Characters:

Puck/Robin Goodfellow: A trickster Faerie and gender-fluid shape shifter. Servant to Oberon

Oberon: King of the Fae. Powerful and dominant. Seeks Titania’s changeling child and control of all the Fae.

Titania: The Faerie Queen, whose beauty is irresistible to all Fae and mortals. The only equal to Oberon’s power.

Lysander: Athenian man in love with Hermia. Wants to flee Athens to marry his beloved.

Hermia: Beautiful Athenian maid. In love with Lysander but somewhat prudish.

Demetrius: Another Athenian man in love with Hermia who does not return his affections.

Helena: Desperate Athenian maid hopelessly in love with Demetrius who can’t stand her.

Bottom: An overzealous actor who has come to the woods to rehearse.

Peaseblossom, Cobweb, Mote, Mustardseed: Faerie maidens in Titania’s train. Unflinchingly loyal to the Queen.

Act II Scene I

Rough winds were kicking through the woods as Robin Goodfellow, a very gender-fluid Hobgoblin also known as Puck, took shelter within a circle of standing stones. There the winds and drops of rain hardly touched them and they were greeted by serving girls that had been invisible outside of the circle. A lively band filled the enclosed meadow with warmth, only a hint of their otherworldly songs escaping into the deep woods.

“How now, spirit?” Puck yelped at a nearby pixie, her compact frame barely reaching their chest. “Whither wander you?”

The shapely sprite put her hands on her wide hips and huffed. “Over hill, over dale, through bush, through briar. Over park, over pale, through flood, through fire. I do wander fucking everywhere!” She explained huffily.

Puck chided her. “Oh, now you’ve gone and broken the verse.”

The young sprite peered closer at them and then opened her face in shock.

“Either I mistake your shake and making quite, or else you are the shrewd and knavish sprite called Robin Goodfellow. Are you not he that seduces the maidens of the villagry?”

Damn, so they’ve been found out already. That was the hazard of being a celebrity.

Puck knew they’d have to ramp up their game. They weren’t here for idle chit-chat. They were here to pump some information for Oberon, and this star-struck sprite would have to do.

Puck smiled, their face warping and changing. Their jawline became stronger, more masculine. Their hair shimmered and turned coal-black, neatly slicked over their elegant crown. Their arms and body became more muscular, dashing, even lusty. In their eyes shone the same wild fire, now trained squarely on the sprite as she gazed at the irresistible image of masculinity before her.

“Thou speaks aright. I am that merry wanderer of the night. And it’s ‘they’ not ‘he’.”

The sprite gazed into Puck’s eyes as they stalked closer, her body flushing with heat. Puck swayed their head back and forth slightly, the flame in their eyes fixating their prey.

“I jest to Oberon and make him smile, when I a fat and bean-fed horse beguile. I’m rather good at beguiling, y’know. And what of you, sweet spirit? Who do you serve?”

“I…I’d feign not tell…” The sprite mumbled with heavy breath. Puck advanced on her, their dexterous hands running over the contours of her body, squeezing her plump thighs and ass.

“Who do you serve, sprite?”

The fairy maid squirmed in pleasure under Puck’s hands. She smiled, and bit down on her lip. Puck sighed and then gently ran a finger over her twat.

“I serve the fairy queen!!” The sprite moaned under Puck’s caress. “To dew her orbs upon the green!”

“Yes, Queen Titania certainly has some remarkable orbs,” Puck mused. They turned the sprite around, their hands groping and pinching the sprite’s nipples, their magic cock springing to life and slithering up the sprite’s skirt. The sprite gave up her vain attempt at resistance and pushed herself back onto Puck’s hardness, letting her delicate netherlips slide around the head.

Puck bucked their hips, slow and steady, battering down the walls of the sprite’s defense as skillfully as they battered their way into her cunt.

“And has she the child with her? That lovely boy stolen from an Indian king?”

“Ah! Yes!” The sprite cried helplessly. “She never had so sweet a changeling!”

Puck smiled, and not just from getting a good lay. Oberon would reward them well for information about Titania’s coveted changeling boy. The whole realm of the Fae had been in chaos since the king and queen decided to lock themselves inside their little custody battle.

“Now, good sprite. I must thank you for such happy news. Perchance I’ll change your shape. How would you fancy being a wandering whore, to tempt the townsmen into drunken slumber while their crops wither in the fields?”

“Oh! OH! Aye, master!” The sprite babbled, her mind frazzled by Puck’s dong. “Whatever thou wilt, lord!”

Before Puck could finish their spell with a climax, a great gust of wind shook the faerie circle and a blinding flash of lightning lit up the sky. Puck froze, terror seizing their heart.

“But room, fairy!” they said, pulling out of her slit. “Here comes Oberon.”

