“I’m sorry, you’re a what?” she blurted.

“I’m a hypnokinkster.”

“No, no, I heard you, just…”

I chuckled. I knew no one could hear us over the din of the café.

“It’s okay. I know it’s weird,” I said, blushing.

“Oh no! It’s okay to be into weird stuff, I’m not gonna shame you, it’s just… hypnosis?”

“Yeah.”

“Like… cluck like a chicken hypnosis?”

I laughed. “Well, not in any of my scenes. But yeah.”

“How does that even work?”

“Well, you know how if you’re sitting in a movie theater watching a movie, and you get so caught up in the movie that you momentarily forget that you’re sitting in a movie theater looking at a screen?”

“Yeah…?”

“That’s a trance state. That movie puts you in a trance. Hypnosis is when someone deliberately uses their words to do it.”

“…Huh.”

“I’m sorry, it’s weird. We don’t have to do that if you don’t—”

“No! It’s interesting. I, uh… Can you try it on me?”

“What!? Here? I mean, I could, it’s just that a coffee shop isn’t the most ideal spot to hypnotize someone, but… would you like to try it?”

“Yes!”

“Okay.” I took some deep breaths. “You’ve already been doing this, but just look into my eyes.”

She contained a small laugh. “Okay.”

“Good. Now, you may think that hypnosis is this magic spell that puts you to sleep or something, but it’s not that at all. All it is is focus. The only thing that you need to do is listen to and obey my words.

“So, to begin with, while you focus on my eyes, go ahead and focus on your breathing. Often times hypnotists will have you take deep breaths to slow down your breathing and put you in more of a relaxed state, and right now I want you to do that. Take a deep breath in…”

She obeyed.

“And out.”

She obeyed again.

“Good. You’re already doing very well. And as you fixate on my words, you’ll notice the sounds of the rest of the café starting to kind of fade into the background. You’ve already been doing this as we’ve been carrying out this conversation, yes?”

“Yes.”

“Then you know that in this little bubble of our conversation, there’s very little that can disturb us. Very little that can disturb you. So, in a way, you’ve already been focusing, fixating on me. All I’m doing is intensifying that focus.

“And as I do that, you may notice your body start to fall slack a little bit. You’ll remain sitting upright, but your arms are moving to a more comfortable position. Your mouth is falling open a little bit, that’s right. Very good.”

A waitress came by, gesturing with a coffee pot. I silently waved her away. My date showed no signs of noticing, her eyes still locked onto mine.

“Alright. I’m going to give you a suggestion, and you’ll follow it effortlessly, because you’ve already been following my suggestions so effortlessly. I want you to put your finger to your nose and hold it there. Put your finger there now.”

She obeyed.

“And when I snap my fingers, you’ll awaken.” I snapped.

She jumped a little, then laughed.

“And that’s all there is to it!”

“Wow!” She chuckled nervously. “And that’s your…”

“Well,” I blushed again. “There’s usually a bit more of a power play dynamic to it. But yeah… maybe talk more about it over a fourth date?”

She blushed too. “I think I’d like that.”

Our food arrived, and we ate.