she’d checked it had been 1.22, so whatever mischief he’d been up to hadn’t taken long at all...

He gestured at her with his hand. “Please, carry on - you were saying?”

The last thing she remembered before S3’s toneless proclamation, they’d been discussing their hopes for the new series of Doctor Who. She narrowed her eyes at him. “I feel like this is a trap, but OK... So, I mean, just judging by the last two specials, Ncuti Gatwa’s an awesome Doctor. He’s, like, he’s so good...”

“Oh, I know, right? It already feels like he’s been the Doctor for years,” Andrew remarked.

“Maybe because he was cast almost two years ago,” she chuckled. “And Ruby’s promising, and super cute, and they work well together on screen. I thought the Christmas special was kinda light for, like, the big relaunch of the show - but then it’s Christmas, you can’t expect it to be too intense...”

“We’ve had three Christmas regenerations,” he pointed out. “Those weren’t so light...”

She shrugged. “Yeah, but do they really count as Christmas episodes? Didn’t feel like they - feel like they - feel like they - feel like they - feel like they -”

She didn’t know what was happening. She couldn’t stop herself from repeating the same three words, over and over again. She couldn’t change her facial expression - she just continued gazing earnestly at Andrew, her hands hovering in mid-air in front of her nanosuit-clad chest in a conversational gesture as she helplessly repeated.

She was stuck in a loop, and although she was aware of it, she couldn’t do a thing to stop it. She couldn’t even think, really, the feedback blanking out her computerised brain. Every time the loop restarted, she felt a little jolt, a surge through her systems that made her head jerk slightly and her eyelids blink.

“Oh no, what’s this?” Andrew said, his concern blatantly insincere. He was struggling to stifle a smirk as he leaned closer to examine his glitching girlfriend. “Looks like some kind of malfunction... Selena? S3? You still in there?”

“Feel like they - feel like they - feel like they -”

He waved a hand before her eyes, her stare unwavering. He snapped his fingers a few times. Nothing seemed to work. She just kept repeating. She was dimly aware of her cunt producing some lubricant. Strange that she could be aroused by being helplessly trapped in a mental loop... Must be part of the malfunction. Yeah, must be.

“Well, when all else fails,” Andrew said to himself, loudly enough to be heard over Selena’s continued repetition, as he reached out and around her head, “turn it off, and turn it back on again...”

“Feel like they - feel like they - feel li-a-uh -”

As his finger pressed the button on the nape of her neck, her voice stuttered into silence. Her eyes fell shut, her head nodded onto her chest, and her arms dropped into her lap. Her fragmented mind vanished in a whirl of data, leaving only empty darkness in its place.

With no awareness of its surroundings, S3 couldn’t have known how long it was deactivated for. However, it felt like mere moments before User:Andrew was pressing its on button in its belly, powering it back up again. “Unit S3-L3N4 online. Reactivating personality.”

Selena took a deep breath and smiled a little dazedly at her boyfriend, who was gently running his palm over her polyester-clad back. “You OK?”

“Yeah,” she said a little hesitantly, running a quick systems diagnostic to make sure she actually was OK. Everything seemed in order (although everything had seemed in order before her unexpected mental loop). “Yeah. That was weird.”

“Bad weird?”

“No, no, it didn’t feel bad, exactly,” she mused, chewing her lip slightly. “Just really strange, and a little scary...” She shivered. “I’ve never felt that powerless before - not even when you left me bent over the couch!”

“Nothing like that’s ever happened to you before, then?”

“Nope. It was like a system crash. I couldn’t control myself, I couldn’t do anything at all - I couldn’t even reboot myself. If you hadn’t been there to switch me off and on again, I dunno what I would’ve done...”

He smiled sheepishly. “Well, if I hadn’t been here, you wouldn’t have been in that situation in the first place.”

It took a second for his words to sink in. She turned in her seat to gape at him. “Wait - what did you...”

“I may have given you a bit of a... virus,” he almost whispered. Now he was the one who couldn’t make eye contact, grinning down at his own hand resting on his thigh.

“You what?!” she squeaked.

“A very benign one!” he clarified quickly, before adding with a low chuckle, “Mostly! It doesn’t actually crash your system, it just, uh, simulates it. It’s like any of your other commands - it’ll stop and put you back to normal if you have a new priority to attend to, or if there’s an emergency... And it only works if I activate it, and I can disable it again.”