“And my mistress!” The fairy said, pulling her robes over her naked tits. “Would that he were gone!” She turned and, before Puck could utter a word, kicked the shape-shifting hobgoblin in the balls.

“Knave!” she said, before skipping away.

“Some other time, then?” Puck called after her, rubbing their crotch.

The wind howled ferociously as an ethereal woman draped in silver entered the grove, a train of woodland nymphs in her wake. Puck dropped their tall and dashing form for one the size of an acorn and jumped behind a thorn bush, their eyes tracking the glistening woman.

“Ill met by moonlight, proud Titania!” A voice thundered through the woods as Oberon stood on the bough of a mighty oak tree on the far side of the clearing, his antlers jutting from his skull.

“What, jealous Oberon? Faeries, skip hence. I have forsworn his bed and company.”

“Tarry, rash wanton!” Oberon somersaulted out of the tree and landed no more than an arm’s length from the tall, veiled queen. “Am not I thy lord?”

Titania lifted her veil.

“Then I must be thy lady.”

Puck’s eyes nearly popped out of his head! They had seen the queen of the Faeries many times before, but part of her enchantment was to inspire the instant, red-hot affections of any Fae or mortal that gazed on her face, not to mention her other, very amply attractive charms just a little lower. Puck let their long tongue loll out of his mouth as their miniature sized cock sprang to life. For a second, they wondered why they never sought to serve the queen as her devoted minion, but then they shook thmself back to their senses. They were bound to Oberon.

Many other faeries in the grove were not, however, and Puck could see dozens of fresh faces staring slack-jawed at the radiant queen, their eyes empty of any intelligence.

“Why art thou here?” Titania said, her sparkling grey eyes even with the king’s. “Oh, that’s right. Theseus, the duke of Athens is getting married to Hyppolyta tomorrow. So what? Come from the farthest steppes of India, but that forsooth the bouncing Amazon?” Titania pouted and shook her body up and down playfully.

Puck nearly blew a wad.

“I know you still jack off to memories of Hippolyta, your buskin’d mistress and warrior love. And now you’re coming to make sure Theseus gives her a wild wedding night?”

Oberon glared back at his saucy wife, refusing to be antagonized.

“How canst thou thus for shame, Titania, glance at my credit with Hippolyta, knowing I know thy love to Theseus? Oh, I know all about your little vacation to Crete with him, thou slut!”

Titania shot him an icy stare. Lighting struck overhead causing all the onlooking faeries to cower.

“These are the forgeries of jealousy!” she hissed. “And never, since the middle summer’s spring, have we met on hill, dale, forest, or mead. And just look what’s become of it! The weather is out of control, crops and harvests are rotting in the field, and we’re getting hurricanes in freaking Athens!”

“I knew not you cared for the well being of mortals so,” Oberon said, crossing his arms.

“I don’t! But the wind’s absolute devastation for my hair!”

“Do you amend it then?” Oberon pressed. “It lies in you. Why should Titania cross her Oberon? I do but beg a little changeling boy to be my henchman.”

Titania threw back her hair. “Set your heart at rest. The Fairyland buys not the child from me. His mother was a votress in my order. Oh, and she was quite the talented priestess,” Titania said with a far away look in her eye. “The nights we had with each other on the beach watching the ships come in, laughing as we saw the sails get knocked up by the wanton, horny wind.”

“Partaking in a little too much hashish with her, perhaps?” Oberon offered.

Titania scowled. “But, being mortal, she of that boy did die. And for her sake do I rear up the boy and for her sake I will not part with him.”

Oberon sighed, clearly getting nowhere with diplomacy. “How long in this wood do you intend to stay?”

“Perchance till after Theseus’ wedding day,” Titania answered, glancing side-long at Oberon, her elegant neck flashing in the moonlight. “If you will patiently dance in our round and see our moonlight revels, go with us.”

Oberon took another step closer, almost as if he would accept the queen’s invitation. Then he held up long smooth, sliver of selenium, holding it by a rawhide cord so that it dangled and in front of Titania’s eyes.

“Give me that boy and I will go with thee...”

Puck felt the king’s voice in their mind, stifling all thought, their will bowing before Oberon’s divine authority. The king trained all his influence on the shimmering queen.

“Give me that boy...you must give him to me...you yield to Oberon...”

Titania watched the glowing crystal, her eyes lazily tracing its arc through the air. With a cool smile she raised her hand slowly, gently clasping her fingers around the crystal. She stared the king straight back in the eye.

“You do forget who taught you such paltry tricks, Faerie King,” she gloated. She squeezed her fist once and the crystal crumbled to fine powder, leaving Oberon holding nothing more than a string.

“Faeries, away!” Titania announced to her train. “We shall chide downright if I longer stay.”

