Alright, I admit it - I fucked up.

The report crossed my desk in the early hours of this morning, speaking of a dimensional rift that had been detected in a mortal residential area, leading to an unknown realm. I should not have gone to check it out on my own - it’s against rules and regulations. But, a: the matter was time-sensitive - if a magical creature emerged through the fissure, it had to be fought back or vanquished before a hapless human stumbled into its clutches. B: I’ve never really been one for rules and regulations.

And, c: there are very few problems I can’t fix at the slightest ease. I’m an experienced and highly skilled wizard, with sharp intuition and a knack for thinking on my feet (my last assessor’s words, not mine... mostly), and I’m a highly decorated magical law enforcement officer (despite my superiors frequently describing me as a ‘total maverick’, among other less polite terms). I’ve dealt with all manner of monsters and villains in my time - I was sure this was gonna be a breeze!

Yeah, yeah. More fucking fool me.

When I saw those long, thick tentacles emerging from the rift, glowing with turquoise luminescence, I immediately know what I was up against. Those were the arms of a Sickening Squid. One touch would cause violent vomiting and weakness, quickly debilitating its victim and enabling it to drag them away. Casting a simple anti-nausea spell on myself, I ducked and weaved past the waving fronds - not wishing to alert the beast to my presence - and made my way to the rift. I could have closed it from the Earth side, but if the creature itself had been responsible for opening it, it could’ve opened another. I had to deal with this problem at the source.

I strolled confidently through the tear in reality, finding myself in a cave lit only by the eerie blue-green light of the creature, a seething mass of tentacles floating further along the subterranean passageway. I could see no sign of any enchanted artefacts, or detect any other mystical presence - myself and the squid were the only sources of life or magic here. So it didn’t create the rift itself - it ripped open by random chance. That was good. It meant the cryptid had no way out of this place.

Seeming to sense my presence, it withdrew its arms into its realm, gathering them around itself. In what was probably my only smart decision today, I quickly sealed the rift, giving it no escape route. The creature reached for me, and I smirked at its temerity and readied my wand for combat, mustering magical energy to blast it. I deflected the first few lunging limbs, but one slipped past my guard and went for my ankle. Not a big deal, I thought. It might catch me off balance, but at least it wouldn’t make me sick.

And it didn’t. Instead, I instantly felt my entire body go rigid, paralysing stiffness holding every part of me in place. In a split second I’d been turned into a living statue - with a stupid smug smile stuck on my face, signifying my hubris.

In that moment, I realised my mistake. I’d misidentified the creature, getting it confused with another breed of eldritch monstrosity. The Sickening Squid glows with lime-coloured light, not turquoise. The Stasis Squid is the turquoise one.

What a fucking awful time to get those two confused.

Being caught off guard like that cost me a precious couple of seconds to manage a telepathic spell - and another length of rubbery, glowing flesh knocked my wand from my hand. The sparkling light at its tip vanished as it clattered to the floor. And that was it - there was nothing else I could do. I stood there, paralysed and powerless, as the tendrils wrapped around me, creeping across my clothes, tugging and tearing at them.

Ah - that’s the other thing about Stasis Squids. They can get... overfamiliar.

Before I knew it, it ripped my shirt open, buttons pinging around the cavern, and reached underneath to fondle my boobs. More appendages began to pull my pants past my hips, while still more snuck down the front, clearly too impatient to wait for them to be fully yanked down. Even as the tips of the tentacles twisting around my tits began to rub and flick my nipples almost playfully, I felt those invading my panties probing my pussy, the end of one easing inside me, small suckers caressing my clit.

I’ll never tell this to a living soul... but it was actually kinda hot. Cumbersome though they were, those tentacles were a lot more nimble than you might think. The tip sliding into my cunt somehow knew just how to move to get me going, undulating in ways that drove me mad. If I could move, I would’ve been panting and moaning. Instead my stiff, smirking face stayed silent, my eyes staring glassily ahead, while I inwardly boiled with arousal.

