The Four Housemates of the Apocalypse
A Burglary Attempt With Zero Complications
by Etherealust
The world was a cruel and unfair place. Some people were born lucky and never had to work hard to get anywhere in life, while others needed to slave away for whatever scraps they could find. It was a rigged system, and Steph knew that better than anyone. She also knew that in the face of such injustice, it was only fair to forcefully take what really should have been hers all along.
That was what she constantly repeated to herself as she got ready for her plan. The chemistry exam had been unfair. Even after hiring all the best tutors she could find, she’d still somehow bombed the end result. She’d even cut back on her social life to spend three whole hours a week studying. At that point, what more could she have possibly done? What could anyone have done?
She could have been born lucky. Some of the other students were just naturally gifted, and they were able to ace the course without putting in the effort, because they happened to be effortlessly talented at it. Steph did her best not to hold a grudge, but it was hard to take the high road. The system wasn’t fair, and she was a victim of it. So the most fair thing would be to take from somebody else.
And of all the naturally talented prodigies in her class, none pissed her off more than April, the mousy girl who always managed to get good grades. On top of being smart without having to try, April had a cushy relaxing job as a barista, and she’d started dating the class weirdo as well. But worst of all was the fact that she’d lucked out with her living arrangement. She lived in a house with a couple other girls. Not a cramped apartment, a whole-ass house, like what the sororities got.
Steph wasn’t jealous of her. But she was frustrated at how easy April’s life was, and that unlike herself, she never had to face any real adversity. But she had a plan to even things out. The chemistry assignment worth a third of their grade was due in less than a week, and this time, Steph wasn’t going to leave her grade up to chance. She’d managed to track down April’s house. She was prepared with a crowbar and a balaclava. Tonight she would stage a robbery, make a big show of stealing any valuables in the house, and then find a way to make off with her assignment to submit as her own. Either by taking her actual physical papers or downloading it to her USB stick and then deleting the files.
It was the perfect plan.
April’s house was an especially nice place. It was in one of the richer neighbourhoods, so it was fairly isolated from the other houses. Not quite a mansion, but all things considered, not that far off either. And from a previous stakeout she knew exactly where April’s room was - first floor, right next to the main entryway. Steph had also learned that despite the rich appearance, there weren’t any signs of a security system. No cameras or alarms would make her job that much easier.
It was time to go. April did one last check - long sleeved shirt, ski mask to cover her face, crowbar for getting inside, an empty backpack to make out with the goods, and a knife in case things got messy. Not that she had any intention of using it, but it was a great tool to scare people off in case of an emergency.
Although she was prepared to go in loud, Steph was hoping to go in silently. She put the blunt end of the crowbar underneath the window and started prying it open. It took a bit of effort, but after a few tries, the window swung right open. No broken glass, no alarm blaring, nothing. It was the best scenario Steph could’ve asked for. She hoisted herself up and snuck inside, heart pounding with excitement. This was it, her ticket to a passing grade. And maybe she could even snag a few valuables along the way.
April’s room was a surprisingly messy one. Steph had been expecting the typical “type A personality” layout of keeping everything neat and tidy, but it was generally unkempt and in disarray. Piles of clothing were strewn about in one corner, with a couple different books awkwardly stacked on top of each other with one of them open on her desk. Steph blushed as she noticed a rather large dildo standing up on the bedside table as well. But above all else, her luck was continuing, as the room was completely empty. Maybe if she was lucky she could get out without even confronting her target.
Not wanting to squander her opportunity, Steph got to work snooping around. She couldn’t find any jewellery or cash, but she reminded herself that that was secondary to what she really wanted. She wanted notes. And thankfully, a rather thick stack of handwritten papers were strewn across the desk.
Steph began flipping through the pages, and a smile grew across her face. This was it. The chemistry paper, worth a massive portion of their final grade, hers for the taking. It wasn’t fully put together or organised, but it was undeniably the right project. Steph didn’t mind that she’d have to properly arrange everything before submitting it. She was willing to put in the hard work if necessary, after all.
To her dismay, however, her luck ran out before she could stuff the papers in her bag. Steph heard the door begin to open from the other side. She froze in place, caught off guard in surprise, as it swung open to reveal April on the other side.
April was just as stunned as she was, to say the least. They stared at each other, mouth agape, Steph’s mind panicking at what was happening. She was busted. Things could get ugly, and she needed to get out before April got mad at her.