A swirl of mist engulfed Titania and her followers, sweeping them away from the grove as swiftly as if they had never came. Oberon was left fuming alone in the dark.

“Well, go thy ways. Thou shalt not from this wood until I torment thee for this injury.”

Puck could see the dark brooding thoughts over the king’s head like a storm cloud and decided that now would be a perfect time to make their exit before—.

“My gentle Puck! Come hither!”

Damn.

“How now, my lord?” Puck said, springing life-sized into view. Oberon sat down on a throne of boulders and moss, letting his legs splay wide.

“Ho, full of vexation and tension am I,” Oberon moaned. “My first command to you is to help me think. You know that which I desire.”

They certainly did and if they hurried maybe they could still make an escape.

“Truly, my lord, but I must be off to terrorize some of the farmers’ daughters and...”

Oberon pulled back his robe, his massive pale phallus gleaming in the silver light.

“Now, Puck. And you know what form pleases me the most.”

Puck was pulled towards their king’s mighty prick, their mind and body bound by ancient sorcery. As they walked their hair grew longer and finer while their legs became long and slender, their torso morphing into an hourglass shape as two heavy tits swelled on their chest. Puck knelt in front of Oberon now in the guise of a sultry, red-headed nymph, their face soft and smouldering.

“Yes, Sire. I doth obey.”

Puck wrapped their luscious lips around Oberon’s shaft and began servicing their king as commanded. Oberon leaned back, resting his antlered head on his arm and sank into the pleasure. At last, an idea came to him.

“Do you remember when we were on that sea cliff a few centuries ago and heard a mermaid singing from a dolphin’s back with such dulcet and harmonious breath that the rude sea grew civil at her song?”

“The one with the huge rack?” Puck asked, slipping Oberon’s cock in their cleavage. “I remember.”

“Yes, well whilst you were distracted by the siren’s sex lullaby, I saw Cupid flying between the cold moon and Earth all armed, driven mad with desire by the sea-maid’s music. A certain aim he took at a fair vestal throned by the west and loosed his love shaft smartly from his bow.”

“Wait!” Puck reared back, “’loosed his love shaft?’ You mean he blew his wad? Like this ‘love-shaft’ is about to?” They gently twisted both of their feminine hands around Oberon’s hard meat, making the faerie king groan appreciatively.

“Yes, that too,” Oberon sighed. “But, no I mean he fired his arrow, foolish spirit.”

“Oh, well you could have just said that.”

“In any case,” Oberon reach down, guiding Puck’s mouth to his cock and gripping their head. “Marked I where the bolt of Cupid fell. It fell upon a little western flower, before milk-white but now purple with love’s wound and maidens call it ‘love-in-obedience.’ The juice of it on sleeping eyelids laid will make any man or woman madly dote and submit to the next living creature that it sees.”

Oberon grunted and loosed his love shaft in Puck’s mouth, jets of pearly white cum flooding the gender-fluid hobgoblin’s throat. The king sat back, relaxing in the after glow as Puck swayed on their knees, their lust yoked to the will of their king. Oberon at last heaved a deep sigh and beckoned Puck closer, wrapping his arm around their waist to fondle their tits.

“Fetch me this herb and be thou here again ere the Leviathan can swim a league.”

Puck cocked their head, the big words too much to concentrate on while their tits were getting played with.

"Uhh...is that fast?”

Oberon took his hands away and gave Puck a quick slap on their ass.

“Bring me the magic love flower and be back quickly! That way I can humiliate my royal bitch of a wife and take her changeling while she’s horny as all Hecate.”

“Oh! Right!” Puck said, getting up. “I’ll wrap a corset around the earth in forty minutes!”

“Corset? You mean a girdle,” said Oberon.

Puck ran their hands over their flaring hips and busty chest. “With this figure, I think I’d do better with a corset. Well, ta-ta!”

With a leap, the spirit disappeared into the woods, leaving Oberon alone to eagerly ponder how to best fuck with Titania.

“Maybe I could get her to fall in love with a monstrous troll, or maybe just with her own reflection?” Oberon mused. “Mmmm...no. No, it’s been done. Hmm...perhaps with a porcupine. But soft, who comes here?”

The snapping twigs and loud shouts from beyond the grove called Oberon’s attention. Someone was coming and not any of his Faerie kind judging by how much noise they were making. Probably some clumsy human folk. The king sat back in his throne still and silent as a boulder as two humans came crashing through the undergrowth, their eyes incapable of seeing Oberon even as he sat right in front of them.

“I love thee not, therefore pursue me not!” shouted a brusque man dressed in fine silk from the town of Athens. “Where is Lysander and fair Hermia?”

“I told you already!” the woman pleaded with the man pulling at his arm. “They’ve absconded into the forest to marry and live happily far away from here. You need not bother with them!”