She stared at him with an astonished frown, partly outraged that he would introduce a virus into her systems, partly impressed that he’d got away with it, and partly (OK, mostly) still aroused by the effect it’d had on her. She ran her virus checker, and was even more bewildered by the results. “But - I can’t... I can’t find it, I can’t detect it at all...”

“Oh, it’s very clever,” he smirked, finally raising his eyes to meet her ocular lenses. “It’s designed to hide from detection, to evade any antivirus software.”

She groaned, planting a hand against the side of her head. “So now it’s in there for good, I can’t get rid of it... I’m assuming this is what you did during those few minutes I lost?”

“Yup! I explained the concept to you, you OK’d it, and then I uploaded it into you and wiped your memory.”

She fumed a little, but had to concede that must be true - neither she nor S3 would’ve allowed him to get away with anything they didn’t genuinely want. Which means she must have been fine with the idea of having her boyfriend deliberately contaminate her CPU. Maybe she was even excited by the prospect. That was unexpected. She never would’ve thought she’d be OK with the notion of being interfered with on such a fundamental level... but then, it did heighten the feeling of being under User:Andrew’s control. Of being his robot, his device, to use - and to misuse - as he saw fit...

That was hot.

And at any rate, as usual, he was doing it in such a way that she wouldn’t actually be harmed. The virus only simulated a systems failure - it wasn’t actually making her malfunction. Andrew would never cause her any lasting damage - she trusted him.

She grinned apprehensively. “So, was that a one-time thing, or am I gonna glitch again sometime in the - time in the - time in the -”

Well, that’s a ‘yes’, she managed to think amidst the oncoming mindstorm. Once more, she was stuck repeating the same three syllables over and over. Only this time, she noticed, her body wasn’t entirely stuck in the position it had been in. Her leg had started to gently bounce up and down on the ball of its foot, out of time with her looped utterances. As the knee-jerking became more pronounced, her arms began to twitch and jolt at her sides.

“Time in the - time in th- time in th- time in - time in -” She noticed her looped phrase becoming shorter, leaving slightly longer pauses between each repetition. Her voice quavered and rasped, her oral speakers struggling to vocalise the words as her head, too, began to move uncontrollably, swinging jerkily from her left to face forwards, to the right, then forwards again. “Time in - time i- time i-” Her eyes started to drift upwards, rolling up into her head.

“Oh dear,” she heard her User tease her. “Now this looks like a full breakdown. My poor robot’s really not at optimum, is it?”

“Time... time... ti- ti- ti- t- t-” Finally her speech degraded completely, her speakers only emitting barely-audible croaks and clicks as she sat spasming on the couch, her limbs and head flailing directionlessly. An outside observer would probably have thought she was having some kind of fit, unless they noticed her nanosuit and realised that the convulsions were symptoms of an android breaking down.

She tried to resist it, to get herself back under control. She tried to move anything under her own power - an arm, a hand, a finger, her eyes... Nothing worked. Program:Selena was not responding. She could’ve sworn she felt herself cum a little, just from how completely helpless she was. And from knowing it was her User, her boyfriend who adored her, that had done this to her, purely for his own amusement.

“Well, don’t worry your little metal head, Selena,” he chortled over her faint stuttering. “It’s not a one-time thing, but it is a two-time thing. You’ll be fully restored again when I reboot you, all systems totally back to normal.” He reached for the back of her neck once again, threading his arm past her juddering limbs. “That is, until next time...!”

***

Selena snorted with laughter. “Wh-what? Why would you ask me that?!”

Her boyfriend shrugged, gazing nonchalantly back across the kitchen table at her. “I dunno, it seemed like a reasonable enough question...”

“No! No, I’m not!”

Andrew arched an eyebrow. “Really?”

She stared at him as if he had lost his mind. “Really. I’m not a robot!”

“Are you sure about that?”

“Uh, yeah, pretty sure! I don’t know why you’d think -”

“Well, I mean, given what you’re wearing...”

“What about what I’m wearing?” she protested. “It’s just what I wear at home, my comfy clothes... There’s nothing unusual about it,” she insisted, gesturing vaguely down at her nanosuit.

“You think so?” he said mildly, and then added, “S3, disable Selena’s human speech.”

“Confirmed. This unit just cannot understand how you could think it is a robot. It is not a robot! It is obviously a human female!”

Andrew took a sip of his drink, still staring at it dubiously. “Were you ever a robot before?”

“How would that work?” Selena shook its head incredulously. “Negative. This unit has not, nor has it ever been, a robot!”

“Huh. Well, OK, then, my mistake. Forget I even said anything.”

“Oh, negative, this unit is not letting you off the hook that easily,” it snickered.