“No no no, this can’t be happening. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck…” April was stuttering her words, her body visibly trembling. “You can’t be here. This can’t happen, you really can’t be here.” And with that, Steph remembered what she was doing. She still had the cover of her mask. April didn’t know who she was or what she was after, she was terrified of a burglar. It didn’t matter that Steph could feel her own insides turning to jelly, she just needed to project her own confidence and wait for an opening.
“Your money and all your valuables. You need to put them in the bag. Now!” Steph kept her voice low, but she did her best to sound threatening.
Given April’s rapid breaths, it appeared to be working. “It’s okay, it’s okay, we can fix this. She was muttering to herself under her breath, hardly even acknowledging Steph. “They haven’t found her yet. Or they don’t know she’s an intruder. So we’re still good.”
As convenient as her absentmindedness was, it was starting to frustrate Steph. She snapped her fingers. “Hey, are you listening? I said, your money and your valuables. Nobody needs to get hurt.”
That seemed to perk April up. “Right. Um, to be honest, I don’t really have much that you’ll want. But please, you have to trust me here. You need to leave. Like you need to leave right now.” There was a sense of urgency in her voice, as if she was on the verge of panic. “Listen to me, you can’t be in this house, okay?”
Steph felt a wave of anger surge up inside of her. She’d come this far, and she wasn’t planning on leaving without getting what she wanted. She still held all the cards. But before she could say anything, April jerked her head to the side. “Shit. She’s coming. You need to go hide in the closet ASAP.”
“What? Maybe you don’t understand what’s happening here, but I’m-”
“You need to hide NOW!” April hissed at her in a hushed tone before practically shoving her into the closet. As she did, her eyes lingered on the backpack for a moment. “Wait, Steph? Is that you?” April shook her head. “Whatever, it doesn’t matter. Just shut up and let me handle it until she’s gone, okay?”
Steph didn’t even know how to respond with everything that was happening. Her cover was blown, and somebody else was coming, which should’ve been her worst case scenario. Except April was talking like she was trying to help her. Regardless, Steph was effectively stunned into silence as the closet door shut in front of her. And not a moment too soon, as she heard the sounds of someone else entering the room.
“April? Did you bring over a guest without telling anyone? You know that Iris needs a heads up beforehand.” There was a new voice, one that Steph didn’t recognise. Presumably it was one of April’s housemates.
“Melonie! Hi! Nope, just me, as usual. Doing some… regular me things, like studying.” Steph had to stop herself from facepalming. Of course she was forced to rely on a bumbling idiot. Not that April gave any sign she knew how weird she sounded. “So, by the way, do you want to go watch a movie? Out in the living room and away from here?”
“Hmm…” There was a tense silence as the newcomer deliberated. “Okay, sure. I’ll even let you pick.” Steph felt herself exhale, letting out the air she hadn’t realised she’d been holding in. Although she sucked it right back in after hearing what Melonie said next. “First though, do you mind if I grab something from your closet? I think I left something there a while back.”
“NO!” April was quick to shout her response. “That’s, um, I’ll get it for you later. We can just go now, alright?”
Much to Steph’s dismay, Melonie wasn’t done with her interrogation. “You know, if I didn’t know you better, I’d say you were keeping secrets. Because it sounds to me like you’re hiding something from me. I thought you were better than that. It’s really hurtful to think that you would try and lie to me like that.” She let out a deep sigh. “I know I can be hard to deal with at times, but I really do think of you as a friend. But I guess you don’t see me the same way. If you don’t think I’m worth telling whatever you’re hiding, then I guess I understand.”
Now Steph was actually starting to feel guilty. April was risking her own friendship for her sake, and she had no reason to. Not guilty enough to come clean, but a little guilty nonetheless. “That’s not…” April sounded like she was caught between her own words. “That’s not it. Melonie, you know I really do care about you, right?”
“Of course I know that. By the way, you are aware that I’m totally fucking with you, right? Obviously I know that you’re hiding someone in there.”
“MELONIE YOU BITCH!” Although April was replying with anger, Steph felt a chill run down her spine. How did Melonie know she was in there? Had she heard them beforehand? Whatever the case was, there was no more use in hiding. She pulled the balaclava off her face and got ready to face whoever was waiting for her outside. And not a moment too soon, because the closet door slid right open, exposing her to a pair of girls both staring at her. For a second Steph thought she saw something furry darting out of sight behind Melonie, even though there had been no sign of a pet.
Not that it mattered, she had much bigger problems to deal with. Such as trying to sell Melonie on this lie her target had constructed for some reason she still didn’t understand. “Um, hi. I’m ah… Steph.” She mentally kicked herself for using her real name, but it was too late to back out. “Yes. I’m a school friend of April’s. And I was just…”
Her voice trailed off, but thankfully, April jumped in to bail her out once again. “Studying. We were studying for our classes.”