“How can I let them go when I am betrothed to Hermia? If you didn’t want me to chase after them, why on earth did you tell me they were running away, o foolish Helena?”

“Uh...well...” Helena blushed. “I just...you know...thought you might notice me more if I told you some juicy secret. In hindsight though, I guess that was against my own interests.”

“Hmmph!” the man huffed, spying the landscape from the top of an outgrowing rock. “And what interest is that?”

“You, Demetrius!” The woman fawned. “You are what interests me, you stubborn, hard-hearted adamant, deadly sexy man! You draw me! Leave your power to draw and I shall have no power to follow you!”

“Do I entice you?” Demetrius said, throwing his arms out in exasperation. “Do I speak you fair, or rather do I not, in plainest truth, tell you I do not, nor cannot love you?”

The maiden, Helena, sank to her knees, her hands grasping at the man’s thighs. Oberon could see the helpless desire in the woman’s eyes as she gazed longingly at Demetrius’s body, and, despite himself, he pitied her. The maid stared up at Demetrius in a way that would flame any mortal’s arousal, lifting her dress above her waist, baring her shapely backside.

“And even for that do I love you the more. I am your spaniel, and, Demetrius, the more you beat me I will fawn on you. Use me but as your spaniel,”

At this point Helena took out a leather strap with a buckle. She bared her neck and slid the collar around her skin, pulling the loose end in front of her, constricting it around her neck, choking her.

“Spurn me, strike me, spank me! Please! Please spank me! Degrade me, Demetrius!” she offered him the end of the strap. “What worser place can I beg in your love than to be used as you use your dog?”

Demetrius’s hand floated to the leash, feeling the smooth leather between his fingers, the delicate pressure it carried from being wrapped so tight around her throat. Helena looked up at him submissively, panting with her pink tongue lolling out of her mouth.

“You are far too into this,” Demetrius said at last, throwing back the leash. “Tempt not the hatred of my spirit. Let me go! Or if thou follow me, do not believe but I shall do thee mischief in the wood!”

The haughty young man turned and sprinted away into the eaves of the trees, leaving poor Helena sobbing on the forest floor.

“Fie, Demetius! Your wrongs do set a scandal on my sex! I’ll follow thee and make a heaven of hell, to die upon the hand I love so well!”

Helena picked herself up and trudged miserably after her unwilling lover. Oberon watched her, finally daring to move after she had left the clearing.

“Fare thee well, nymph. Ere he do leave this grove, thou shalt fly him and he shall seek thy love.”

The king paced around the clearing until he saw a small grasshopper bounding its way over a mulberry bush. The grasshopper leaped to the top and then jumped onto Oberon’s antlers. With the speed of a snake, Oberon shot his hand out and grabbed the insect by the wing.

“Has thou the flower there?” he asked, holding the grasshopper in front of his face. The insect shook itself loose and sprung into the air, transforming immediately into Puck’s gender neutral form. Puck bowed low and presented Oberon with a small bouquet of several purple and white flowers.

“Ay, there they are.”

Oberon picked up the flowers and smelled them appreciatively, chuckling to himself.

“Yes, this will undo Titania’s iron will. I know where she’s sleeping tonight, and I know she’ll be so drunk on power from ordering her enraptured servants around that she’ll be completely defenceless against the charms of this flower. Once I smear her eyes with the nectar, she will be helplessly in love with the next creature she sees.”

“But, my king, are you sure the queen’s power will not be too strong for such a frivolous charm?” Puck asked, crossing their arms over their chest.

“It’s hardly as frivolous as you’d think,” said Oberon, holding up a dainty flower to Puck’s face. He twirled it delicately through his fingers, watching as the Puck’s eyes followed it back and forth, like bees lured by nectar.

“This flower is a powerful charm indeed...It can enchant even the most willful creatures...and bring them into an obedient stupor...it can silence their wills and steal their memories...remaking them as helpless puppets for he that holds the flower...who do you serve Puck?”

“I...” Puck swayed on their feet, their mind captivated by the twirling flower petals. “I...serve...King Oberon...”

Oberon smiled and handed them a handful of flowers. “Excellent good. Now, listen well to my command. A sweet Athenian lady is in love with a disdainful youth. Anoint his eyes but do it when the next thing he espies may be the lady. Thou shalt know the man by the very gaudy, tacky, buffoonish Athenian garments he hath on. And look thou meet me ere the first cock crow.”

Leaving the flowers in his dazed servant’s possession, Oberon lightly tapped his fingers against Puck’s ears, snapping the hobgoblin back to attention.

“Fear not, my lord. Your servant shall do so.”

Jumping high into the air, Puck stretched their arms wide, letting the forest breeze blow them away into the branches.

Oberon looked at the single flower in his hand and then faded into the shadows, stalking his way towards Titania’s forest camp.