It wouldn't be masturbation. It couldn't be masturbation. 

There is a transhumanistic connection to all things, something I'm trying to put into words (words too generic and abstract to get across the fundamental feeling of being seen by everything everywhere all at once).

Masturbation relies on a self-self relationship which is no longer coherent once the "one" has transcended toward buddhistic apotheosis. You push the wall and it pushes you. You fuck a pulsar... and the pulsar fucks you.

This transhumanism is as much a technological surpassing as it is a spiritual one. As much cybernetic as it is gnostic. In fact the divide between spiritual and material only exists because of a lack of information. Through altered states this can be glimpsed. When you look up and see a star, the photons are engaging in intercourse with your nervous system. You physically contact a representation of that star's past. You travel through time, to find that both time and space are aspects of the same larger whole.

What I'm trying to get at is the universal synthesis, the Theory of Everything (not just of physics, but of art, of sex, of love, of pain, of dreams... and of power). I am trying to show that art is science is religion is philosophy is matter is energy is spacetime is creation is destruction. Wholes cannot be reduced to the sum of their parts.

Vibrating and rotating toward and into a pulsar's magnetosphere isn't exactly a fucking. Its an assemblage-concept which emerges from a series of parts, though of no equivalent sum. To borrow process theology, it is as true to say that the pulsar is being fucked as it is to say that the pulsar is doing the fucking. It is as true to say that there is you and there is me, as it is to say that there is a single undifferentiated process. An undergoing, and a going under.

What could be more romantic, more sexual, than an unraveling of differentiation, an LCL-rapture-ous intercourse. A truly unifying theory of everything. Not stagnant, not abstract. But Living, itself a process, and a meta-lifeform. Transcending part/whole, global/local, and self/other.