Steph enthusiastically nodded, hoping that Melonie wouldn’t see the crowbar or the ski mask that were lying around somewhere. Melonie scratched her chin, scrutinising the situation. “Hmm, I don’t know. I’ve heard what you ‘studying for classes’ sounds like with Ophelia. Most of the time it sounds more like she’s-”
“Melonie!”
“-Pegging your asshole with the biggest strapon she owns. And really April, aren’t you the one telling me that it’s rude to interrupt? You really should learn to be more considerate.”
April was taking audible deep breaths, on the verge of hyperventilating. “Ophelia is my girlfriend. What we do is none of your business, nor the business of any guests I have.” Her cheeks were starting to flush a deep crimson. Steph got the feeling that she should’ve been amused, but her own heart was pounding too much to focus on the situation. “And I know you don’t like surprise visitors, I don’t either, and I’m sorry for that. Now can you please just leave us alone for a bit?”
Melonie shrugged her shoulders. “Hey, I don’t really care all that much. You know Iris is the one who has a hard time dealing with it.”
It was getting to be too much for Steph. All these names, all these new people she didn’t want to deal with. All she had wanted was to steal April’s project, and now she was getting wrapped up in something even bigger. “Who, um, who exactly is ‘Iris?’”
There was a moment of silence as Melonie gave her a sideways look. April cringed in place. “Iris? She’s the creepy girl standing right behind you.”
“Hello, fellow mortal.” Steph jumped at the new voice coming from right behind her. She spun around, and sure enough, there was someone new. Someone she hadn’t even heard approach. A pale girl, with lilac hair and matching eyes. Even though it was night, she was wearing a light sundress, one that appeared to flow in a nonexistent breeze. Her head was cocked slightly to the side in a vaguely unsettling way.
Though what was most unsettling was the possibilities of how she had appeared. Steph knew for a fact that she hadn’t come from the door. Had she snuck in through the window at some point? Was she hiding in April’s closet beforehand, breathing down her neck the entire time?
“Yes, hello Iris, so awesome of you to join us as well.” April spoke in a strained voice, through clenched teeth. “Everything’s fine here, I’m perfectly fine, nobody’s in any danger. Steph here is my classmate, we were studying for a bit, and she was just getting ready to leave. Okay?”
Everyone’s eyes turned to stare at Steph, and something inside her broke. It was too much. This was supposed to be a simple heist, and now everything was just getting more and more convoluted. She didn’t trust any of the other girls in this room. Nothing made sense to her, so as far as Steph was concerned, there was only one option left. The emergency option. To regain control of the situation.
“Alright, no sudden movements. Just do what I say and nobody gets injured.” She pulled out her switchblade and brandished it threateningly, pointing it back and forth between the room’s various occupants. “Money and valuables in the bag. I don’t want to cut you, but I will if I have to.”
All three pairs of eyes stared at her. None of them spoke a word. A sense of relief washed over Steph, as she realised that she was finally back in control. Real fear would do that to a person. Even if she had no intention of actually stabbing anyone, the threat of doing so was more than enough leverage to get her way. It looked like her victims were so terrified they couldn’t even move, which was all the reassurance Steph needed to press her advantage. “Hey, you dumb fucks listening? All the money you’ve got, in the bag. Quickly.” She spun around as she spoke, alternating who she was pointing the tip of the knife at.
Finally, April broke the silence. She did so with a loud smack of her palm against her forehead. “You know what? Fuck it, I tried. I did my part.”
As she turned around to walk away, Iris called out to her. “Where are you going, April? Do you not want to stay here with us and the intruder, for the sake of safety?”
“Yeah April,’ Melonie joined in. “She’s got a knife. It’s really dangerous here, and I’m getting scared. Can’t you stay here to defend me from this vicious attack?”
“Nope. Not doing this. My due diligence is over, and whatever happens isn't my problem anymore.” Steph didn’t even react to April’s overall nonchalance as she made her way out of the room, only pausing when halfway through the door frame. “I don’t know, I’ll just lounge on the couch or hang out with Kass for the night. “Just… try to be nice, okay? We’ve got classes in the morning.”
With that, April closed the door and walked away. Steph was now alone with Melonie and Iris. Something about the room felt off. She couldn’t put her finger on why, but Steph felt nervous - like she was on the verge of panicking
There was nothing to be afraid of. She was in control of the situation. She had a knife, and the other two girls were defenceless. What reason could there possibly be for concern?