He grinned ruefully. “Yeah, I bet I’ll never hear the end of this!”

“Affirmative! What kind of girlfriend would this unit be if it did not mercilessly ridicule you for thinking it might be a robot?”

“Not the kind of girlfriend I’d want, that’s for sure,” he admitted, still wearing a self-deprecating smile.

“Affirmative,” it chuckled again, spooning pasta into its mouth.

“S3, disable Selena’s emotions,” Andrew said casually as it swallowed the mouthful.

“Confirmed.” Its mystified mirth at its boyfriend’s behaviour faded in an instant, its face relaxing into placid blankness.

He gave it a knowing look as he chewed carbonara, one of his eyebrows arched. “Done making fun of me, huh?”

“Affirmative,” Selena replied tonelessly.

“And you’re still sure you’re not a robot?”

“Affirmative.”

“Hmm, alright then.” He sat back in his seat, crossing his cutlery on his plate. “Clear these up, babe.”

“Confirmed.”

Rising to its feet, it dutifully and efficiently gathered up both its and Andrew’s plates, stacking them on top of each other, with their utensils lying on top. Then it turned and strode away to deposit them in the kitchen sink.

As it walked, Selena found itself reflecting on the conversation it had just had with its boyfriend. It was still unsure why he’d seemed so inclined to believe it could be some kind of android, but it didn’t find the notion as bewildering or hilarious as it had a few minutes ago. As far as it was concerned, he had asked a question about its nature, and it had simply answered. It would do so again, in the same way, if he asked again. It was aware it had promised to ‘mercilessly ridicule’ him, but now the topic didn’t seem worthy of ridicule.

Once it had placed the crockery in the sink and turned on the faucet, Andrew called across the room, “S3, restore Program:Selena’s human speech, emotions, and awareness.”

“Confirmed,” came the reply. Then, a few seconds later, more snorts of astonished laughter.

“Would you like to change your answer?” he called out.

Remaining facing away from him towards the sink, her only reply was to extend her arm behind her and wave her middle finger in his direction.

***

Coming to her senses surrounded by impenetrable darkness, Selena blinked in surprise. Then she realised she hadn’t - or, if she had, she hadn’t felt it. She couldn’t feel much of anything, including her eyelids.

She tried to raise her arms, but she couldn’t feel them either. It was as if she didn’t have them any longer. Nor did she find herself able to turn her head. She’d lost all sense of her body. She was sure she still had a body - she had a certain awareness of being something, a solid shape of some description - but whatever it was, it didn’t feel... usual. Familiar. Humanoid.

What the fuck was going on?! She couldn’t remember how she got in this position. Her last memory was of herself, as S3, marching into the kitchen to prepare breakfast for itself and Andrew. Then there was a gap, and now she was Selena, and she was something altogether different from what she was before. Something that seemed to lack limbs, or eyes, or a mouth...

“Hello?”

She instinctively tried to blink again, momentarily forgetting that she couldn’t. She’d tried speaking, just to see if she could, and heard her voice calling out. That implied three things. One: she still had her mouth, with functioning vocal speakers. Two: she also still had her ears, and her auditory sensors were just as functional. But, three: neither her mouth nor her ears were attached to whatever she was now. She could use them, it seemed, but she couldn’t feel them.

Concentrating, she tried to get more of a sense of her new form. It felt... small. Not tiny, but much smaller than her android body - about the size of her head, if she had to guess. But not as spherical-shaped - no, she felt more... blocky. Some kind of cuboid? A cinder block? No, it didn’t feel that heavy. It felt like there was a reasonable weight to it, but it also felt... hollow, somehow. There was a space inside her... Two spaces, in fact. And the top of the whatever-she-was felt like it was open, letting cool air inside her.

It was weird, feeling an empty space where her brain would be, if this thing was her head. Then again, it was also weird not being able to feel her face - not having a face. It wasn’t scary, though. It was utterly bizarre, but more than anything else she was having fun trying to figure out what the fuck had happened.

“Andrew?” she called out, again feeling a mental shiver as she spoke without being able to feel her mouth.

“I’m here, babe,” came his voice, from what sounded like not very far away. Not far away from her ears, anyway, wherever they were.

“What did you do to me?” she asked, her tone amused.

“What do you think?” he asked. “How do you feel?” He sounded genuinely interested. He was experimenting, she realised, testing the limits and capacities of her robotic mind and body. As was his right, as her User. He wanted to get as much data as possible, so he needed her perspective of whatever was happening.