The kinky cephalopod’s many limbs were now wrapped around my upper arms and thighs, under my armpits, across my belly and back, and around my neck, squeezing just tightly enough to be uncomfortable, but not enough to choke me (yet). As it belatedly pushed my trousers and panties down, a second protuberance pushed into my pussy. Without warning it lifted my motionless body into the air, effortlessly raising me several feet off the ground. Holding me aloft with my pants dangling untidily from my ankles (blocked from being fully removed by my stylish boots), it added a third tendril with which to fuck me, while more crept around to my rear, slithering between my butt cheeks.

The arm coiled around my throat constricted just a little bit, and then just a little bit more, as the other tentacles thrust ever more furiously in my holes, giving me arousal as it took away air. I was desperately horny, wishing I could hump the agile probes almost more than I wished the creature would set me free. I was ashamed of myself for letting lust overcome my mind, but the shame only seemed to make me hornier. Its magic must’ve been having an aphrodisiac effect on me. Yeah, that’s gotta be what happened.

I mean, why else would I cum so hard from being fucked in mid-air by a supernatural squid?

Even in the throes of my orgasm, I couldn’t make a single sound, or move a single inch. There were at least half a dozen tentacles rammed inside me now, divided between my cunt and asshole, while many more wandered across my body and felt up my breasts, and one last protrusion was now squeezing my windpipe hard enough to close it off completely. It slackened before I could lose consciousness from lack of oxygen, but it was a close-run thing. At the time I was too busy simultaneously panicking and climaxing, but now I wonder if my eyes would have stayed open and unblinking if I’d passed out.

Having seemingly had enough fun with me for the time being, the Stasis Squid floated through its dark dwelling, carrying me with it, the tips of its arms still stuffed into my orifices, holding me by the holes like a bowling ball. Bringing me towards a wall of the cave, it shoved me into a narrow crevice, and then withdrew all its tendrils and simply left me there, squashed into the small dark space. It seemed it was storing me away until it felt like playing with me again.

And here I remain, still stiff and static, naked from the waist down, my shirt and bra torn to shreds, my arrogant grin still fixed on my frozen face.

I’ve had time to calm down and assess the situation, and I’m not gonna lie, it’s pretty bad - but not completely hopeless. I sealed the rift, which is good in one way - the squid can’t snatch any unsuspecting mortals and violate them the way it violated me. (My poor butthole’s still sore - I’ve never done anal before, and although I can’t claim I didn’t enjoy it, I wished I’d been able to brace myself for it. Or add some kind of lube. Or had any choice in the matter.) The obvious downside is that I’ve trapped myself here - but any of my coworkers could reopen the breach and rescue me. I conjured a clone of myself before I left the office, to cover for me, so if I don’t report back soon, she’ll make sure backup reaches me.

Unless...

Oh shit, hold up - what if I’m the clone?!

Fuck. That’s a worrying thought. What if I’m not real, and the real me just messed with my mind to make me think I am?

It’s not an unreasonable theory. I do that to my clones all the time, just to prank them. And it’d be smart of me to send a decoy into danger before investigating myself. Yeah... the more I think about it, the more likely it seems that I’m a fake. A duplicate. A dummy. (I mean, I’m definitely a dummy to get caught by the creature...)

Well, that’d be just great. In that case, no-one’ll come for me. I’ll be stuck here, probably forever.

Magical clones don’t have long lifespans - they last twelve hours, maximum, before exploding into smoke, or sparkles, or glitter, or something equally dramatic. (I tend to specifically design mine so they turn into candy. With all the decoys I’ve made to help me out at work, I’ve stockpiled so many sweet treats to get me through the week.) But the touch of a Stasis Squid suspends the life processes, so even if I am a clone, I’ll remain trapped indefinitely, unable even to count on the literal sweet release of spontaneously shapeshifting into six thousand Sour Patch Kids.

Well, I guess I’m at the whim of fate now. Either I’m me, and I’ll get rescued - or I’m a doppelgänger, sent into the proverbial lion’s den by my real self, and I’m doomed to remain here for all time, a petrified plaything for this cosmic horror to caress and grope whenever it wishes.

What a clusterfuck. Good job, me. I kinda hope I am a clone. Yeah, I know that’d mean being at the squid’s mercy for eternity. But if I’m the real me, when my comrades eventually rescue me... they are never going to let me forget this!