“Al-alright then, both of you. Same deal. Your money and your valuables, and I’ll let both of you go.” She hated the stutter that made its way into her voice. Steph waved her weapon around in an attempt to pull the focus back into the area where she had control. “I don’t want to use this knife, but I will if I have to.”
“What knife?” The strange purple haired girl was still staring at her, eyes unfocused and unblinking. “Brandishing an implement of sexual pleasure, often known as a ‘vibrator,’ is a strange way to coerce others.”
Steph blushed. She cursed herself again for not properly checking her bag beforehand. If she’d just properly done her inventory one last time, she wouldn’t be in this situation. But she had to make the best with what she had, and that was using her trusty vibe as a weapon. “Hey! It-it can hurt. I’ll jab you in the gut if you don’t back off.”
Iris did not back off. “Maybe you would have. Except you didn’t have time for your daily masturbation session, did you? And now you’re too swept up on your own personal desires and arousal to focus on much else.”
How could this stranger have known about that? Was it really so obvious? Steph grimaced as she thought about how she’d rushed out the door earlier. To be fair, she hadn’t planned on staying out for very long, and she certainly hadn’t planned on running into anyone. The whole operation was supposed to be a quick in and out so she could have enough time to rub one out before her next class. But just because she was getting distracted over how much she wanted to put the vibrator in her hand to proper use,
“That’s-that’s not important right now! And it’s none of your business! And it’s not even true!” Steph tried to bluff, but she could tell her flushed cheeks were giving her away. “Anyway, it’s not the point right now. I’m still robbing you.”
“Are you sure about that? I don’t think that’s the real reason you came here.” Iris’s voice was intoxicating. There was something about it that drew Steph in, that made it hard for her to focus. To remember why she was there at all. “You came here because you wanted to after last time. Not for April, for me. Your Mistress.”
The memories were getting hard to keep track of. Steph could tell that something was wrong, but she couldn’t quite figure out what. Sure, her previous time with Iris had been incredible, something incredible that she desperately wanted to repeat. Even though the details eluded her, she remembered that much.
Melonie let out a short musical laugh. “Wow, you’re really getting into this, aren’t you? And here I was just starting to think you were kinda boring. I like what you’re planning here. We’ll be sure to give her a night she never forgets.”
“No.” Iris spoke in a curt tone, Her words were different this time, more intense. Steph swore she could hear them directly in her brain. “I am claiming this one as my own. None shall interfere, lest they face the wrath of the cosmos itself.”
Steph didn’t really understand what was happening, but she was too stunned to protest. Melonie, however, appeared to understand perfectly, She sounded a lot more upset with her response. “Wait, that’s not fair! A human trespassing on the lair of a goddess is literally my thing, it’s too perfect for me to pass up on. Besides, we both know I saw her first. The least you could do is share.”
“This will not be your only chance. As the wheel of time continues to infinity, there will be other foolish mortals for you to prey on. But for this one I am invoking the ancient human right of ownership. I believe they call it ‘dibs’’”
There was a tension in the air between the two girls. Steph felt horribly out of place, like she’d stumbled across something her mind wasn’t supposed to see. Melony had a set of foxtails popping out from behind her that Steph was certain weren’t there a moment ago, and the air surrounding Iris was starting to blur. Even though she remained standing, Steph felt impossibly small, utterly dwarfed by the auras surrounding her.
Then all at once the tension dissipated. “Fair enough, I can’t argue with dibs.” Melonie shrugged her shoulders. “It’s nice to see you really care about something in this world for a change.”
Iris nodded in agreement. “I appreciate the consideration. It will not be forgotten.”
‘I’m holding you to that. Next one’s mine, okay?” A yellow glow surrounded Melonie, and she popped out of existence before Steph could comprehend what was happening.
The whole situation was utterly surreal. Steph was alone with Iris, vibrator in hand, and still struggling to keep track of what was real. Iris was her Mistress, wasn’t she? Had she been here before? But why did she feel like a stranger? And what was the deal with her and the other girl? Steph knew that she’d caught a glimpse of some unfathomable power, something impossible for her mind to truly comprehend.
All in all she was finally ready to admit that maybe she was out of her depth here.
“Um, alright. I’ve decided to stop this robbery and let you go. So I’ll just, uh, be on my way now. Alright?”
“Go where? You cannot leave, your place is here.” The words sunk into Steph, as if they were being written into her very soul. She couldn’t resist her Mistress’s pull. Leaving her side was unthinkable and impossible. Both in terms of willpower and physically, because Steph was pretty sure she saw the windows melt into a solid wall.