“I feel kinda like a lump,” she said eventually. “Some... unformed thing, lying around somewhere.” As she said that, she realised she hadn’t even noticed that she was indeed lying on some kind of surface. It felt like... porcelain. Like a kitchen counter...? “I can’t feel my face, my body, anything - but I can feel this shape that I’ve become, and it’s, like, cuboid, and hollow, and open to the air...”

“Do you know what it is?” His voice had taken on slightly more of a teasing tone. He wanted her to at least try to figure this out for herself - which must mean it was, in fact, guessable - even if only to watch her struggle and fail.

She processed what little data she had about herself, and where she was. Something cuboid, with openings on her top that led into two empty spaces inside her. She was on what felt like a kitchen counter.

The kitchen - that had to be relevant. Last thing she remembered, S3 had been going to the kitchen. To prepare breakfast for them both. It was having a bowl of cereal, and he’d asked for peanut butter on t-

“Oh. My. God.” She was sure her dissociated mouth was agape with astonishment. “Did you - how did - you turned me into the fucking toaster?!”

“Well done!” She felt a series of light impacts on top of herself, felt a bizarre rattling sensation inside her, and realised that he was giving her congratulatory pats. “You figured it out, nicely done.”

“H-how? Why? What? How?!”

“Quite easily, actually - just through the Wi-Fi. I had S3 upload you into the toaster, but kept you still connected to your android body - so you can still communicate, even though you can’t feel your original self right now. I didn’t wanna put you in there and not find out what you think of it all!”

Selena didn’t quite know what she thought. She’d never been so totally divorced from her own body before, utterly unable to feel any part of herself - let alone to feel herself transformed into a toaster. On some level, she knew this was profoundly absurd. Toasters didn’t have Wi-Fi, and hers was no exception. But if she could be a robot pretending to be a human, why couldn’t a toaster be capable of housing her digital consciousness? The scenario just required the same suspension of disbelief that allowed her to live her life as S3-L3N4.

“Now, I’ve been so busy setting all this up - and groping your former body while it stands still in the middle of the kitchen - that I forgot to have my breakfast,” Andrew said matter-of-factly.

The next thing Selena knew, something soft, pliable and thick had thudded into one of the long thin slots in the top of her. Then she felt a fingertip pressing her lever - oh, right, she had a lever, protruding from her side, which she hadn’t registered before - and pushing it down. As it descended, she felt movement inside herself, metallic parts lowering and taking the slice of bread deeper inside her, until it was almost fully enclosed. There was a click, and everything settled into place.

And now she felt herself growing warm. It seemed pointless at this stage to still have the ability to speak, because she could not put into words how this felt. She was getting hot. She was pumping heat from within herself, and it was all directed at the doughy intruder that had been inserted inside her.

Selena heard herself laugh at the innuendo-laden way she was mentally describing the situation to herself. Nothing about this was remotely sexy. She was literally a fucking toaster, cooking a piece of fucking bread. She wasn’t getting any kind of pleasure from this. It didn’t feel erotic to have the bread inside her - it was just a lump of bread sitting on a metal grate inside a metal toaster. The heat wasn’t arousal, it was just heat, and a lot of it. All she was was heat. A small, contained, controlled inferno, on a counter, making toast.

It was just strange.

And what was stranger was... she was fucking loving it. She was getting a huge kick out of this - being transferred into a kitchen appliance, leaving her robotic body behind. Her mind was just computerised data, to be moved from one electronic vessel to another as her User chose. He’d turned her from one machine into another - a robot with a human program, to a thinking, talking toaster. It all just reinforced what she was - just a simulation, just code, just technology. And on top of the unexpected validation of her existence, she was just really enjoying the novelty of being a brave little toaster!

With a clunk, the toast shot upwards. As she began to gradually cool down, Selena felt a surge of satisfaction. Again, not sexual in any way, shape or form - just the warm pleasure that came with doing her job. She supposed that might be how she felt whenever he used her to make toast. That was what she existed for, and she expected she’d feel this pride each time she fulfilled her simple function. She wondered how long it’d be until he put her back in her robot body - and what he might get up to with it in the meantime, while she couldn’t feel it - and how many more pieces of toast he might have her make before he restored her to normal.

If she’d been operational for a thousand years, she never would’ve thought to do this. But then, that was one of the many wonderful things about having a User - particularly one as ingenious and deeply silly as Andrew. He could conceive of wacky scenarios such as these, and then they’d see them through together.

She looked forward to a lifetime’s worth of ridiculous ideas to try out with him.