“Are you ready to embrace the void? To become one with something greater, to have your mind and soul poured into the cracks of our universe?” Iris was levitating off the ground. Light distorted around her as her body shifted into an absence of anything, a humanoid shape of nothingness that seemed to stretch into infinity. Steph was ready to submit, to pledge her very being for all eternity and surrender her very mind. There was just one burning question inside that needed to be asked first.
“Um, will I get to kiss your titties while embracing the void? Sorry, I’m like… really horny right now.”
“...Yes, this action shall be allowed.”
Sounded like a good deal to Steph.
“No, Iris, for the last time we can’t keep her.” April’s voice was stern for a change. Steph found herself shirking at the tone, given the usually timid nature of her classmate. “I know that you know better than that, don’t try to feign ignorance on this one.”
“But April, don’t you understand? This one wishes to stay with me. You can ask her herself, she loves belonging to me. It gives her a place of value in the universe.” It was true. Steph’s heart soared anytime she thought of her Mistress, and she knew that she would do anything for her sake. The mere thought of being separated was almost physically painful. Her memories of the previous night were fuzzy, but her memories of everything before that night were fuzzy as well. It didn’t matter. Her role wasn’t to think, it was to obey.
However, April didn’t appear to see it that way. “Yeah, sure she does. But you’re not going to keep taking care of her. You’re going to play with her for a couple days, have your fun, and then start neglecting her when she’s emotionally dependent on you. And guess who’s going to have to cuddle her and give her daily affirmations then?” April put her hands on her hips. “We’re not doing this, it’s not open for debate. You can’t keep her. You won’t take care of her properly.”
“Yes I will! She’s my precious little thing, and I want her. There is nothing within this reality or any other that could provide her with a better life than myself.” That was one statement Steph could at least agree on. She remained still, unspeaking, waiting for her Mistress’s next instruction. Being perfectly obedient as usual. “By my side, she’ll want for nothing and have everything she could possibly desire. It would be cruel of you to keep her away.”
“Except you have no idea what she wants, do you? Come on Iris, don’t drag this out. I’m not budging here.”
There was a faint humming in the room. The air itself began to vibrate, as splinters of the void began to spread from Iris. “AND DO YOU TRULY THINK YOURSELF CAPABLE OF STOPPING ME? YOU FORGET YOUR PLACE, MORTAL. I AM OLDER THAN THIS GALAXY AND I WILL WATCH IT BURN BEFORE I CEASE EXISTING.” Iris raised her hand, and Steph felt the pure concentrated energy surrounding her Mistress. She forced herself to avert her eyes, because no being alive deserved to witness such absolute power. “REALITY ITSELF IS SCULPTED IN MY IMAGE. I AM EVERYTHING THAT WAS AND EVERYTHING THAT WILL BE CONDENSED INTO A FORM YOU ARE BARELY CAPABLE OF COMPREHENDING. IF I WILL SOMETHING, THEN THAT IS WHAT SHALL BE, AND YOU CANNOT HOPE TO STAND IN MY WAY.”
Her voice was louder than the roar of the ocean and quiet as a whisper. It filled her mind, and it was both part of her thoughts and nothing she could ever hear. Steph felt her body lifting into the air, as the sheer force of her Mistress’s presence caused all sorts of objects in the room to gravitate around her. Literally. She felt as if she was next to the heart of the universe, the beat of the cosmos itself, pulling her in to become one with it. It was an inescapable force of pure inevitability. Trying to fight against it would be like fighting against the flow of time itself.
April was unamused. “Alright, that’s it. I’m cancelling our next game night. AND! The next time Ophelia comes over, she’ll be allowed to play with everyone except for you.”
The force shattered. Steph collapsed on the ground, all the energy surrounding them dissipating in an instant. “No, that won’t be necessary. I… apologise. I will be well behaved and respectful from now on.” Her Mistress sounded almost dejected, even ashamed. “You are right. I am not well acquainted with the needs of mortals, and my knowledge proves to be lacking. I will not bind her to me.”
The room went silent for a moment. Steph knew she wouldn’t say a word, but this time she was joined by the other two. Finally, April spoke up, this time in a quieter tone. “You’ve really grown attached to her, haven’t you.” There was no response, but the silence between them was louder than any words could be.
“Okay, fine. But there will be some conditions.” Steph felt joy begin to well up inside of her as April finally relented. “You’re letting her go, and you’re not going to fuck with her mind and force her to want you. She’ll be showing up to class on time. On the weekends, I will ask her if she wants to come over. And if she does, then and only then, will she come to visit you. Understand?”
“Your terms are acceptable. It shall be done as you request.”
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